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cahms said that hes not suffering from any psychiatric problems and that they havent ruled out social communication issues but it could be just his personality.Im more confused than before if its just his personality why do certain noises drive him crazy? Why does he struggle so much with change?Why is he able to achieve high marks academically but cant tie his own shoes or wash his own hair?Why does he sit for ages just staring into space just in his own world unresponsive to anything going on around him?Why does he have the most major tantrums over seemingly the smallest things where he hits bites and scratches himself and anyone watching can tell he has no control over it?Hes 11 now and im so scared that his whole childhood is going to be blighted by this as it has already.I hear so many stories of people getting a dx in their late teens or later who feel that they have been robbed of their childhoods wrongly labelled as weird,anti social,agressive,badly behaved all the labels apart from the right one which may have offered them some support or at least some answers.My son says "I know im different but I dont know why and I dont know how to make it better" .Camhs said that the peaditrician who assesed him before had told them she had assesed him for as.This was the one who said hes a little bit depressed we were in her office for 45 minutes and she didnt even speak to him.At one point he went up to his baby brother and tickled and kissed him and she said "oh he wouldnt do that if he was aspergers they dont interact and show emotion that way"Camhs asked if she had even done a checklist she had at the end of appointment asked me to hurry up and fill it in because she had another appointment and didnt even look at it when i was finished.National autistic society have said to ask gp to refer us to someone specialsed in aspergers because some children can put on a show of complete normality for short periods of time so i guess that is what ill do I also plan to start keeping a diary.Nobody has shown an interest in school reports even though they reveal a huge amount of his problems at school I have brought them to every appointment only one who has read them is gp who seems to be only one taking me seriously.
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If I'm totally honest - I think we have serious issues with lack of funding for diagnosis in the UK as well as a total ignorance within the healthcare profession.

Whilst this has good sides (your only prescribed medications if you really need them) it also means lots of things are overlooked, an example being the non existence of adult AS or ADD.

Is Cahms Cambridge?

All I can really think is that you may have to go private if the NHS doesn't work out.
It sounds like the dx should hav been given and wasn't for some reason.

I would DEFINITELY do what the autistic society suggested, and get him checked out by somebody who has experience with Asperger's. I feel great empathy for you and your son, as I have an 11 year old as well (and a 21 year old who went undiagnosed, but has turned out well). There is so much that could be done for your son, even at this age. The diagnosis is the key, and after that, you would receive so much more help and direction to know what to do.

How does your son do at home? Would homeschooling be an option? I say this because it sounds as if every day is a struggle for him, and he is getting constant negative reinforcement from the children at school. He would have changed by now in reaction to that constant negative reinforcement IF HE KNEW HOW.

I'm also curious as to how your schools in the UK will respond to a definite diagnosis of Asperger's. What kind of supports would they offer?

I was also wondering if there might be a possibility of getting him moved to a different school -- for example, I know that here in the U.S. sometimes parent have had success with their children by moving them to a magnet school that concentrates on technical things -- computers, engineering, etc. -- where most of the student body is unusual, if not aspie. It's a much more comfortable fit for the students.

Please keep us updated about your efforts to get a diagnosis for your son, and his experiences in the future. You know him the best, and I think your instincts are accurate. You could be doing some things while waiting for a diagnosis that might be helpful -- reading books on Asperger's and working with him on social skills.

Kris

get him checked out ASAP~ before anything truly horrible happens..........it is quite possible that with the way he's been treated by other students and staff that he could turn even more violent than you have stated....

oops!! ! I posted under "help" I didn't see this one

It seems that things are done very differently here in the UK compared to the states.We have just been through all this with my partners 11 yr old daughter. She does such a good job of 'acting normal' that many people don't see anything different about her at all. Her primary school completely dismissed the idea of AS when her mum tried raising the question with them. The way we went in the end was to sit down and make a comprehensive list of her quirky behaviour, anything at all we could think of went on that list. Her tantrums and inability to cope with minor changes in routine, her complete confusion over figures of speech, her insistence on taking everything literally, her general immaturity for her age, spinning, flapping arms about, staring into space for ages, inappropriate social comments etc etc etc
Where possible try to give very specific examples of what you're talking about rather than generalising.
Armed with the list her mum took her to their GP who then referred her to a family centre, where they do an initial assessment to decide who to refer to next. The next stage was a neuro-developmental specialist which is where the formal diagnosis came from. Now that she has a formal diagnosis it forces the school to take her problems seriously instead of just dismissing it all as a neurotic mum. She's now moved up to secondary school anyway and her new school are a lot more helpful than her primary school were. To our surprise the formal diagnosis was JUST that, a diagnosis. No further steps were offered apart from contact details for local support groups. The way of the NHS seems to be to confirm the diagnosis then just leave you to find you own way through the maze!

The U.S. is slightly more helpful, but in the end you have to find your own way through the maze anyway.

Our school is "helpful" (my son is also 11 years old), but sometimes it is too helpful -- i.e., they want to keep my son in special education classes purely because that's what they've BEEN doing, regardless of whether he needs that class or not. We are actually fighting now for LESS support in the school as opposed to MORE support. We feel as if we have to deal with each new teacher on an individual basis, trying to guess just how hard to push and how much we should just lay off and let things run. Very frustrating.

Kris