Parents: Did you always "know"?

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Parents who find out their offspring are odd in some way are often heard to say, "in a way I always knew he/she was a genius/gay/a criminal/etc." My question is how early or late did you sense something unusual about your aspie child, or VERY early signs you might have overlooked.

I had short periods of total unawareness of humans throughout my late infancy and early childhood that puzzled my parents ("she was giggling at me five minutes ago, now she seems to be staring at the wall. Oh, well."). I showed signs of hypersensitivity to heat and light as early as three days after birth. As soon as I could talk (literally, the same day I said my first word) I learned to recite all the planets in the solar system in order. I refused to hear make-believe stories and asked
to be read selections from natural science reference books. I did some things that made people concerned about my hearing.

My mother found none of this concerning until my kindergarten teacher called and asked her why her daughter was still in parallel play and terrified of noise.

Our son seemed different even when a few weeks old. He slept longer than other babies the same age. He sat up, crawled, walked, and spoke months earlier than other babies his age. When he first spoke he often came out with phrases rather than individual words. He made unusual noises when he was a toddler which were amusing to other people but became a concern for us. He had extremely bad temper tantrums as a toddler, worse than any other toddler, and over the most trivial things. He was also very clumsy and fell over a lot.

Once he started pre-school we realised he was definately different, and it wasn't me being paranoid. However, despite speaking to our local Health Visitor about my concerns (when he was pre-school age), he wasn't diagnosed until earlier this year. He is now 6 1/2 years old.

I reached milestones early too. I weaned myself at six months.

I knew something was different with him at a week old. When I took him outside for the first time, when he opened his eyes to the light he screamed bloody murder.

Apparently I refused to accept a pacifier. Is this possibly an Aspie trait? Anyone else? My sister (NT) loved hers to the point of addiction.

I knew their was something about my first son within 24 hours. He didn't sleep, looked around at everything and everyone, and managed to kick his ID tag from off his leg off.

I asked the nurse to take him away to give me a rest because he wouldn't stop screaming. She came back after 15 minutes incredibly stressed and told me in 20 years of being a midwife, she had never heard any baby scream like my son.

My second son (who also has Asperger's) would scream but would always be ok if I took him out to the garden.

Helen

I was never big on my pacifier either. Apparently I did take one, but I stopped using it at around 9 months and absolutely refused after that. But I was very attached to my bottle and I remember still drinking out of it sometimes at age 5 or 6...
My son took a pacifier as well, but he was about the same as I was with mine. He stopped taking it sometime between 9 and 12 months...He was never one of those kids you could get quiet with a pacifier. He thrash and start hitting himself if it was offered and that's not what he wanted. Also, he used to chew on it more than suck. When he was done with the pacifier, he was done. He flat out didn't want it anymore.
Same with the bottle at around 22 months.

I hope this isn't too off-topic . . . One of the main reasons I have yet to tell my parents about AS is that I think my mom would say she's always known and then get emotional, which would make me uncomfortable. She would expect me to get emotional with her and if I didn't, she would fear she had done something wrong and get upset--more emotions! I hope I'm not discouraging any parents from talking to their kids about AS; every parent-child relationship is unique. I just saw the topic, thought of my experiences, and thought it was kind of funny.

when son was little, i was always so concerned about how different he seemed. the pediatrician, however, kept reassuring me that son was fine & i was overreacting. son was fussy, "colicky", didn't play well with others at all, interacted with adults better than kids.....so frustrating when i look back. should've been more forceful with pediatrician.....

My daughter had developmental delays that stemmed form being born at 25weeks gestation.
Every melt down, every screaming fit, every reaction to bright lights, loud noise - delayed crawling, walking, talking - everything - was blamed on her prematurity.

I knew there was something else going on, but no one listened. (yes Ster, it is VERY frustrating!)

I knew/had a feeling that something was different and that the reason she came so early, and won that horrible fight with a reoccuring collapsed lung - beating sepsis - and everything thing else she had endured at birth - that she was intended for greatness.

I first notice something going on when, my daughter was 18 months. We took her to her first art class with children her age, she did not sit down on my lap to hear the book story, and did not want to make any art work, she began to cry and crawled under the table. I walked out and tried the following class. She did it again, thats when I knew there was something but did not know what. My pediatrician suggested a book " 123 magic", which is about discipline. Book did not work. Until she was 23 months we found out about a developmental pediatrician and began the waiting list. Now 27 months old, we found out its Sensory integration disorder, so the touching of glue, and glitter was a big mistake.

I "noticed" all his autistic traits but didn't "know" anything was "wrong" until we were referred to a neurologist. He was 2 1/2 years old. I was sure he was normal because he was just like my husband and me as babies. Nothing else to go by.

My son didn't cry when he was born and rarely did for any reason after, we had to schedule nappy changes he could completely soaked and not react, I knew there was something different but everyone thought I was lucky to have an easy baby. My daughter just seemed completely uninterested in other children, but both had autistic behaviours (spinning, hand flapping, echoing, lining things up etc)which didn't seem odd to us at all. So we knew they were like us not like other people and were pretty fine with that, but we realised that my son at least would need help in school so we got him diagnosed early.

I didn't see the signs. I thought my son was just high maintenance, late talker. He has always been affectionate, so I never thought he could have a form of autism.

In hindsight, earliest sign was at birth. When he was very first delivered and placed on the scale to be weighed, the doctor said, "Huh, look at that." He had his arms, legs, and toes and fingers spread out. I said, "What's wrong with that?" and she said that babies normally curl up in the fetal position so soon after delivery. I figured, he was just spreading out and I thought..."Good for him". I guess, that would be a neurological sign though.

I saw signs like toe walking, head banging, late talker. He seemed to want to play with the neighbors child so I never thought about autism. I did notice that he wouldn't play with his toys, or use his imagination, but then again he did have an imaginary friend (two birds actually, wilbert and tilbert lol. The names came from a PBS cartoon). When I would talk to other mothers about these things they would just say "Oh it's a boy thing, don't worry" So I didn't worry.

I wish I had never listened to those moms and trusted my gut.

My son ws different from the word go. I tried not to compare him with his brother...
When he was borm, he didn't open his eyes to "communicate" with me. Kept his eyes shut for 2 - 3 weeks. Cried and didn't sleep (we called it colic- I now think it was tactile/auditory oversensitivity). Dirtied his nappy (diaper) 10 times a day - no matter how fast I changed him, his skin got raw. Hated baby massage, music and his bed and pram. Was SO quiet when I talked to him later on - didn't babble back.
I asked a nurse about his eye contact when he was a couple of monthes old. She SHOULD have picked up on him... but it took a couple of years until we found out he was autistic.