Anxiety, perfection and frustration problems!! !

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My son (AS) is 7yrs and is having problems in the classroom, from a teachers point of view how or what would be the best way to handle this situation?

My son is struggling with his work, and has problems reading and writing. His meltdowns have gotten worse and more frequent and he also sucks his clothing.

Do you think the teacher needs more training? Should we change classes? Are there questions we should be asking the school?

I would like to hear any ideas, so Im really prepared for the school meeting.

Thanks

This sounds exactly like my sons!

My sons had weekly therapy at an autism/asperger's clinic last year. THey only went to school 4 days/week last year - the other 1 day/week was at the clinic, then fun projects at home.

They had a fabulous Special Ed teacher last year who gave them heaps of support.

First term this year was awful, but we're back on track again with a new fabulous Special Ed teacher.

Does your son have an IEP? If he does, it sounds like it's not working and needs to be reviewed.

Does your son have a psychologist with good knowledge about asperger's? If he doesn't, I recommend it. You can get a 'mental health care plan' from your GP and medicare will pay a substantial chunk of any psychologist's fee.

Helen

hi ibolard
i had a lot of trouble at school not that anyone new what the problem was, but for me in a class room the main problem
was the room its self , solid walls cielings and floor, 10 minutes into the lesson i could still kind of hear the first 5 minutes
of the lesson bouncing of the walls, hmm and in my head, you can imagine how iritating that becomes when all you want
to do is learn and listen to the teacher, but just can not focus. from that point i would start to over load and melt and
loose all interest in my tasks, check the class room, if you can check it when there is no one in there and shout or make
a loud noise to see how much of an echo or reverb there is, if the room has solid walls or an echo, from my expierence
i would not stand a chance of surviving in there even on a one to one basis,
but these are only my expierences and what i would need to help me but i hope it helps.

sounds all too familiar
teacher - needs to set boundaries & stick to them
- must be consistent in all things - seen to be fair
- must not make last minute changes & should talk all changes new topics through
- must not negotiate
- must insist all work is finished otherwise child will be held back from play etc until it's
finished
- keep a quiet classroom - not shriek to get kids attention
- use logic not emotion in discipline
- must seek help from other teachers who have been succesful with aspies in their
classes & YES they do exist
- probably helps if teacher is not a young female
All things that have helped my boy
Hope sometthing is helpful in here

squidmother- ditto !

It sound like his chronic anxiety level has risen significantly, which is quite common as the academic and social expectations increase at this age.

He needs a comprehensive non-academic curriculum including social skills, theory of mind training, EF (executive function) supports, a sensory sensitivity audit and accommodations, a comprehensive bullying program for his environment, teachers and clinician who are adequately trained in Aspergers so they “get it”, an appropriate behavior plan with “incident autopsy procedures” for when incidents occur, likely some language therapy for non logical language constructs, possibly a paraprofessional for generalization of the non academic curriculum and to increase environmental consistency, and referral to the gifted program as his special abilities manifest themselves.


You are on the right track with calling an IEP meeting. Continuing to educate yourself also about Aspergers and the effective “supports” that are needed in school (and elsewhere) is critical.

My child has had some younger female teacher, but once they received a proper education in Apsergers they did a wonderful job. His class usually also gets a student teacher or 2 each year and with the proper preparation and educations it has been a very successful time for both the student teacher and my son (he is mainstream except for a couple hours of pull out for English and for his 1 on 1 or small group non academic curriculum he des have a 1 on 1 para)

bookwormde

Thanks for this thread. Daughter is melting down much more, raging much more.
I had heard that rages sometimes increase in fequesncy, intensity and duration in
HFA girls as they go through puberty. D.D. is alreay growing some hair under her arms
and wears a bra-- and is not fat-- so I am wondering if the increasing rages could be
from those changes. Also in a gifted program with high expectations. I want to
pull her out and homeschool her to reduce stress for her, but she wants to stay in
because she feels like it would be humiliating to drop out of the gifted program, as
her intellect is her chief source of self validation.

She has no IEP as of yet, because I was worried about what the in-laws would think.
They generally think nothing is wrong and that if she were their child she wouldn't
be "like this."

I have to keep reminding myself that their son (my DH) is most likely on the spectrum--
he has rocked to pthe point of destroying several chairs, used to beat his chest rhythmically
ALL DAY throughout his childhood, does not understand pretend play to this very day,
has said that when he picked pretty flowers he kept them to himself and never shared
them with his mom, does not remember bringing things to show and share, has been
known for his quick temper and rages, makes repetitive vocalizations, claps hands at midline while
grimacing when excited.

And then there is ME: refused to speak English for long periods of time in childhood because
I was obsessed with learning foreign languages; spent hours memorizing book titles and their
authors, had no real friends, mocked and bullied at school; akward gate that resulted in
me wearing corrective shoes, NO understanding of social politics to this very day, compulsive hair pulling.

So probably this is genetic. But what parent doesn't think, "DID I CAUSE THIS? Was there something
wrong with my interactions with my kids?"

Then I look at other kids, whose parents have ha serious addictions and have left them for long
periods of time during formative life stages to go to jail, and are fairly uninvolved. And THIER
kids don't have sensory problems that are incapacitating, THEIR kids get along with others at
school, laugh at the right part of the jokes, hold decent conversations.

But it is SO EASY to blame myself.

SO I am going to try to get an IEP. I am going to step up to the plate and do it.

Thanks for the inspiration.