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Lainie
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

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Joined: 27 May 2007
Age: 60
Gender: Female
Posts: 165
Location: California

24 May 2009, 2:28 am

You know the other day my son said he was riding his bike down the side walk, coming home from a friends house (10 houses down) and he saw a stranger walking on the same sidewalk. When he passed he thanked the person for moving aside.

He came home and told me and kept on saying I didn't talk to him since he was a stranger (which I was happy for) but now I realize....

His theory of mind problem.

He said thank you for the person moving aside while he was on his bike.

Really he should of moved his bike around the person to be polite. But instead the person moved and he didn't realize he should of been the person who moved.

I always love reading about theory of mind since sometimes I have that problem, but for the most part I can read what another person feels ect. That tells me I am not on the spectrum, but I do have other red flags, like ADHD, OCD, Anxiety, Sensory, some social (not too much) problems.

But I think I can read body language (have a little bit of a problem but for the most part I am okay) and hey I can just start talking to someone in the grocery store like I have known them for years. I also have a problem of talking to myself alot. I think that is due to anxiety.

Anyway, this just made me think tonite. Sometimes when I really deeply think I can't let it go.



whipstitches
Deinonychus
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Joined: 12 Feb 2009
Age: 50
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Location: Saskatchewan, Canada

24 May 2009, 9:34 am

I talk constantly, too... but it IS a theory of mind problem. I have no idea that people don't care what I am talking about. I also have a problem with being asked "small talk" questions. For example, if they lady at the check out counter at the grocery store askes me how I'm doing... I will tell her.... until it is time to take my bags and leave the store. Not a big deal if I am only buying a gallon of milk, but sometimes I have a totally FULL cart..... :oops: :lol:



natesmom
Veteran
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24 May 2009, 8:54 pm

He said thank you? How polite!l. I am sure there are times I have done what your son has done and I am ADHD. Sometimes things happen so fast, especially being on the bike - surrounded by all the stimulus as well seeing another person on the sidewalk. That is a lot of information to process all at once. That action could be due to difficulties with theory of mind but I do see NT's doing the same thing. Of course, the reason why they do it could be completely different than your son.

It's also great he kept telling you that he didn't talk to the guy because he was a stranger! He sounds great



Lainie
Snowy Owl
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Joined: 27 May 2007
Age: 60
Gender: Female
Posts: 165
Location: California

24 May 2009, 10:20 pm

Yes, thankfully he is a pretty polite guy. It makes it hard when he will melt down and then you see the other side of him lol. The school just wants to say ODD when it's really aspergers. But there a bunch of dorks anyway lol.

You could be completly right about the ADHD, or sometimes Typical way of doing things. It's just the Theory of Mind facsinates me so I am always trying to figure it out.

I probably never will lol.