Do kids appear more Autistic/AS as the get older?

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My son is 10 dx'd AS and now aswell ADHD,OCD,GAD and Tourettes. I have had a few people that know my son well including my sister, comment that J my son appears more autistic, unattatched etc than ever before.

Does it become more obvious as kids age?

Thanks in advance
aurea xoxox

well, isn't it natural? the expectations on him grow with the age. also, realizing that i am different can make me want to be alone...?

welllllll... whenever I eat High Fructose Corn Syrup, I always wonder if the mercury in it will make me *more autistic*. But I don't mind if it does make me more autistic. doesn't bother me.

If you DON'T want him to be more autistic, maybe avoid the foods that have mercury in them.

I only have one child, and he is 2, so I don't have any firsthand knowledge in this area. But I have friends with children on the spectrum who tell me their kids got more "autistic" around puberty. As you know, puberty varies from person to person. The daughter of one friend went through this at 10 years old, and her doctor said that sometimes kids with neurological issues exhibit the signs earlier than NT kids. I didn't pry so I don't know the details of that doctor's opinion, but it IS something to consider.

Even for NT kids, the age between 10-16 is awkward and confusing. Your body is changing, your hormones are changing, your thoughts become more introspective and sometimes darker. Do you remember these years? I do - what a head trip!

With our kids, I think they experience the same things as NT kids but on a more intense and personal level. I believe that's what you are seeing now in your child. I'd give you the same advice I'd give any parent of a kid this age: Talk to your child, be supportive, give them extra attention, and let them know you love them no matter what.

Not sure that helped, but maybe it's a start.

i remember mine, i became more unattached, closed in my room all the time. my mother tried to bribe me to make me go out. i took a book and went for a walk to woods. but i was better than other NT kids in puberty, they caused problems, i started bringing better grades from school.

My daughter is 4 and it has become more apparent as she gets older. She is as yet undiagnosed though and may be just off the spectrum for all i really know.

I figured it was because when kids are little, being unfocused, impulsive, socially immature, etc. is NORMAL. But as my son gets older, he'll be 10 soon, he fits in less and less. It's really standing out now.

My AS stayed pretty much the same through High School. However, as the years roll by as an adult, I've learned more and more how to compensate and to appear more "neurotypical."

My daughter appears more autistic the older she gets. I don't think the severity actually has changed. It's just that the differences get more obvious. During toddlerhood when lots of NT kids are all over the place with talking, an AS kid who also has odd speech won't stick out as much. My daughter reversed pronouns for the longest time. But so did other kids. But then they grew out of it and she was still reversing pronouns so it stuck out more. And then there's kindergarten. Some NT kids will melt down and have a tough time adjusting and all that as they start kindergarten. The AS kid doesn't stick out until the melt downs continue long after the other kids have adjusted. So the AS kid is no more autistic than before but just seems so because the other kids have moved on.

For my son, I think it's a combination of "appearing" more autistic when he got older because of the range of behaviors being less tolerated when kids hit a certain age, and a real increase in "autistic-like" behaviors when he hit puberty. Part of it I attribute to hitting puberty, part of it to increased anxiety. Whenever his anxiety is high, he appears more "autistic," whatever that means. More recently, he has been less anxious, and I don't think he's appeared quite as autistic ... except for when that has translated into his feeling comfortable enough to "be himself" instead of being "appropriate," if that makes sense.

My son hasn't hit puberty yet so I can't comment on that factor but, definitely, it becomes more apparent that he is austic as he ages. It's not that the severity increases - in fact, many of his stims have disappeared - it's more that all the kids are becoming visually unique as to who they are. By age 12 you can see the athletes, and the boarders, and the scientists. The other boys his age have outgrown so many things that are normal in younger kids, and are visibly dressing and acquiring mannerisms that reflect their interests. My son doesn't really change. He likes his clothes plain and basic just as he has for years. His mannerisms are his and not mimics of his social group. And so on. And it makes him more obvious simply because the other kids are changing so much. The process starts somewhere around 3rd grade and will continue into adulthood, that the outer you starts to reflect the inner you.

I spent a childhood being told to look less autistic... they didn't know it was autism; at the time it was more, "Sit up straight! Stop fidgeting! Look at me when I'm talking to you! Would it kill you to sound like you care? Why don't you have any friends? You're pathetic!" Etc. So I spent a lot of energy trying to become what my parents wanted... Turns out I do much better when I let myself "look autistic". Since my long-overdue diagnosis, I've let a lot of those "playing normal" behaviors slide; and lo and behold, not only did I not lose anything by dropping them, I ended up lowering my stress level to the point that I am becoming more and more functional and independent even as I seem to be looking more and more autistic.

I agree also with the "raised expectations" thing. You wouldn't expect a two year old to hold a polite conversation, and you might let a six year old have a little leeway, but you definitely expect it by ten or twelve.

Interpretations of normal autistic behavior change, too. Hand flapping seems cute in a toddler, immature in a ten year old, pathological in a teenager...

Bottom line, though, it doesn't really matter how autistic you look, if you're learning and growing. There are a million things more important than just looking "normal".

Beautifully stated! I find that when people stop pushing my son to act a certain way, he might "look" more "autistic," but he tends to be much less anxious and he is much more functional. The real trick is recognizing the difference between when he is just being his normal autistic self, and when he is anxious and looking "autistic" as a response to anxiety. To the untrained (or uncaring) eye, they can look very similar; I don't care if he looks autistic - I care a lot if he's overly stressed and anxious.

This is the same for my sons. The other kids behaviours have changed to become so much more socially mature, that my sons stand out much more now than they did at a younger age.

Thanks for all the responses
I really wanted to hear everyone elses opinion, before I threw mine out there.
I love my J no matter what, to me he is who he has always been, just now he is in a new school and on anti-anxiety meds so he has dropped the charade. To me it is more balanced now.
He isnt trying to be NT when at school or we are out, he is who he is. So now we have a less anxious child at home. So rather than trying to fake it for part of the day he is, god bless him, himself all day. To be honest I think even he struggled for a little while finding his nitch in a new school that have accepted him for who he is.