Would you date a feminist?

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Very cool of you, the "Man must always pay" entitlement is really popular though:



And yes, that feeds patriarchy.

I'd like to call myself a feminist, but I can't. I have never dated a woman who made more than me. You could say that in a way I support the patriarchy.

Is it because you refuse to date a woman who makes more than you? Or is it because it happened like that by coincidence?

I wouldn't mind. It would be better because then I would know that it's not my job that she finds attractive.

It's because all women I've met weren't making much. They all were teachers, social workers, one was a painter. These aren't the most profitable careers. It's obviously not a coincidence. There's a lot more women than men in those fields. If I chose to date only women who make as much as I do, there wouldn't be anyone for me to date. Luckily, I'm a man and it's not a problem for me.

I don't see how this is a pro-patriarchy attitude, yes those jobs are common for women but this is a different story.

Pro-patriarchy attitudes would be like "I refuse to date a woman who makes more than me" / "I refuse to date a man who earns less than me" / "I refuse to let her pay because I am a man/ "I refuse to pay because I am a woman, he has to pay".

I agree with you but it's interesting to try to see this from another perspective.

Are these that different from "it just so happens that all women I date make less than me" / "it just so happens that all men I date make more than me" / "I don't mind my date to pay, but I make a lot more so I always pay" / "I don't mind dating shorter men, but it just so happens that the vast majority of men I felt attraction to were taller than me"?


There's women who consider this to be equality. Just goes to show that equality is very subjective
And then there's men who refuse their GFs to pay their share of rent, for example.

The problem is, many of those things are not cultural, rather are NT preferences. For somebody that doesn't work that way it may be easy to just say "change into something better". That would be like saying to me "stop being obsessive about people you are in love with, and start with superficial dating", or "stop being autistic". It won't work.

The best way to change it would be to create natural environments that work better and promote better gender roles. I'm afraid that online dating and globalism is the major reason why our culture is so dysfunctional in those respects. We aren't made for selecting partners among 1000s of people, and it will never work properly for anyone.

If it just happens like this yet they wouldn't mind to date someone who make less/more then this isn't a sexist mindset at all.

As for the height thing, if a woman only happens to be dating taller men because all of them are taller than her then yet has no problem to date someone of same height or shorter then this is no problem, but if she refuses to date a man who is even slightly shorter than her because she believes a boyfriend must always be taller than her then this an another thing, the latter attitude is yes...pro-patriarchy. I know a lot of women would argue against that and say this is silly and it's just uncontrollable sexual preference but I say this is BS, this is a preference that comes from a socially conditioned patriarchal perspective that it would feed it even more.

Any woman who says that I only date men who are older than me/taller than me/ makes more than me because I just feel "attraction" in that way....are guilty of being pro patriarchy and are serving patriarchy greatly, even if they deny that in million of years, because these sets of attitudes promote the idea that masculine should be more/superior while feminine should be inferior/less, it promotes the idea that a bf/husband must always be taller/stronger/older/richer than his gf/wife. No excuses.

Any man who refuses to date richer/taller/stronger/smarter women are also guilty of the same thing.




Those are pretty pro patriarchy.

So if a woman doesn't know why she prefer taller men, then she is ok, but if she had concluded based on past experience, that she has such a preference, then she becomes pro-patriarchy? That makes no sense to me.

Besides, it's a common theme in nature that males are taller and stronger than females, which is anticipated to be connected to female preferences for tall and strong males. That in itself put serious doubt about these preferences being cultural.



Makes no sense either. None of those are human-specific things, so it's highly unlikely it's part of "patriarchy". About the age preferences, it's well established that men are mostly attracted to young women, and that women prefer same age or older men. This too is obviously based in evolutionary preferences and not culture.



That's the first one that may make some sense.

This is not what I said at all, re-read.

And one always know why they have a preference for this and that, don't be naive.



So patriarchy is in our nature?



So we should accept patriarchy because it's justified naturally?



and why this is the only one that can't be explained evolutionary?

I'm curious: if I were to say "men who don't hate women are so unusual these days", would that be a sexist generalisation? If so, why is it OK to imply that most women these days hate men?

^^willburforce, no one implied here that most women hate men or even feminists hate men.

What's unusual about incrediblefrog that she recognizes that men have problems of their own - which is yeah, most women don't and many feminists actually often mock whenever they see someone talks about men problems.
They would roll their eyes and go "oh here we go again someone crying what about the menz?" or "oh no another MRA crybaby".

Most women don't recognise that men have problems too? Can you back this up with any kind of evidence, or is this just another sweeping generalisation about women? I don't even know why I bother trying to reason with you, all you ever do is make sweeping generalisations about women and then when women call you on it and provide evidence to the contrary (of which there is always plenty because most of the generalisations you make are ridiculous) you say "you're right, I concede" and then make another thread full of sweeping generalisations about women. Either you can't learn any different, or you don't want to. Either way, I'm not interested in discussing this with you. I wish you would not respond to my comments, I wasn't even quoting you or talking to you.

^ it is a sweeping generalization based on observation.
And yeah, most regular women of the general population aren't even aware of men problems because it's something not talked about in the media at all (or extremely rarely - while women problems are commonly talked about on tv and in the news) - if you interview people in the street, how many of them would be aware that men commit suicide like 4x the women in many places? And how many are aware of the emotional suppression boys go through? How many are aware than men get harsher prison sentences for the same crimes? very... very few I bet, especially the women because they have no idea how it is like to live as a man.

I guess you missed the part where I said there is no point trying to discuss this with you and your sweeping generalisations and I'm not interested in doing so.

Fortunately, I don't find that most men hate women.

At the most, they usually feel a frustration pertaining to women, a sort of befuddlement. They might wonder why women won't date THEM--a feeling I had in my teens-early 20's. They might wonder what they are doing wrong. They might wonder if they're tall enough, muscular enough, etc. They might wonder why that "special feeling" that women get don't apply to them.

The above doesn't translate into a hatred of women--unless the man's absolutely out of his mind.

I wouldn't hang out with a man who hates women. Even during the worst of my times, I never experienced even a slight dislike of women in general--though I have disliked certain women.