The appeal of online Incel communities to autistic men

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I don't know too many "Machiavellian" sorts of people. I don't go in those circles. I'm plain-spoken. I'm not planning to usurp a kingdom. Neither are most women in my circle. But then....I don't have much of a "circle." Maybe I'm not experienced enough?

There are aspects of "humanity" which are bad-----and there are aspects of "humanity" which are good. I see, and I read up on the world around me. Much of it is not good. But I don't see anything wrong with seeking pleasure in life, as long as I'm not imposing myself upon others. I'm not going to deny myself an ice cream soda because of world events. I don't believe a person in Burundi going through a hard time would think it makes sense for an American to deny his/herself an ice cream soda because of the lot of the Burundian person.

What is the "Red Queen" aspect of our biology? Never heard of that.

Make what you will of what I write. That's all I can say. I'm pretty sure I'm going to get some sort of vitriol back. But hey----that's life----you can't please the world.

We're two different people. We can't agree on everything.

↑↑ Those "statistics" seem to have been taken from YouTube videos in which people described their experiences using Tinder or other dating apps.  In reality, those "statistics" might be more equitable.  Ad-hoc "statistics" derived from personal experiences with dating apps and social media platforms should never be trusted.

There's a difference between having a reciprocal and mature dialogue, recommending mental health services with sincerity (depending on the situation or even the subforum), or being sarcastic. I don't mean you specifically Fnord. I'm just making an observation about the way some people say "seek the services of a professional" or "you need a shrink!", whether on this website or in "the real world".

This is PPR but that doesn't mean we can't still listen to each other and show respect for people's POV. A post expressing personal upset doesn't have to be in The Haven for the rest of us to demonstrate respect. This is still a support site overall, and we all have issues with interpersonal communication. We all feel alienated from society to some extent, which is even reflected in the name "wrong planet".

In my opinion members should be able to discuss their point of view on topics which are political, religious, or philosophical without being invalidated or having others suggest their feelings are wrong. Statistics and data can be wrong, of course.
Our emotional response to that data might even be "wrong" on some level, but we should still be kind to one another and have patience when addressing another person's feelings about alienation. As we've learned yet again (in Texas), the result of invalidation can be disastrous, especially for those who feel unheard.

Debate is very common in this subforum but it's still a place for learning about different points of view pertaining to politics, religion, and philosophy. I've seen this same topic in The Haven over the years and unfortunately members have been mocked and bullied there as much as they've been roasted elsewhere. The climate in The Haven is much better now so I agree it's a safer place for sharing emotional pain. That doesn't mean people can't discuss the socio-political aspects of incel in PPR, or that they can't still have an emotional reaction either way.

Of course I don't want to see women mischaracterised and judged by any group of people. Likewise I don't want to see people who feel disenfranchised from society being mischaracterised or judged by people who brush them aside or jump to conclusions about their intent. Education comes through learning and appreciating other people's point-of-view whether we agree with it or not. That doesn't always need to culminate in an argument, or sending someone to psychiatry.

I think this thread seems like it's started a good dialogue and people are beginning to have more of a meaningful conversation, instead of panicking when they see the word "Incel".

To be clear I wasn't mad at you as a person, rather I just saw something happening - you were getting high on your own supply and censorious (you said it yourself that you were 'censoring') on a topic that admitted made no sense to you, and you tied it with a bow when you then said you were fighting against lack of 'critical thinking'. At least one out of the three doesn't belong with the others otherwise it's a self-sealed disaster.

My whole point was to say that what MGTOW and red pill are is dumbed down or sexed-up (commercially speaking) evolutionary psychology, ie. it's 'pop' evolutionary psychology sold to the crowd most likely to buy it.

I also lay no claim to know what your experiences are and I wasn't trying to belittle them. I was just confused when you were constantly pulling the discussion off topic to talk about my relationship life and status. That seemed to strongly suggest that if I was in a relationship I wouldn't be seeing any of this, and then you kept along the same line of reasoning - it isn't something that I needed to stretch or misrepresent.

Whether I like or dislike people on here I'm still calling them out on things like this. Technically if I like someone I'm probably more likely to call them out because I usually have some faith that they actually care deep down whether their participation in a thread is up to their own standards.

I sort of gave it to Pepe a week ago in a different thread when I felt I was getting a loaded reaction on a given topic. I don't hate him either, I was just dealing with the situation in real time.

The whole thing is:

What you were "calling me out" on----wasn't something that I was doing.

I believe you had mentioned that you were having difficulty sustaining relationships, so I alluded to that. I don't judge people on how they "sustain relationships." I didn't "sustain" many myself.

I still don't believe those ideologies are viable to my situation. They don't work for me. They're based on some truth---but I find that pushing headlong into a belief in these ideologies would stymie me, ultimately.

To be fair it seems you admittedly didn't realize you were doing it, it's just that you did it three or four times almost in a row (shifting the conversation to 'you'll be able to find someone' when it had no relationship to what you were quoting).


I didn't say much about that, just that I was finding that building the sort of rapport I'd need with the people around me to even get my environments working - let alone date in those environments - wasn't working well because quite often they weren't the types of people I could build that rapport with, and I was making the argument that there's a lot complexity to this for the guys involved. Clearly it's much better, if they've gotten stuck in a bitter place, to find a way out of that place but I don't necessarily think they need to stop believing what's true in order to do that.

I think with MGTOW, ie. Men Going Their Own Way, it was sort of like 'Oh, they're talking about what I've already been doing for years' - ie. just working on myself, living my own life, and not selling myself short. Some of the guys never stop talking about women and IMHO they're rather boring because if a guy is doing that - IMHO - they're still stuck on women and they didn't do such a hot job of 'going their own way'.

Some posters from back then are gone, and other people have replaced them?

I feel excluded.

I want to join an online incel community.

I am happy being the "Omega man" fighting the hoards of mutants in society.

That could be fun - specifying identity as a female incel, explicitly, not a femcel.

That does make me wonder as well if there's an LGBTQ+ equivalent, it would be an interesting perspective.

Yes, exactly. I’m an openly female incel.

Which is the best online incel community? I’m not interested in a second-rate one.

Last edited by TwilightPrincess on 25 May 2022, 8:20 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I'd laugh *myself* "off the stage".
I did it for a girlfriend, once, but only as a joke.
She was disappointed that I didn't continue the act. lol

My beta male looked like this.

He was a pretty good kisser.

FIIK. I don't do that.

That’s disappointing.

Agreed.
Life is more complicated than some people think.