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techstepgenr8tion
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15 Nov 2009, 10:53 am

Long-term happiness is a situation that you create within yourself by understanding how your mind works, coming to terms with as many things in life that you can, and taking that a step further to appreciate what you have more than what you don't. Its really an adjustment issue much more than a mood reaction to stimuli - I think of the later either joy or glee which are both temporary and fleeting.



leejosepho
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15 Nov 2009, 12:40 pm

techstepgenr8tion wrote:
Its really an adjustment issue much more than a mood reaction to stimuli ...


Yes, and a bit like (or related to) contentment:

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Contentment, n. (Webster)
Content; a resting or satisfaction of mind without disquiet; acquiescence.
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NarcissusSavage
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15 Nov 2009, 3:00 pm

I've attained near complete happiness.

You must find something that makes you happy, that can exist in your life 100% of the time. If you do so, you will always be happy.

For me, it's mastery of myself. Self control gives me a sense of happiness, knowing that I am doing what I want to do when I want to do it. I do not allow external influences to alter my own image of who I am, and follow through with my course action regardless of the consequence.

While this might seem counter intuitive, seeing as there are lots of times when I intentionally do something that will cause myself pain or discomfort, it is a source of happiness that can never be taken from me. I am in 100% control of myself, and thus my behavior and deeds are my source for the fuzzy feel goods.

It requires a healthy amount of discipline and self-awareness though. And constant conscious reinforcement. Well worth it in my opinion.

~NS

If you're interested more about the basic concepts, do an internet search on Stoicism. That's the philosophy from which I've taken these ideas.


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techstepgenr8tion
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15 Nov 2009, 3:04 pm

This is a short read but should make just as much sense regardless of one's religious inclinations of lack thereof. Short read and very inexpensive used on Amazon, dead-aim in its content however:

Image



MissConstrue
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15 Nov 2009, 4:43 pm

True happiness is from having lot's of dopamine which is something I lack. If you're like me and have the inablity to "feel" happy even amidst the happiest moments then you may be NEED Effexor!

Warning: Side effects may include Anxiety; blurred vision; changes in taste; constipation; decreased sexual desire or ability; dizziness; drowsiness; dry mouth; flushing; headache; increased sweating; loss of appetite; nausea; nervousness; stomach upset; trouble sleeping; vomiting; weakness; weight loss; yawning.

Ask your doctor if this option is right for you... :wink:


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techstepgenr8tion
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15 Nov 2009, 4:54 pm

Effexor is both dopamine and serotonin - gave me horrible side effects. I can say that I was on risperidal, put on it by the psych that my parents had me seeing from 11 through 19, had horrible akasthesia (pretty much restless body syndrome - 24/7 rather than just at night), I took myself off of that thanks to having good friends who were knowledgeable enough to persuade me that the risperidal was zombifying me; I think I actually matured much slower during that time, thought I'd be in assisted living by my twenties, perhaps would be if I was still on it. Even after quitting though I needed to take ritalin for a while to bring my balance up to par, it hung pretty low for a while.

The trick to stabilizing mood swings though and removing depression just seems to be having better and better accuracy in assessing exactly what this existence is, what it isn't. Throwing the fairy-tales that I was given as a kid out the window were vital though, because if I still saw myself as a victim of society and felt like my life hadn't been 'done to me' that things would be far better - I'd probably be in a casket right now, not knowing yourself or having your emotions grounded in something stable is an extremely bipolar existence and I've found that I'd much rather have a generally glum take on reality that's not easily phased and where the small bits of good that I do see around me absolutely astound and astonish me rather than feel like the world should be better and be vulnerable to being stunned by everything out there to the contrary.

If someone has a chemical imbalance and medication ends up being more help than side effects then its a great idea. Past that though, people really need to pay attention to this and avidly avoid confusing happiness for physical/chemical pleasure.



MissConstrue
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15 Nov 2009, 5:05 pm

I have to say I have about 5 or 6 of those side effects.

Most of my happiness came for the consumption of alcohol and meth. Glad I'm off those now but that was my idea of what it was like to feel "happy" or "normal".


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techstepgenr8tion
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15 Nov 2009, 6:05 pm

MissConstrue wrote:
Most of my happiness came for the consumption of alcohol and meth. Glad I'm off those now but that was my idea of what it was like to feel "happy" or "normal".


Alcohol for me has seemed to cut both ways. I get sensory overload pretty bad when my friends take me out to the warehouse district, at worst that usually just has me wide-eyed and lock jawed to where I just end up holding up the wall a bit too much if I'm dead sober, drinking helped in situations where I had someone that I could hold a steady conversation with, otherwise though its just seemed like a numbed version of the first thing - me wide eyed, lock-lipped, holding up the wall or a space next to one of my friends (I see them weaving in and out, chatting people up, I can do that but never with the sort of self-propelled agenda that they can).

As for meth, I consider myself lucky in that I had a situation where I got to a three day party with no sleep (general insomnia), wanted to stay up to see the dj's I came to see, my friends said they had aderol but they were out, I'd never tried meth but it seemed like a decent last-resort. Aside from feeling like I'd had a few cups of coffee I had no special effects, didn't even make my gums tingle like coke did. To tell the truth I fell asleep on it. I'm actually quite lucky on both accounts though because if it does a lot for someone it can be a heck of a habit to break.

I'm glad to hear that you were able to cut all of this out, I still like to have a drink or two at night - mainly because my mind has historically been in a state of constantly judging where I am right now, how things are going, where I may have socially slipped recently, what I've achieved and what I haven't, for a long time it was one of the few ways that I could get away from myself in that sense. Even at that though, especially in the past six months or so, I'm starting to come to terms with things a lot better. It seems like the 20's are years that we really spend taking it to the limits and figuring out who we are, who we can and can't be, what we can and can't be, once that's gone it seems like the inner bully finds less of a place to grind us because we know our parameters and it becomes almost irrational not to make peace with our world once we know what our limits and confines are. That gives me the sense that, even if I may not specifically 'get' the things I had ambitiously hoped for in my thirties that it will still be a much happier time than my twenties were (which on their own were heaven compared to my teen years).



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18 Nov 2009, 5:57 pm

bonez wrote:
What is the meaning of true happiness? If it's not having alot of money or having alot of friends, what is true happiness? How can one become truly happy?


i realised i was thinking a little about this thread .. and feeling a post forming in the mind ..

one thing first. i feel doing a post is potentially very costly for me. not entirely clear myself as to why. i feel both writing, publishing (posting it) and also the potential reactions to it are things that might easily be pretty emotionally costly to me. so my first issue is: can i afford (emotionally) to do a post? if so, how?

so this is both an attempt at just saying out loud a very few different things i've explored that i feel are to do with happiness for me personally. but it is not least an experiment for myself in trying to determine if and how i can do a post that's not too costly. maybe that's too ambitious a plan to be realistic .. ??

what struck me thinking about this is that i use the "let go" principle a lot. i think my main inspiration is a book called Returning to silence by D. Katagiri. A Zen master.

my understanding (small) of this is that emptiness is truth. empty yourself and you obscure truth (Reality) less. And that makes you happier. and to my mind it is a very powerful principle. i use it all thie time albeit imperfectly. he's also for instance saying: if you find Truth, let it go. like you can't "keep" it anyway .. (implying maybe the search is the crucial component)

Christianity just came to me. felt a need to approach it and it worked. lots of thoughts on that .. but maybe too personal as of yet ..

what little i know f the chakra system is to my mind also powerful stuff. working through chakras 1 - 7 is extremely fascinatng stuff. but the books on it varies a lot!! it can mean almost anything it seems .. my personal fav is the "The Hero within" by Pearson. it is a Jungian take on chakras. and only 6 levels are discussed. but to my mind in a very nice and user-friendly way. keeps affecting me a lot.

i was once in contact with a person that was a bit of a guru for me. she was initiated by a guru herself and she and me never had a formal guru relationship. but nonetheless i was very deeply affected by her teaching and example. her way of discussing was talking about the Path of Love .. and to realize Love .. which i still feel is crucially important stuff for myself.

ok, these are what first came to me. .. and also this: therapy made me recall dreams. that made me read on dreams which ade me "meet Jung" .. and i feel working my dreams in his tradition is also a lot to do with what happiness i find ..


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