The problem of SJWs

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But my private conversations with my friends are yours? Besides, you're the one who claimed that he doesn't have any experience with gender uncertainty, or have any friends who do, in the same post condemning people who judge out of ignorance; it would be pretty hypocritical for you to make that post if you didn't know for sure that your judgment of him was correct.

Indeed. I'm astounded by the levels of egocentric ignorance of such people.

that's an assumption


i'm not judging people's motivations for their attitudes, i'm judging their attitudes. the motivations may make it understandable but they don't make it right. and many people have that exact attitude without having gender issues, just like many people have gender issues without having that attitude. and those who have that attitude harm those who don't, because then it gets associated with "all of them", as if it's a monolithic group, when one thing is actually not tied to the other. because people who don't want to be associated with that will simply try to not draw attention to themselves and try not to identify or be associated with that group

This is lost on so many people. I see daily examples of people using tenuous justifications for their objectionable behaviour and (much worse in my opinion) being encouraged by their peers to do greater and greater harm to both themselves and others.

The fact that you thought it necessary to explain this only serves to highlight the problem.

You are the one who brought up your transgender friends and what you talk about with them. I did not invite you to ask about my personal communications with other members of this forum or their content. It was an assumption based on our conversations as well as his posts, and I will apologise if he corrects my assumption.

You're the one who accused me of being transphobic, due to a poor understanding of my posts no less.



You insulted people who judge out of ignorance, while making an ignorant, judgmental statement; that kind of invites questioning.

I don't understand what you mean here. All I know is that I understand what it is to be sensitive about an issue one can't control (like being transgender) because one has been mocked and attacked for it for years and I sympathise with that. I have spoken with several transgender members of this forum and it makes me sad to see this kind of open mockery of things like the difficulty with pronouns in our language due to gender identity. Language is complex and complicated, but it really doesn't hurt to have a thought for people who suffer because of the complexity behind things like gendered pronouns. I know you guys don't see it as suffering and think it is therefore worthy of mockery, but I wonder if you would feel the same way if you had ever had to struggle with that issue yourself, and had people continuously misgendering you and mocking you (or even physically attacking you, which is very common for transgender people) for not fitting into the limiting binary that our limited language and culture demands.

Some trans people don't really care about pronouns, that is certainly true--but many do, and I don't see why it's so wrong to have a thought for that and to try not to openly mock people for struggling with a complex problem like pronoun usage and the various different ways it can negatively impact many trans people's lives. Talk about the issue, absolutely--but if we can't do it without mocking vulnerable people then we're doing something wrong.

I really don't wish to devote any more time to talking with you on this subject, Dox. You are aggressively unpleasant and it just gets tiresome. And go ahead and say whatever you like about me "running away"--but having a conversation with you always leaves a bad aftertaste and that tells me it's just not worth it. Most of the time I stay out of this particular sub-forum, and since it is a favourite of yours I will be considerate of you and continue to do so.

You know wilbur, it must be exhausting always being on the lookout for ways to make people out to be bigots, and then explaining to them how you know their thoughts and motives better than they do; maybe you should give it a rest.

i mean what i said. the reason why someone does something i don't agree with might make me more inclined to sympathize with them and make an exception for them, but not if they paint me as an aggressor and demand something. which resembles my experience of the world at large, as someone with neurological issues

i've been misunderstood my entire life. i've been accused of being insensitive so many times because of misunderstandings, i don't even care anymore. being expected to constantly think of other people's problems when i can't even take care of my own is a huge burden. people look at me and i seem okay, so they assume i'm okay and start expecting tons of things from me. but that's because of years of learning how to blend in (which never ceases to be a huge effort), because of things like being called gay all the time when i'm actually not

no matter what i do, i'll be misunderstood. i got used to it. and i got used to the fact that it's nobody's fault. people have their own problems. i can't expect them to understand and sympathize with mine, especially if i piss them off, which does happen sometimes. and i can't pretend to know or understand theirs. so who's right? well that's a matter of negotiating. no one is inherently right. so there are people who suffer because not everybody around them is thinking of their woes. okay. and i suffer because everybody wants me to think of their woes. all else being equal, i am myself and i am not them, therefore my perspective prevails

i am the foreign element in this world. it sucks, but i have to deal with it. i'm still better off than billions of random people in the world and i'm thankful to them for that schadenfreude. like i said, everybody's interests conflict with everybody else's to some extent. that's just a fact of nature. everyone would do themselves a favor if they simply acknowledged it. more often than not, blame is something completely imagined. or, if it's not, it's still in your best interest to think beyond blame. there are times when it's hard to do it, but that's not something to be encouraged, it's just a human flaw


well the mockery is something i wouldn't do (not in public contexts at least). i'm normally not involved in these kinds of debates, and that's on purpose, because i know no good could come out of me actually expressing my opinions on certain things, so i just keep them to myself. "some cultural systems are incompatible with others", like i said. those sensitive/reactive people are like a wasps nest to me. easily disturbed or even crushed by accident, but... they'll react. and i can't complain if they do. better just keep my distance

This is fairly close to my own operating philosophy, which is to generally be agreeable and not assume that other people are doing things out of malice, and to realize that everyone has their own issues to deal with, which means I shouldn't inflict mine on them if it's not absolutely necessary. If anything, I tend to be too agreeable day to day, and often get disappointed that my efforts to get along with others are not reciprocated on the rare occasion I do have a real issue.

At least until the ram touches the wall. Then all bets are off.

I'm seriously thinking of having that tattooed on me, it's very appropriate to how I actually conduct myself, being the nicest guy in the world who also happens to be armed to the teeth at all times and all. I came across the phrase hanging around law blogs of all places, apparently lawyers use the phrase to mean "settle or else".

It is a semi-semi safe space at most. Non autistic people are allowed and encouraged to belong.

Ironically, I think the social justice people this thread was created to discuss are more of a threat to this being a "safe space" for autistics than the neurotypicals are. That whole ideology is obsessed with parsing statements looking for signs of bias, and this is a support site for people with a communications disorder who don't always put things delicately, not exactly a harmonious mix.