Your thoughts dont define reality...otherwise you would be crazy.
But the world, the universe, has a logical consistancy, and we as humans, have a working perceptual model of it. As individuals, we have our own working model as well, and the degree to which it correlates to reality(as defined by other people and our physical needs), determines how functional we are.
Now because most of us are just average human beings, not as far south as full blown psychosis, we can assume that our operational view point of reality can be improved.
Because we are thinking and rational beings, we can accept or refute ideas that are contrary to successful operations in our daily lives. Getting up for work or school when you would rather stay in bed is a good example of this.
Same with elements of depression, or your choice of words to other people. At least to some degree, your motivations, your choice of actions determines what you get out of life. While I understand that somethings are beyond our control, some proactive shaping on our parts will influence the future.
Ways that you may improve your yourself include an assumption of positive outcome, determination to succeed, achievement of better education, and yes, sometimes a little naivete.
Its a little like in martial arts where they tell you to punch past the target. Nobody expects that you will go right through, but aiming past your target insures that you are making full effort.
In this way, we can say that our thoughts shape our reality. In theory, it IS possible that we can define our own reality, and be ultra successful at elements of it, because we might have a clearer vision of reality, but there would be some degree of disconnect with the populace at large.
Sounds like AS, doesnt it?
This is an outstanding issue with some of the older aspies. We didnt have that label attached to us, as it didnt exist. We were simply ecentric. Do you see that the older aspies are happier people? We define ourselves and our approaches to our difficulties differently than you younger ones. We see, perhaps unfairly, that you have been raised in a culture of victimhood, told that there are certain things you cannot do....
I'm getting off track. Let me use a concrete real world example for you.
A local deaf man wanted to become a truck(lorry) driver. He was able to master the skills needed to drive. He failed his written exam because he had been educated at a school for the deaf, and they did not emphasis written/verbal skills. While it certainly wasnt his fault that he didnt have the skills he needed, His range of thought and education defines his reality.
That was harsh of me. How can I word it better? In essence, as a child, he was told "there are things you cannot do, so we are going to remove your exposure to them". But that negates the fact that he might very well have been able, if only with more effort. Didnt Hellen Keller learn to speak even though she was deaf and blind?
So we older aspies worry that you have been paid a great diservice, that by giving you an easier childhood, you have been robbed of some of the enjoyment of adulthood.
Do you see what I mean?