I have issues with feminism

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I know this is going to be controversial, but I don't care. I don't care if this thread gets deleted or if I even get banned. I need to get this off my chest:

Feminism is not about gender equality; its about man-hating! The existence of #killallmen proves this.

If anyone were to create #kill all (any group aside from straight cis men), it would be deleted immediately and the creator would be banned from the platform. But #killallmen is allowed to trend and thrive on multiple social media platform including Twitter, TikTok, Instagram, and others.

Why did you post this in the Haven , it would be a better discussion in PPR.

You won't find #killallmen here on WP unless it's in jest

I guess the admins can move it if appropriate.

Any why do you think its acceptable in jest? Since when do we excuse hate speech just because it hides behind humor?

No, feminism is about asserting equal rights for women.

"#killallmen" is an extremist website that does not represent the entire feminist movement -- it represents only a few women (or men posing as women) to stir up female hatred toward men, and male hatred toward women.

If only one example is representative of all persons of one sex, then just one example of misogyny by just one man means that all men are misogynous.

One man does not represent all men, and one woman does not represent all women.

Please re-assess your "privileged" male status.

Misogyny is not a joking matter; and calling offending offensive speech a "joke" does not make it funny.

Hate speech and poking fun at hate speech are not the same thing.

If the OP has posted in the Haven, and we are trying to be supportive in the Haven, this does present some incongruency.

I would guess, and I could be wrong, the OP has some anger issues regarding women and this anti-feminism rant is speaking out of that pain.

As aspies, we can’t always, or even sometimes identify the emotion or the reason for it.

OP: it does sound like you are expressing hate speech. And the mods should probably lock this thread. I would encourage you to look behind your words and anger. See what you find there.

To Fnord and Ferris, I agree with both of you. You have made good points. I hope the OP can think on them.

What does that make you saying re-assess your privileged male status sarcastically?

^ It wasn't sarcasm, I think I know Fnord's posting style enough to deduce that.

#killallmen is not a website. It is hashtag that started on Twitter and expanded to other mainstream social media platforms, without the admins of any of those platforms blinking an eye.



I'd like to clarify that I am talking about feminists, not women. I have been bullied and abused by both female and male feminists, including an incident that occurred while I was homeless (and they knew it), and at one point leading me to near suicide. Which, by the way, is why I thought the Haven was an appropriate place to post this. But apparently I'm not deserving of support or compassion since my abusers were feminists and I'm a "privileged" male.

And apparently feminists can plaster and shout "kill all men" all across social media without challenge. But when I object, I'm the one the expressing hate speech.

Accusing all of feminism -- and therefore, all feminists -- of lethal misandry because of one Twitter hashtag (thanks for the correction, btw) deserves to be called out as hate speech.

Abusing The Haven to post hate speech against feminists should be against The Rules, if it isn't already.

You said you objected to #killallmen , I didn't disagree with you , I said you would not find it on this forum i.e a safe place. Being bullied and abused is not nice , I have sympathy for you , what makes you think it was because of feminism though? Sometimes people are just sh***y.

No feminists here on this forum are saying those things.

I understand that the roots of feminism started as fighting for equal rights. But it seems to have largely developed into an "us vs them" group think mentality. I understand that this attitude isn't true of all feminists, but its become widespread among feminist media far beyond just a fringe minority. And I've often observed it in my personal experiences with feminists as well.

Examples include the panel of a popular women's talk show making jokes and laughing about a man who's wife mutilated his genitals, generating quotes like "that'll teach him" and "its really quite fabulous." A cringe-worthy Buzzfeed "36 Questions for Men" video that gave us gems like "how does it feel to be the same gender as Donald Trump?" College professors and journalists writing articles with titles like "Why I'm completely justified in hating you." Outrage over International Men's Day, and the aforementioned #killallmen. Also, are you at all familiar with the SCUM Manifesto?

As for my personal experience, I'll give the example of the time I was dogpiled and bullied on FB by a group of male feminists for holding the horribly misogynist position that men aren't magically immune to hardship, at a time in my life when I was homeless. Even after I thoroughly explained that I'm on the spectrum, separated from my family, struggling with mental illness, unemployed, and homeless; they continued to persist that I need to "check my privilege" and had the audacity to tell me that my problems were my own fault for being lazy and not holding a job.

I'd also like to bring up the infamous feminist strategy of strawmaning any and all criticism as being misogyny and hate speech in order to silence it, much like Fnord and Blazingstar are doing in this very thread.

I still believe that the core principles of feminism are valid and relevant. But it seems that the feminist community as a whole has gone off the deep end and is meandering in group think. I think the feminist community needs to take a step back and reevaluate its trajectory.

Last edited by dorkseid on 11 Aug 2020, 8:33 pm, edited 3 times in total.

I'm sorry if misunderstood what you said. I was never talking specifically about anyone on WP.

i've seen and heard the types of things you're talking about. it's very sad and distressing...
extremes are in all groups just stay away from it..

people don't always change extreme views like that mutilation thing u mentioned (which i see too!) by explanations. they might by example. anyway, losing your peace of mind isn't worth it. the world is full of issues. if u have ASD of any type or any type of overlap with things like OCD or something.. you might phrase urself incorrectly to their sensibilities too, and that could explode.

but i really have seen what you're talking about.
also really horrible things being mainstream

like people saYING XYZ random man should be 'raped' or something horrible like that -- because of something like you said (about men also experiencing hardship) or the political party they support, or something they said about their wife didn't cook what they wanted- omg how can u not like it and how dare u have her cook and why... it becomes a spiral..
disproportionate vitriol.. it's really scary..
online at least, in forums it seems like it's acceptable to say some really awful things.. dogpile like u said. saw it with twitter -twitter trains ur mind to become psychopathic in my opinion.. not criminally. but no nuance, little empathy, consideration, etc, very short information bytes and little area for discernment etc..

it's a very unhealthy platform;..over time... i told my brother to stop using it but basically he has no friendship interactions except twitter...
i do check his twitter from time to time (because i dont want him to interact with any kind of horrible people esp as his twitter is all about anti terrorism and politics, history) but thankfully he has a wide range of people he interacts with and they seem to have very balanced, nuanced conversations even if they just keep having to tweet a dozen times.. so that's good at least.


also people applauding little boys being groomed to table top dance and horrifying things like that, my sister showed me horrible things like that..

where really its that the parents are making money off them nothing to do with freedom. and little girls too.. and in all countries weird things like that happen..


lots of horrible things in this world.. people go to extremes..everywhere..
i guess it's easier to be extreme than moderate..

also often people spurt stuff they wouldn't dare say, think orfee genuinely l in real life

dont think about it ---

is my advice.. it's just too much.


unless u have a way of changing an extreme person's mind actively .. but if you don't have a way..
try to focus on other things.. please (my advice) ..


also a lot of people are going through a 'phase' in life --or indirectly expunging some bad experiences, online - by directing their rage -
and how can we know anyone's motives ?

it's way too confusing and horrifying to glimpse the dark side of seemingly normal people's minds.

so it's not worth it.. because idk about u but

when im confused about why someone is saying something --or how can they--or it makes no sense what they say--

i spend so much energy thinking about it (mulling it over) without being able to control that...
it also affects my day to day functioning

so reducing my exposure to those things is healthier..