Is Sexual Orientation Actively Changable?

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Some people seem to think you can choose your sexuality to be whatever you want it to be WHENEVER..... and change it at will

Without arguing definitions....

Do you feel this is the case?

Is sexuality like being Bipolar?

Or are we who we are....


Me?

I'm straight... i have some gay-ish feelings sometimes... and am put off by sex often....

but NEVER NEVER NEVER, have i been anything but straight

Last edited by Sedaka on 13 Aug 2007, 6:30 pm, edited 1 time in total.

i convinced that if i grew up in a better home and wasnt so torrmented in schools that i wouldnt have such an identity crisis on my hands now. i probably would have been %100 streight instead of %50

I tried to change my sexuality for years, and it didn't work. So, no. Not for me. And I doubt many people can, although I don't know that no one can. Unlike some ret*ds, I don't claim to know everything about other people's sexuality.

I believe your sexuality (who you are) is not a choice, the choice is about your actions, what you do. Yeah Ragtime would say "that is what I have been telling you about" but he doesn't actually believe in sexual orientation, he thinks someone chooses to go "against nature" for whatever reason, while it IS part of your nature.

Still, wether you choose to act upon it or not, you have defined your sexual orientation, is part of you you are, even if someone never experience sex due to disability or by choosing not too.

I believe there are some things that appears that it may be by choice, but is just appereance in my opinion and therefore the misconception.

Some people may argue about prison, homosexuality by choice, well apparently it might be like that to some people, notice that this is about rape, sexual urges and power. I don't think there are two people kissing in their mouths, consenting of course, if they were straight before, no one falls in love there either, if they were straight in the first place. So that argument really doesn't apply.

Another thing, some people argue that why until a person is a certain age, they realise that the are gay, wouldn't that person know before? well, some people get confused, due to how society and their environment works around them, they try to convince themselves to be straight, and therefore the confusion, until later they realised they don't have to deny it anymore, another thing some pretend to be straight

Another thing that it seems to be a choice for some, is about a few who sleep with the same sex as well with the opossite, which they are Bisexual.

As there are people who are 100% straight, which they are gross out with the though of doing the same sex, there are 100% gay people who are the same on this. Never had an attraction to the opossite sex and are gross about it, just as a straight guy would be with other men for example.

So I believe is part of the person and not exactly a choice, in my opinion.

Something that some may argue and that it could be consider a choice would be something like this, for example: what would happen if for any cosmic reason, let's just say a physical or space phenomemon goes to earth (scifi? lol) and one gender is erradicated from earth, and we only have one, I assume that it would be part of nature to adjust or to adapt to the new way of life, (darwin thoery perhaps) so all would have no other than to be gay, if that would be the case, it would look like a choice, but I think it must be nature adapting human beings. I suppose it would be like that.

Even though, a lot of poeple are born gay, and that's a fact. I think that might be a possiblity that some might turn gay after they are born, something in the environment during early childhood perhaps, I don't discard that possiblity, that doesn't mean it is by choice though. I don't believe there is a person who deliberately chooses to "follow that path" <-- (notice that I am using quotes), knowing the social stigma is, and what that person can suffer from belonging to a minority.

Even having an experiment, is not enough to consider one gay or bi officialy. If Ragtime was doing a experiment therefore he says "forced gay", he feels forced because that is not his sexual orientation, so anyone who wants to try that and doesn't have the attraction, it would feel forced, so probably what Ragtime did, if he actually did some kind of experiment he just proves that he is wrong.

Fagtime hates women.

i know that environment may play some role while you're developing....

and that's one thing... but it's quite another to be fully mature and to actively go back and forth between what you're attracted to...

if you're so easily swayed.... then you're bi or pan or w/e

the lamest thing he has said yet was that he attained asexuality....

as astounding as it is to choose the object of your sexual attraction... i sincerely doubt he abolished it... to make himself temporarily asexual


it's not that transient

Well, it's necessary to argue definitions in this matter. For example, how could you be straight while you were enjoying the "powerful" feeling of kissing women you described? I think that, just as emotions vary, sometimes you can be straighter than at other times. If you're a happy person, does that mean you always have to be happy? Of course not -- it varies.

Being straight is a decision I've made, because my will has control over what I find attractive. Just as those spiritual among us can curb our own lust through a devine power, so can I decide not to like men and to like women exclusively. This is not a natural, but a spiritual power from God. Just like I can decide not to steal $1,000 cash I see that belongs to someone else, while another man might say he "can't resist" taking it, so can I decide that lust for a man is folly, and turn my desires away from that. I won't pretend that by flesh and blood this is possible; it's only by supernatural might that this is done. Mind over matter, spirit over flesh.

The static-sexuality view is quaint, easier to understand, and much more comfortable to believe, but I think it to be a simplistic tool for boxing people into convenient catagories using labels, and therefore hardly a progressive view. It's nothing but stereotyping, like the old "men are men so they're this way, and women are women so they're that way", except it uses "gay", "bi", "asexual", "straight", and a few more labels which are supposed to totally define people. I think it's a compartmentalizing system which is theoretical in nature, and fails to capture the realities of sexual identity.

you're skewing my words...... i compared it to the power one must feel in raping someone... rape is about power...

the attraction i have is different... not that i find them sexually arousing even... i like it when women hit on me... ya... it's powerful

I voted yes. You could feasibly do it via hypnosis, if you could find someone with the skill and a subject had the will to do so.

The asexual one wasn't a choice -- it just happened. I felt very, very asexual, for several weeks each time. Sex just seems stupid and pointless to me a lot of the time, so it's no wonder that such a viewpoint would quell my desire for it.

And what is this "if you're so easily swayed.... then you're bi or pan or w/e"? Why the labels? Why am I not just "swayed", as you put it? There's no call for an "If, then" function. I am what I am, not some label.

I can CHOOSE whether to be
happy or not?

Damn. How do I do this?



I don't know, as to the basic
question. I THINK that I could
change my sexual tastes by
focusing heavily. All that I can
say is that I have added desires
through thinking about them or
in order to please.

I have no particular wish to be
with a male, but the thought doesn't
disturb me. Rather like I feel about
unattractive (to me) females. Or animals.
Or yogurt.

These things might pop into my mind, as
in, "how would that yogurt feel after nuking
it?" But I can't really say that I have an attraction
to the yogurt, per say. A bit of curiosity.

BUT, if I worked really hard at it, I think that
I could develop a real desire for any of these.
Just as I can induce delusions.

I like strawberry and raspberry yogurts.

I'm referring to "happy" as a momentary emotion. And surely you know several ways of accomplishing that.

That's how I've done it -- by increasing my empathy toward the other individual.


The key concept is acquired taste: a taste you don't have at first, but after practice you do.

Well I, for one, am not going to go and endure sex with people I don't want to sleep with, in tha hope that I might one day like them. Nor should anyone else, unless they actually want to.

No. No I don't. Any more than I can
figure out how to use the god damned
phone, and try and end up not living
on the street.

I DO think that I might be able to acquire
a sexual attraction to just about anything
though. Given that I managed one towards
blood - something which I had always been
repulsed by.





Sure. Likewise, I think that I could make myself
disgusted by what I see as beautiful.

Still doesn't make me happy.

But look at this. I'm pretty f****d
up. Maybe you are too. Most people
don't seem to think that they could.

Don't assume that you understand their
minds better than they do.

We don't all have to be open minded, I guess. Just those of us who see a benefit to it.