Banning loud children from restaurants, airplanes
That sounds annoying as hell, I forgot that you'd been behind the stick before, that can be a great gig or a pretty rough one depending on the spot. For me, all the really stupid problems actually happened when I worked at a delivery restaurant, people would do stuff like call the cops because they tried to scam free food from us and we wouldn't give it to them.
Liability being what it is in the UK, I have been in the unfortunate position of having to control (or request control of) other peoples children. That or see the venue get sued into the floor. This on top of having to deal with my bosses ill-mannered bratty kids run roughshod around the establishment like they owned the place. Tact helps A LOT, but there is no safe way of doing it really. Ironically the best behaved kids in the venue were mine, and they're both autistic.
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"There is a time when the operation of the machine becomes so odious, makes you so sick at heart,
that you can't take part" [Mario Savo, 1964]
sartresue
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Shhhhh topic
I find I can tune out the noise better in a store than in my own house. I would be upset in an aircraft, as there is no ready excape.
Not much you can do at 25 thousand kilometers up.
That being said, a quick word to a store employee can do the trick. I usually feel sorry for the parents, believe it or not. Having to deal with Junior's meltdown is no easy task. I would take my kids out if they had tantrums in a place like Wal-mart or Price Chopper.
I have seen parents try to ignore a meltdown. It does not work.
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Radiant Aspergian
Awe-Tistic Whirlwind
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NOT a believer of Mystic Woo-Woo
Kids need to learn how to use their "inside voice". Just because a child is happy is no excuse to let them scream and squeal.
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I'm not weird, you're just too normal.
I assume we were all infants and children at some stage before now. I was a kid once, and a difficult one at that.
This is what I tell myself when I want to scream at parents with noisy kids. I will never take out my discomfort on the parents, it's not their fault. Nor is it the fault of the kids who are doing what kids do naturally. I avoid eye contact with infants and children because they do not need to see how I feel about them.
Avoid the places where you know there are triggers for your HSD or make a choice to be more tolerant.
Kids need to learn how to use their "inside voice". Just because a child is happy is no excuse to let them scream and squeal.
Do you find a child's laughter as repellent? That can get pretty loud as well.
_________________
"There is a time when the operation of the machine becomes so odious, makes you so sick at heart,
that you can't take part" [Mario Savo, 1964]
When I was a kid a lot of movie theaters and churches had a "crying room" at the back where mothers with crying babies could see the show through a thick glass window.
As for restaurants then fair is fair. If kids yell in MacDonalds or Pizza Hut then so be it.
If we are talking about a fancy restaurant where the soup costs $20 then they probably should not allow anyone under 14 years old to even be allowed in.
Kids need to learn how to use their "inside voice". Just because a child is happy is no excuse to let them scream and squeal.
Do you find a child's laughter as repellent? That can get pretty loud as well.
Actually yes. My parents were always yelling at me for being "too loud" and I was often loud becuase I was excited. My parents also claimed they needed brakes from me talking. I guess I'm screwed up. My perfect, NT neice was ALWAYS talking and really loud sometimes, she would even drive me into sensory overload meltdowns but she was never told my parents needed a break from her talking or to quit down. When I complained that her voice was bothering me, I was the on in trouble.
_________________
I'm not weird, you're just too normal.
Kids need to learn how to use their "inside voice". Just because a child is happy is no excuse to let them scream and squeal.
Do you find a child's laughter as repellent? That can get pretty loud as well.
Actually yes. My parents were always yelling at me for being "too loud" and I was often loud becuase I was excited. My parents also claimed they needed brakes from me talking. I guess I'm screwed up. My perfect, NT neice was ALWAYS talking and really loud sometimes, she would even drive me into sensory overload meltdowns but she was never told my parents needed a break from her talking or to quit down. When I complained that her voice was bothering me, I was the on in trouble.
Thousands of people, including many on the spectrum, find the sound of children's laughter a most awesome thing. The fact that you find it disturbing does not mean that all children must be silenced in your presence.
Misbehaving and naughty children should be brought into rein as soon as possible. It is reasonable to expect a good parent to be at least TRYING to control such behaviour, one way or another. It would even be reasonable to support the parents in doing this. Threatening them, making disapproving faces, etc etc does not help them complete the task.
Children who are behaving well should be allowed to continue behaving well, and not forced into silence as if they have done something wrong, because they have not.
Children with parents who are clearly failing should probably be enjoined to perform their parenting tasks, but in a restaurant type situation it is best to leave that task to the management/staff. Having BEEN that staff, I can assure you that that task is no fun at all, but it is often taken better from staff than random strangers demonstrating their superior childcare abilities.
Finally, its quite possible that the child in question is making a substantial noise for a reason a passing observer will not understand. Disabilities fit into this as one example. Sudden injury might also fit this. It is hardly fair to start strong-arming a parent after the waiter has tipped coffee all over their child (or whatever.)
_________________
"There is a time when the operation of the machine becomes so odious, makes you so sick at heart,
that you can't take part" [Mario Savo, 1964]
I was very well behaved as a child but I did have problems with volume control. Particularly when happy and excited. I grew up in an area where children were expected to be seen but not heard. Whenever anyone gave my dad a dirty look or huffed or complained because of my volume I was told to be quiet, which I did and he would politely apologise. Then when we got home he would take his belt off and I would be punished for embarassing him.
The only thing it ever taught me was fear.
Ichinin
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How about telling your damn kid to shut the f**k up?
I do hope you don't actually say things like that to parents near their children, because that's a very good way to get taken outside and turned into a fine meat paste. People get very touchy about that sort of thing.
Actuall i do tell them. And unlike most of you here, i know how to punch someone in the face. I got tired of being kicked around by bullys. If they want to fight, bring it ON.
Btw: I advice everyone to vote with their wallet. If you get tired of this crap, walk up to the restaurant owner/teller/waiter/whatever, tell them you're not comming back and explain why. Maby things will start to change when it is going to start affecting their cashflow.
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"It is far better to grasp the Universe as it really is than to persist in delusion, however satisfying and reassuring" (Carl Sagan)
McDonalds have play areas for kids. Parents can eat out there while the kids play and make lot of noise. Chuckie Cheese is like that too and family fun centers where kids can play and scream as they play on the equipment. There used to be a Discovery Zone where kids could play and make lot of noise but those places went bankrupt and they shut down.
I would tell my kid to be quiet too. Mine sure did when we get loud and if we were at the wrong place for that.
Heck even school playgrounds is a place for kids to be loud at and playgrounds in parks.
So people bothered by that stuff can stay away from those places or be prepared to hear that stuff if they wish to go to Chuckie Cheese or family fun centers.
And why is it fair to be told to be quiet as a child when you get too loud but yet can't expect other kids to be quiet when they're loud?
Ichinin
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Location: A cold place with lots of blondes.
Well, thats the thing isn't it... i never go to MCD's and such and expect peace and quiet, that would be insane, its one of the reasons why i avoid such "family" places. I eat where normal "family" types usually cannot afford to eat or at off hours when the place just have opened (etc) so i don't have to deal with that kind of s**t.
_________________
"It is far better to grasp the Universe as it really is than to persist in delusion, however satisfying and reassuring" (Carl Sagan)
How about telling your damn kid to shut the f**k up?
I do hope you don't actually say things like that to parents near their children, because that's a very good way to get taken outside and turned into a fine meat paste. People get very touchy about that sort of thing.
Actuall i do tell them. And unlike most of you here, i know how to punch someone in the face. I got tired of being kicked around by bullys. If they want to fight, bring it ON.
Btw: I advice everyone to vote with their wallet. If you get tired of this crap, walk up to the restaurant owner/teller/waiter/whatever, tell them you're not comming back and explain why. Maby things will start to change when it is going to start affecting their cashflow.
I'm sure you know how to punch people in the face, but that's also a very fast way to get barred/arrested or again just turned into a fine meat paste. There is ALWAYS someone bigger and harder than you. Still, I can't imagine eating out with you is much fun, having to wait to order for twenty minutes whilst you start a fist-fight over a noisy child.
_________________
"There is a time when the operation of the machine becomes so odious, makes you so sick at heart,
that you can't take part" [Mario Savo, 1964]
Ichinin
Veteran
Joined: 3 Apr 2009
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,653
Location: A cold place with lots of blondes.
How about telling your damn kid to shut the f**k up?
I do hope you don't actually say things like that to parents near their children, because that's a very good way to get taken outside and turned into a fine meat paste. People get very touchy about that sort of thing.
Actuall i do tell them. And unlike most of you here, i know how to punch someone in the face. I got tired of being kicked around by bullys. If they want to fight, bring it ON.
Btw: I advice everyone to vote with their wallet. If you get tired of this crap, walk up to the restaurant owner/teller/waiter/whatever, tell them you're not comming back and explain why. Maby things will start to change when it is going to start affecting their cashflow.
I'm sure you know how to punch people in the face, but that's also a very fast way to get barred/arrested or again just turned into a fine meat paste. There is ALWAYS someone bigger and harder than you. Still, I can't imagine eating out with you is much fun, having to wait to order for twenty minutes whilst you start a fist-fight over a noisy child.
I wouldn't start it, but i would sure the hell finish it...
_________________
"It is far better to grasp the Universe as it really is than to persist in delusion, however satisfying and reassuring" (Carl Sagan)
How about telling your damn kid to shut the f**k up?
I do hope you don't actually say things like that to parents near their children, because that's a very good way to get taken outside and turned into a fine meat paste. People get very touchy about that sort of thing.
Actuall i do tell them. And unlike most of you here, i know how to punch someone in the face. I got tired of being kicked around by bullys. If they want to fight, bring it ON.
Btw: I advice everyone to vote with their wallet. If you get tired of this crap, walk up to the restaurant owner/teller/waiter/whatever, tell them you're not comming back and explain why. Maby things will start to change when it is going to start affecting their cashflow.
I'm sure you know how to punch people in the face, but that's also a very fast way to get barred/arrested or again just turned into a fine meat paste. There is ALWAYS someone bigger and harder than you. Still, I can't imagine eating out with you is much fun, having to wait to order for twenty minutes whilst you start a fist-fight over a noisy child.
I wouldn't start it, but i would sure the hell finish it...
Going over to a parent and telling them to "shut their damn kid the f**k up" is "starting it".
_________________
"There is a time when the operation of the machine becomes so odious, makes you so sick at heart,
that you can't take part" [Mario Savo, 1964]
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