When did you realize you want to be a part of something

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And started trying to learn social skills?

I'm posting this because that Maja Aspie chick offa Youtube recently posted that she started caring at around 12.

I imagine most people start to feel this way too.

For me, it was like the beginning of this school year, though I started to understand friendship around the beginning of high school.

I had those natural instincts of discomfort around strangers like normal people.

Though I didn't understand that they were normal feelings till the start of high school.

Hard to answer. I wouldn't say that I cared when I was younger. I wanted to be a part of a larger picture but at the same time I wanted to change the world i.e. make it conform to how I thought the world should be. I would say that until my first romantic relationship I was a pretty selfish person that didn't care about other people.

About age 15 when I realised there was nobody left I could rely on in my life. Depression is a powerful motivator.

I've felt a bit bad about my unpopularity since around 7 or 8, but I had some good friends at the time, so I wasn't too worried. It was when I was about 10-11, when I drifted apart from my old friends that I really started caring. 2 years after that I sort of gave up for a time, but recently I've started caring again. I've realized that my lonely hobbies won't be enough to carry me through life, and to be honest, they aren't even enough right now.

Me too!! !

I had depression when I first moved schools. It was AWFUL. I failed all my classes that semester. Even when I took summer school, I'd come home so bored, lonely, and depressed. I would just go to sleep and not do my homework.
I nearly failed summer school too.

How did you start making friends?

Please go into depth, including body language, proximity, familiarity,etc.

You are my age so this is quite interesting.

I have 2 friends and many negative acquaintances.

Well, I learned that people look at what they are interested in. Up until this I had assumed they heard everything around them like I did, and it really enlightened me when I found out they could only truly focus on one thing at a time.

I found connecting to others through music and sharing new bands was a good way of meeting people, as was sharing my art interest as well as Calvin and Hobbes strips. What has helped me most so far has been a Warhammer 40,000 club I go to. There you can meet people that are intelligent but also have a sense of humor.

Body language-wise I learned how to show interest, learned that if I hated eye contact I could just look over their shoulder, timing, facial expressions (I can't do frowns though), faking interest in random things around me (its stupid but remember: most have gate control.)

With proximity I keep people at a distance until i can trust them. This seems psychologically satisfying for them, and I am known to my friends as a guy who enjoys giving hugs. Generally though I've learned to let others initiate hugs/close proximity rather than me try to create it. Some don't respect my hypersensitive touch though, particularly hispanics. My friends know if I touch them I trust them.

As far as familiarity goes, please describe what you mean by that. I had multiple interpretations.

UnLoser, now that I have a few contacts I can rely on I feel fine just working with my interests and am very happy with my life currently. I start working this next summer though, so that shall be interesting.

Familiarity as in:the first time you saw them, how did you act?
Or the second time?
And so on.

I generally observe when I'm first meeting them to see what their responses to jokes are, what their interests are, musical/artistic tastes, TV shows they enjoy (because let's be honest, they are great for when you aren't in a mood to do anything in particular) and their personality type. It helps so that I know how to approach them and how to intiate conversation.

The second time I generally mention what I have been doing lately and see if there is anything similar in interests and from there I am generally much more comfortable. Usually by the fifth meeting I am quite comfortable since I know what to expect.

Any other questions muslimmetalhead?

I got over my depression, boredom, and other such issues around my second year of high school when I just started breaking out of my shell and talking to people, getting involved in clubs, etc.

I even manged to meet a girl in class, who became one of my best friends. Over time I eventually became confident enough that people now refer to me as "very social."

I still have trouble, especially when it comes to knowing what to say sometimes(I've messed up and it can be deeply embarrassing!), but overall the days of sitting alone at lunch and never talking to anyone are long over.

Okay, what about the people in your classes or in the halls?

Do you approach them? If so, how?

Do you approach them differently if they're alone or with friends?

7th grade