Do you hate it when people try to help you?

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I am male and 17 with ASD and I hate it when someone does not know what I am doing and try's to help me. I don't know why but I just get really irritated by that. People would tell me that I am not doing something the right way and it is really annoying like I would be half way done with a assignment and someone would come up to me and say to me "dude you're not doing this right." I would just get so mad at them. It is mostly other teens that tell me this and I hate it when other people who think that I can't do something one way has to tell me what to do even if they are the same age as me. I also have this thing where the teacher tells me what I need to do and I just want to get it done to be done and I really screw up on the papers. I always get low scores on tests and assignments and I don't do well. I have frustrated so many teachers and other teens when they try to help me. I have been told that I am stupid because of this and I have been described as a Epic fail by other teens. I don't know why I screw up a lot but I think it has to do with my self esteem and how well I take this because now I have a inferiority complex or I think that I am not good at what I do and it kind of bugs me. I don't like it when people have to act like I don't know what I am doing because they always treat me like I am 5 and it just makes me so mad. Does anyone else get like this? What is you're experience?

YES

But I will accept help if and when I seek it out myself.

Next time, tell the person "I think I'll take my chances on doing it my way. Thanks anyhow" and keep working. If they persist, bluntly say that it REALLY isn't any of THEIR business if you do it "right" or not. Be polite, but firm. Hopefully, it won't escalate beyond that point.



You are not an "epic fail"--you are just used to doing things your own way. I was/am like that too.

I had an English teacher once whose criteria for grading, IMO, made absolutely no sense, and then when I went to him for "help", I just got more confused. It got to the point where I was forgetting how to write a simple sentence. Thankfully, switching classes helped. I wish it was that simple for you--it sounds like everyone around you acts this way.

I'm so glad to have left public school behind a long time ago (I'm 32)--why, why, WHY do they have to hold your hand on every little thing and discourage independent thought? It drove me nuts then, and it still drives me nuts to hear that it's still going on.

I think you will probably be more successful in life than many of those would-be "helpers." Hang in there, and don't let them warp your mind.

Yes I don't like it when people try to help and stick their hand in whatever I am doing and when I don't need help-when I legitimately need help I can never get any-for some reason no body is around to help.

I also had major issues with "constructive criticism" when I was your age but I've gotten a lot better about it. I now realize there are times when I could use it but during the times when I don't want any, I just give them an "I message" telling them, "thanx for trying to help BUT I feel that I should do things this way because (insert reason)." If they keep persisting on it, I just tell them again, "This is my way of doing things; take it or leave it.!"

I am the same way with critiscism, but I'm homeschooled so I can do my school work the way I want to... There are certain algebraic problems I can't do on paper, and mom lets me do them in my head.

I have a cooking class and I hate it because everyone is trying to do my job for me it is really annoying. I get really overwhelmed in that class because everyone is telling me to do so many things at once I can't concentrate. I hate it when people do my work for me and I want to do it my self. I get to shy to tell them to stop but they tell me that I go to slow in the class. I also can't handle knives in the class because my cooking group keeps telling me that I may cut my self. I also hate getting supplies because I always forget and everyone gets really mad at me. I also at that time of the day dose off and be in my own little imagination and everyone says that I act dumb and try's to help me with my problems. Does anyone else have this happen to them?