Letting out the Beast... feels nice.

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I have repressed emotions since I was a child and now that I'm trying to feel emotions nowadays, I have knocked loose tons of rage that has been building up. I get more and more upset and starting to put some holes in the wall. I just have to say it feels amazing getting a glimpse of the power that rage offers.

Anyone else feel something similar or just have a lot of anger?

Sounds like you've gone from one extreme to another. Are you going to fix the wall or pay to fix the wall? Actions still have consequences. I understand the thrill, but I hope you find a balance.

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Wow, I was expecting this to be about something very different

well, let me put it this way; the reason i repress my anger is becouse i have seen the beast loose; and i never want to see it again.
the few times that i let my rage go free would have gotten me in prison for quite a long time if there wasn't en external effect that protected me and the bystanders...
the first time was in elemtary school; i was a very clumsy walker back then, so i never really caught the one that was the target of my rage.
second time: there happened to be a few teachers nearby that managed to stop me (although all 4 of them needed to team up against me; 10 years old at the time)
third time; i was on the top layer of a bunk bed; and my self-preservation prevented me from jumping out.

there hasn't been a fourth time yet, as far as i remember, and i'm not about to ever let it get that far; since i have now 'solved' everything that prevented the punishable offence in the last 3 times...

Good luck with that.

I am going to fix the damages, it's just two holes in the wall. That was the first time I really let anything show, not too major at all but I want to see how powerful it can make me. I wouldn't go out and commit hate crimes, kill someone or get involved with the police, that isn't me.

Lol! Simonono you have a dirty mind my friend.

You know what really feels good without all the damage? Take a handful of silverware and throw it in the sink as hard as you can. I used to do that. There's something about the sound that releases the rage.

Letting out the rage is great, but I regret it very much later when I've calmed down but stuff I like is broken

I did have to scream out, a couple of curses when my dad got pissed at me when I thought I didn't have homework,but I actually did. I came back from the beach (this was ~a week or so) and he was pissed. Soon enough, we were screaming and yelling at each other. I stormed in my room, locked the door, he tried to kick the door down, I got a little scared, then it calmed for awhile, then he argued with mom, he was in a rage and then I was like: "I can't take this stupid* crap* anymore!! !" (*=replacement of a swear) and that made him even more mad. I was fuming at that point when I swore at my dad. And, yeah, he can easily lose his temper. But, we're fine now and I still love him very much.