How do I tell my parents?

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I am absolutely sure that I have Asperger's; however, I haven't been to a qualified psychologist yet to have it diagnosed. The problem is that I don't know how to tell my parents about my assumption, therefore I have been living with a gnawing uncertainty for more than a year. When I once mentioned Asperger's as an explanation for my inability to fit in, find friends and understand others, my mother simply said "Having such problems does not automatically point to Asperger's Syndrome." She even asked me whether I just wanted to have Asperger's because of recently having watched the new Sherlock series on TV! I then told her that I was being serious about the issue; but she didn't seem to listen, so I didn't try to keep the conversation going. Since then I've never mentioned Asperger's again.

I have been to a psychologist before because of suffering from depression, but she didn't seem to be very professional. I didn't like her, she said I should try to assimilate and that I simply needed to play more instead of "only" concentrating on school and learning. During our last sessions, we only played cards and boring board games. She then moved her practice to a different town; and I used this occasion to end my so called therapy.
I also noticed that my mother felt being accused of bringing me up "in a wrong way", so my therapy didn't make it easier for me to talk about my problems. With respect to my father; however, I didn't notice a change in his behaviour towards me (though this doesn't have to mean anything, I'm not good at noticing such things).

By the way, I never mentioned AS during my therapy sessions, mostly because I hadn't really considered having it. However, my psychologist once talked to me about my "intellectual giftedness" and asked me whether I would have prefered to attend a "special school". I told her about my special interests and that I hated to interact with others, but loved watching them, trying to find out as much as possible about them and observing their behaviour. I said this made me feel like a psychopath, and all she said was "That sounds psychopathic indeed."

Now, to make a long story short:
I recently found a psychologist on the internet who can diagnose AS and whose practice is in a town nearby. I feel I should contact her to ask for an appointment, but I can't do this without having talked to my parents about it beforehand. So how do I tell them? I'm afraid they won't take me seriously or that they might think that I'm just trying to find excuses for my problems. In this case, would they ever accept a diagnosis? I need them to support me right now, but it appears they never want to listen when I try to find the reason why I'm so different!

Thanks in advance,

Aliviet (from Germany)

Hey
When I read what you wrote, it was basically me. Everything from depression (and the not-so-helpful therapist) to not knowing what to do. The thing that helped me most in getting a diagnosis was my teachers and school counsellor. When an adult talks to another, I think they tend to convince each other better. That helped educate my parents on what AS is so they could help find someone to diagnose me.
I think you might have a few really nice teachers that you talk to a lot and they might be really good to talk to now. Like list down your symptoms and tell them you suspect AS if they can't tell from what you've told them.
Most importantly, give your parents time. Because of my history of depression, my parents were a little harsh with me at first. They've cooled down quite a bit and I think they now see the reasons behind my depression and my behaviour.

Maybe try mentioning the difficulties you're having to your Mum without mentioning AS? Simply saying "I feel like this, I have difficulties with this and I want to see if there's something causing it and if I can get any support with it." If she sees you're feeling distressed - whatever the cause - she should want to help you. I think it's pretty easy for a lot of people to assume young people are misguided and easily influenced. She's probably just worried about you labelling yourself too quickly, but she can't deny you're having problems which you'd like some help with.