[b]????????????[/b]
27 Sep 2012, 7:49 am
I finished 7th Grade last year with a fine, very fine boyfriend who I adore but we didn't keep in touch over the summer because we have a weird relationship. Almost everybody who went to his elementary school asked me why in the world do I like him so much because he has problems and was in speech class. I was insulted double because I REALLY do like him
and I was in speech and special services for kindergarten, first and second grade too!! So, I guess nobody should like me or want to date me either. They even said that his privates were tiny too!! ! and this one boy said that his own privates were bigger and better!! I felt so dirty after all this talk about privates. Well, this year got off to a bad start. He ignored me and hurt me very much by ignoring me. He stares at other girls and then waits for my reaction. I try to be strong and ignore this but he's really hurting me and I don't know why. The weird thing is that on that first day of school, he was with his counselor and was crying about me ignoring him. I didn't ignore him! I thought he'd ignore me and I waited for him to say hello and he didn't! He talks to other girls! So, why can't he talk to me too?! I want him to text me but I can't get up the nerve to give him a note with my number because if he says he doesn't want it, I'll get sick and probably will throw up all over the floor. Maybe I should have listened to all those other kids who said he had problems. Maybe this is what they meant. Every time I pass him in the hall, other boys start laughing. He doesn't laugh. He just looks sad. He ignored me in gym class too when everybody talks to each other. I cried that time only to have his stupid friend laugh at me. His friend was one of the boys who talked bad about him. Any ideas???? I also found out that my mom knew his parents lots of years ago. She said his mom was super shy and his father was a weird little kid but very, very nice. Maybe I just can't handle this or him??? I like him so much!! ! I can't stand it when he talks or even looks at another girl! He's driving me crazy!! I feel happier when I don't see him at all. But as soon as I pass him in the hall, I get a sick feeling in my stomach and a headache. What the heck happened here? I almost forgot to mention something else. Last year on the last day of school, we left class for the last few minutes to go out in the hall and kiss. One of my teachers caught us. She didn't say anything but when I went to her class, she called me a dirty rabbitt. Now, all the teachers look at me really funny. I feel so ashamed!! They look at him really angry but they look at me like I'm sleezy or something. He was my boyfriend!! How am I sleezy?? I didn't do that with anyone else! Just him and he's the only one I'd like to do that with even if he is a very sloppy kisser and pushes his privates against me. I like his arms around me. It's just feels really right to me. Did I do something wrong?? I'm afraid to tell my mom. She thinks all boys are dirty minded. She give me a lecture. I want him to like me again like before.
