delayed teen angst

Post Reply New Topic

Does anyone else here feel that they never experienced a difficult time during the typical (teenage) years for difficult emotional coping, yet found that things got really "rocky" later on?

I'm 22 and just started studying at a new university this fall, and it was the first time I moved a long way from home. Now that I just spent three weeks back at home, I have gotten absolutely FULL of angst. Things that before caused excitement and fun when going well, and just seemed ordinary the rest of the time, got to the point where they seemed just fine when going well, and deeply depressing when there was any sort of disappointment. For instance, there's this woman whom I always felt erotic tension around, but only saw a few times a year, and before I left, I was just excited to see her, but now I'm deeply depressed when I thought I'd get to see her and didn't. This whole thing brought into the foreground a huge tangle of doubts and dreads about the future that has been bugging me in some form for the last few years. I feel that the driving force for the transition to such angst was the fact that I feel much more comfortable in the physical landscape around where I grew up than I do at my new location, and the fact that I would have to leave it behind after my vacation.

I feel that my relationship with my parents has reached a critical turning point. The things that consume my emotional attention on a daily basis are pretty much all things that I can't talk about with them, or know that they'd not be able to understand well. I feel that what I want, particularly the type of relationship/interaction I want with women/girls, is so far from my parent's value system that it hearing them talk about the things that really matter to me inevitably leads to frustration.

As a teenager, I was always a good student, and I still am very interested in academic subjects. I never was a troublemaker, and still am not. I never liked to talk about the "stupid" things that a lot of teens do. I also have never had a relationship with someone of the opposite sex, which I feel has locked my emotional development in the "teen" stage to some degree. This, along with my general emotional differences from the general population (possibly due to my AS) is contributing greatly to my feeling of angst.

You should begin to take some risks, I mean, you are going to the new college so that is half the battle won. Now think, you got the school for adulthood, now try to secure a bond. As cliche as it is, there is always a table at Starbucks to meet in. Use that aspie sense of wit and passion. Also, for sticking to cliches, there are over 3 billion girls on the planet! One "no" makes 2,999,999,999 remaining. You are not an island, and I too struggle with that reality.

Also, I just remembered that aspies tend to have monotropic interests, meaning it is focused on one thing at a time.

http://www.autismusundcomputer.de/computing.en.html

Those cliches above cater to the NT mind, casual, multiple. However, maybe a few clubs that you're interested in can help spark something.

Its kinda like that for me. I didnt really start the teen angst stage till my late teens, 17 18 yrs old. I felt like I was 12 or 13. Before that I was very obedient towards authority figures and got good grades. While I continued to get good grades throughout highschool, I became rather rebellious in thought and by the end of my senior year I was pushing my parents away with full force. I just felt my parents 'ways' has sorta kept me back in life for a person of my age. I didnt get my first demerits till senior year because of my schools strict dresscode. I kinda had that urge to rebel and when actually do it got me into my worst trouble of my life at age 19.

As for relationships, I didnt even have friends till I was almost 18. I didnt have my first friend with the opposite sex till uhh 18 and half. I've never been in a relationship but Im close friends with a guy who actually is my only close friend right now. I dont have much experiance with the opposite sex not with the same sex either to think about it.