i don't feel myself as a man

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well, first of all i'd want to say i read the topics so much, therefore writing a certain quantity of posts about these questions in a foreign language isn't always confortable to me... then...

well, i don't know how to start this properly but i have to say all my life i used to be appointed as a gay boy to everybody. i never liked and don't like this and thus, due to this (not only), i have difficult to stabilish relationships as i was never introduced to these things. i don't know if women avoid me or doesn't see me as a man, if they see one gay-ish boy or a cute one with childish aspects. in july i'll be 21 without never dating anyone. all my friends have their girlfriends and boyfriends. i'm just avoiding at thinking on these things. i don't feel myself as a man. i don't feel attracted to many things my male friends are interested as the same way i don't for my females. i don't feel effeminated. if there's a thing i could do, is probably turning the things more suitable and smooth or just being at home playing music to myself alone. i'm wasted of all these people calling me gay, werido or odd. i'm wasted of not feeling any virility or any thing people use to call this.

Human sexuality is a spectrum. Since I am heterosexual (female), I cannot know how another way of being 'feels.' But diversity should be respected and appreciated! So, whatever you 'are' (wrong wording?), you're still yourself. I would never consider you a 'weirdo' or 'odd.' I do know more than in the general population, Aspies/Auties have a high proclivity to homosexuality, transgender, or asexual. I've read 2 of Temple Grandin's books (she's great, btw - HFA). Anyway, she doesn't mention too much about her sexuality, but she has no partner and has never had the need/desire to. Perhaps she is asexual - unknown. But she did write that she's happy in her choice, and that's what matters. She does have friends, and they are all special to her, but no romantically. Just physically, Temple is a NOT feminine.

Do you have nice friends who are fulfilling? I am sorry if they tease - that's just wrong! Friends don't do that.

The few that I've know that have 'gender issues' (hate that word - cringe), do have it rough. I do not, in any way, feel sorry for them, but I do feel badly that some ignorant harsh outsiders assign judgment.

Well, that didn't help much....sigh. But you do not get to 'choose' your sexuality; it just is! You can explore too. I think WP is very accepting.

There are several asexual people on the forums here. You don't need to act masculine if that is not how you feel. You need to behave like yourself, and try to be comfortable with the person you are. Don't worry about what other people think of you. You may be tired of feeling different, but there are a lot of people who feel the same as you. Don't worry so much about being a manly man. Worry about being a good friend and a good man.

You may need to find friends who are more open minded about what men enjoy. I have friends who like watching sports on television. I find that boring. I like flying kites and my friends think that is boring. No name calling, no bad feelings. We are allowed to be different from each other and still be friends.

Your friends should be trying to help you find a woman that likes how you look and think. If you want to meet women, find volunteer work to do. Keep trying different volunteer activities until you find one with single women you might like. Let them get to know you for a few months, then ask them out. If they say no, ask them if they know someone who might like to date you. Many women like making couples from people they know. Some countries have clubs to join for sport and hobbies, instead of volunteer activities.

Church is another good place to look. If you are a nonbeliever, keep it to yourself. The women are there and they can find out about your faith after your first date. Or, they might know someone who might like to date you.

I don't feel myself as a woman, sometimes.

i'd just want the things would be normal and have the chance to explore and feel me as a man. i used to be claimed as a "fa***t boy" (beyond all that we aspies know as being "odd" and sort of those) since i was a child and i just can't understand. for example, some days ago i was walking on a corner, hurrying to the bank and there was a one, hooting his car's horn to me and whistling on that way we'd never like to listen. i look suddenly and i saw he was an adult doing a stupid thing like this, not an irresponsible youngster. at these moments i just feel shocked. what provoke people to act like this if i was wearing common clothes, walking with my head a bit lowered and listening to my music on phones? i just can't understand... so how can i feel anything about being a man? maybe my AS doesn't permit that (to see or get close to it).

I find the thread title amusing. Maybe I'm just perverted.

I'm straight but I don't feel manly.
I don't feel comfortable around "alpha male" types - even if I do get along.
I don't think other people see me as manly so I often feel pretty ridiculous for just being around.
At heart I feel pretty much genderless and weird.

I've had people call me gay, gossip about the possibility of me being gay or directly use the idea to harass me, both in the past and recently - but I'm not even gay. I'm basically, nothing. . .

well im 18 without a single date, and I'm actually a bit "affeminated" not in the way I speak or anything, but more in the things I like, but I did have some hormonal problems, I was also reffered to as "that girl-ish guy" and I was always considered odd (normal for an aspie) and I'm always just a friend for girls but I dont fell a need to be a very masculine guy (dont take me wrong, I do like women) but I like my situation the way it is, so dont be so hard in yourself, life is so much more than dating.

I don't know how to deal with it.

People like that tend to harass me, both now and when I was at school - my own uncle is an example of that; he himself is a pathetic person.

I, for example, practice muay thai and have classmates like that - but they are friendly to me (out of pity. . . I don't know. . .). Still, I cannot reply to them with the same energy and communication style. In fact, the more they try to be friendly to me, the more uncomfortable and weird I feel - and the more awkward I become to the point I feel like disappearing.
Also, I get the feeling they might as well start bullying me any time soon - like something that's just waiting to happen.