decided i'd like feedback asap but im going to write alot so im going to edit this post with the continuations to speed everything up a little (dont worry, i'll leave some sort of marker to note where i break off to sleep or wander or whatever)
initiate rambling, go.
hi,hello,bonjour,hola,[wave primary hand], and any others you care to add, now the nicities are done with to some kind of point
(maybe?) i'd like your comments and thoughts on what im going to write (focused on what your thoughts on if i may have as or not and what i should do next, appologies if it seems irrelevent or incoherent even at times but im sure that its relitavely normal here.
basically i started talking on another topic and decided that it might deserve its own thread (even though many others do the same thing so it probably seems a little stale by now).
(chuckles to self about a joke i remembered)
back to the point (i'll use bttp as an abbreviation from here i'll probably use it a few times), i believe that i may have some level of as, i have only been researching as for 3 days (nights in all honesty) but have read a good amount of information in the form of both anecdotal evidence from this website (and others initially but this seemed to be the most active
forum so my focus settled) and multiple sources of medical symptoms ect.
this had all been spurred on by a observation of one of my housemates (i'm a uni student, aged 19 by the way) who studies psychology that poor eye contact is a symptom of autism.
bttp, from the evidence i gathered i'll try and explain all of the symptopms i think i exhibit, and try and attach relevance to them as i go.
scored highly on the "aspie" quiz (173/46), and on others availible online (i know these arnt for diagnostic purposes but i feel given that alot of the questions are based on psychiatric ones they are a valuable self screening tool)
poor eye contact, i never really thought it was an issue untill it was mentioned, after this i asked a few of my friends about it and they all noticed that my eye contact was (and still is) bad.
toe walking, dont remember when this started but i have done it as long as i can remember, only inside with my shoes off, at anything above a slow walking pace,i think i may also run from my toes but this may be normal, most people comment that i have an odd or funny run. i also have the bouncy gait and if im hyper i bounce around on my feet when standing around. this recently caused a bouncer to think i was pilled up and search me and only me that night, in a club where i could spot more
pill heads than drunks, interestingly i can handle clubs to some extent (mainly by using alcohol and smoking alot of cigs to get away from everything, and by stimming alot (usually a watch but ive stopped wearing one after having looked into as as that was a really bad stim) even after this i spend alot of the night in what i guess is a shutdown (no focus or thoughts) bttp
stimming as mentioned, i have had many of these over the years, recently twitching my nose has come up, but i have and randomly exhibit hand flapping, spinning, tapping,pulling at my moustache, playing with hair, (possibly sneezing very violently multiple times but im not entirely sure on this or if its at all related). and many others.
19 Feb 2009, 1:31 am
