Coping by Relationships?

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This seems to be something I've been guilty of, and it's still part of why I want a relationship. Being close to the right person in an affectionate way really takes the bite out of daily life. I find myself with more energy, and in a better mood. It's like all my negative energy drains out while cuddling. It's exhilarating.

I just wanted to know if anyone else has done this. I know how odd it is, but it seems to be something about me that will always be a little odd. I've been this way as long as I can remember. *shrug*

I'm guilty of this also. Not that I don't sincerely love my girlfriend just for who she is. But being in a relationship makes a lot of things so much easier. Of course other things it makes harder too.

Yup, same here,
my girlfriend really brightens my day .

I can defiantly relate. I have a very hard time relating to most people & it takes a lot for me to be close to anyone but when I feel I have a someone in my life who cares about me & is a better person with me in her life; I feel much better about myself. If I have a connection with someone who I feel can relate, understand & accept me; I feel much happier. Most docs would call this codependency thou but I think if I had a partner who was the same way; we could help each other. God I'm lonely rite now

Opposite over here.

It's easier and less painful being alone.

This could be the story of my life. When I have that person around, I actually feel fulfilled with my life; of course, the reverse applies far more often. I need to have someone around, as a close friend or something more, or I just lose the plot, and I've had no one for a long time. Having trouble dealing with quick changes doesn't help either.

And having taken a look at codependancy, it seems a honest description of one relationship in paticular, the breakdown of which pretty much single-handed caused my swing into depression, especially once I found and lost another (totally seperate) person in fairly short order. Like you say, completely cured my mounting hatred and depression for a while, but just meant it broke out like a dam afterwards.

It's taken a lot of self-control and a fair bit of lingering care and responcibility for this person to stop some serious violence breaking out. The rest of the time, it's completely eating away at my mental health, not to mention my life. Has anyone else had it in this form, and does anyone know any decent ways to cope with it?

Edit: The worst part is how it keeps and kept on happening. I'm a forgving person at the worst of times, and it's almost impossible not to forgive this person every time she asks, for the simple reason I want to have her around and want to make sure that she's ok. But every time, that just results in an even bigger break-down, even bigger sink into depression, all because of the simple fact of who she is, and that isn't going to change. She did a lot for me once, but by now it's distant past, an even months ago I was seeing how one-sided it was becoming, and this was all partially caused by trying to resolve that. If I forgive her it's going to just chip away another bit of my will to live, and just living life and seeing her when she doesn't apparently give enough of a damn and is perfectly willing to let this all happen just delays it.

I've attempted totally cutting off contact, which lasted until a month later she pestered me so much by text I completely blew up at her eventually, and so far as I can tell there isn't much that I haven't tried to do. I've already arranged to no longer attend any lessons with her (amazingly, the school I'm in is extremely accomodating, though they don't specifically know about my condition), but however unreasonable it is, just walking past her is enough to notch my blood pressure up. It's just a steady spiral downwards, and I'm not sure I can really be subjective about it by now.

I have a problem with this as well...and I suffer from withdrawal when the object of affections is away.....

Yes, I do this too. I have for the last eighteen years near enough gone from one relationship to the next, with never more than five or six months alone before I'm in another relationship. The trouble is, there have been a couple of relationships that have not been good for me; my current one is just such in truth.

And that's the thing; my girlfriend, although she may (may) mean well and may love me, denies that I have aspergers but constantly berates me for not knowing just what the right thing to say or do at any given moment is. She's also demanding to the point of being controlling. So...I am fast coming to the conclusion that it will be better to be alone, be myself and do what I want to do and not have to worry about upsetting her.

And you know what? When the time comes, and it will - I shall enjoy going my own way.