Yeah,so,

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My painfully slow process of getting to know people has failed once again in the relationship department. I have been talking to this girl I'm very interested in for about a month or so, and just as we start to dive in to topics that aren't music or chit chat, one of my friends (who is an extremely charming and outgoing fellow, and I do like him very much) comes out of seemingly nowhere and sweeps her right up. Yep. It's Facebook Official now and everything.

I am extremely happy for him. We have been friends since about the beginning of this school year, even though our interests and personality differ a lot (like I said, he's very outgoing and charming, I'm more reserved, and...contemplative I guess,) and he is a really nice kid. For obvious reasons though, I do feel quite anxious and saddened at the same time. I feel like this just happens a lot I guess, where I just move too slow and someone who is a bit more skilled or something comes in and picks up what I couldn't even begin to lift. I wish I could change, but at the same time I like (or maybe just am comfortable with) the way I do things. I just guess I wish there were more people who were the same or were at least more patient with me.

I'm laughing right now about it actually. It's an anxious laugh, and a familiar flood of unwelcome and annoying thoughts have been filling my mind for the last couple hours, but at least I am laughing. It's better than nothing.

Anyways, thanks for reading. I'm not really looking for any advice, but if you're willing to offer, then I'm willing to listen. I just wanted to put this out there because there really aren't many other places where I feel comfortable doing so.

Thanks guys.

Hey. That stinks. I'm listening.

I've had that kind of stuff happen to me when I was also in school. You brought back a lot of old memories with your post.

Sorry to hear about that. Been there a time or ten.

Does it matter? If she was that easily sweeped away by this "friend" of yours, she was not worth it.

I'd suggest forgetting about her, as she does not seem to be worth a second thought, and end your friendship with that guy. That will make you feel much better. Hatred is key to self-confidence.

Thanks guys for the kind words

The friend had no idea I liked her by the way. At least, I never bothered to tell him.

This has happened to me too!

Uh, I don't understand the logic here. How does hating someone else make you feel better about yourself? And why exactly should he end his friendship with this guy if the guy had no idea he liked the girl in the first place, and therefore wasn't just trying to snatch her up out of spite?

Eh, sorry, DerKodeMeister. It sucks when that happens, but unless you think your friend tried to win over the girl knowing that you liked her, I don't see any reason to stop being friends with him.

The sad fact is that women are attracted to strong outgoing men. This is etched into their genes.

Thousands of generations of cave women learned to go after the biggest, strongest most aggressive males because those men would be better at protecting them and putting meat on the table.

These days they would be better off going for brilliant nerds like Bill Gates but instinct trumps logic every time.