Having autism and being an empath

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I feel like the older I get the better I get at handling certain things that pertain to autism such as multi-tasking but I still get really bent out of shape if it's too much multi-tasking and sounds or people getting in my way as I try to work. I find my autism traits come out more when I'm having moments of picking up on other's emotions. If someone who is angry enters the room, I have no idea at that time they are angry but my mood instantly shifts from just fine to angry. Then the person talks about their bad day and how they are moody.

When I walk into a room where someone is sad, I feel it myself and get sad. I feel content when it's just me alone. The more people around, the more I stim, the more I feel so many different emotions running through my body and it makes me just stiffen up and I want to get away as soon as possible to my nice quiet place.

Anyone else like this? I feel like I feel too much. Lights are too bright, sounds that are minor to others are just upsetting to hear. I feel overly sensitive to the point to where in order not to feel like a complete freak I just hold it in as much as possible by switching off emotions just to deal. I get really quiet to keep up with the blankness. My face shows no emotions.

I am like this.I can also feel like I am "invaded" by other people's emotions and I am very sensitive to "vibes" of people and situations...Sometimes I am not always able to know what is going on on an "intellectual" level though...the type of empathy I have is not totally typical..I witness NT behaviour on a regular basis that by my standards seems to be heavily lacking in empathy...

when somebody is crying, i am crying. when somebody is angry, i feel tightness in my chest. but when somebody is happy, i feel strangely empty. i don't know why.

I know what you mean on that one..
When I am around some people when they are acting really happy and cheerful, i can be filled with a sense of dispair.
.

May be, its because you feel the real emotion hidden under the happy pretense...
and it is a contradiction...

That gets me a lot. What someone is trying to get across, like a 'strong face,' I tend to miss or only halfway pick up. But what's going on under the surface seems to come in at full-blast. So it gets confusing as what to do or how to respond (especially when being overwhelmed with someone else's emotions...), or just generally I screw it up, so tend to avoid if possible these days.

Possibly maybe so at least sometimes....
Other times it might be that I don't get where they are coming from...There is a girl who works for my business who is insanely cheerful ALL the time..HAPPY POSITIVE UPBEAT Gushing with joy etc... I have no good reason to doubt her sincerity, but she makes me wanna cover my ears when she talks to me...She makes me feel like I have just been flattened by a big pink happy steam roller....and I never feel what she is feeling, but I do feel repelled by her....and can only interact with her comfortably by using the lowest and flattest tone possible, so she can't be fueled by anything I say to her.


One of the reasons that I avoid pursuing most potentially reciprocal friendships is that I don't like feeling invaded by their personalities...If I let anyone "in" I feel the potential of being a bit "warped" by them....and it makes me uncomfortable...

I know what you mean. Some upbeat people can give me an emotional boost. Others make me feel miserable, especially if I'm already depressed. With the ones that make me feel worse there's a sense of incongruousness that makes me feel as if the other person is trying to manipulate me into matching their emotion, or telling me that my my mood is unacceptable.

I find that I'm very sensitive to the vibes and the emotions of others.

my emotions are really powerful and overwhelming and although I sometimes do have problems emphasising I usually do so too much to the point I'm always affected by their mood.

Thank you....I thought I was crazy for being Aspie and being "invaded" by other people's feelings. One of the reasons that I don't like hanging out with people especially people I don't know is that I feel their feelings and I am much more calm when I'm not around others when they are angry or sad. I've used this quality sometimes to help me in my relationships however it gets me into trouble as well. The hardest time I have is what someone else discussed about people being duplicitous. I hate someone who acts happy or some other positive emotion but then I can feel what they are actually feeling and it's a negative emotion. It causes a lot of chaos in my head.

Anyway, just saying....thanks for letting me know that there are other Aspies that deal with this as well.

Cheers

yeah I know what you mean.......sometimes I wish I could not feel what others were feeling, it would make being at my moms and her boyfriends house more bearable. But yeah a lot of times they're at each others throats and I of course can feel the tension and it pretty much prevents me from really focusing on anything.

I'm a little too frazzled right now to read every post on here, but I've been empathic as far back as I can remember, but I never thought to link my aspergers to it. I ignored my aspergers most of my childhood/teen life and suffered greatly for it. Lost many friends over many misunderstandings, and surrounded myself with the wrong people. All of which is torturous to emapth/aspie alike. But the way I look at it, I think the diagnosis assumes we have "trouble" picking up on other peoples emotions. But smelling a strawberry and not acknowledging the smell to the people around you doesn't mean you can't smell. And what problem we did have sensing people usually forces us to find a new way to figure them out i.e. empathic abilities. Problem being they are usually overwhelming, And often can only be ignored when your expressing yourself (which also causes you to miss the persons emotional cues.) I'm actually blown away by finding this thread. It's good to know I'm not crazy.

I feel this way too, it's really hard being around people who are angry or upset because I end up feeling it too and I never know why. It's also why I have a difficult time confronting people because I feel like if I upset them then I will feel upset and anxious too.

It's a common misunderstanding among autistics, that empathy means being able to feel what others are feeling. In fact, it means being perceived as feeling what others are feeling.

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