I'd hate to admit this... but I know its going too far....

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transformingcar
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01 Feb 2012, 8:38 pm

Well, it's a little hard to admit, but I guess I'd have to sooner or later.

you see, for almost as long as I can remeber, (and I mean since I was around 15 or maybe younger) I've been obsessed with some sick, twisted things...

I still remember one night several years ago when I had a bizarre dream of being trapped by a bunch of girls in their school. not sure but that might be where it started. sometimes my mind goes farther into sick thoughts then I can handle. I can't always control it. I feel terrible about the bad things going one in my mind. it's all centered around women who are, in one way or another, doing things that would seem awfully disturbing to most(most commonly they become giants and kill/eat people) .

sometimes I really hate myself becuase of that. I know it's all terribly wrong. I just want to learn to control those thoughts so they don't control me. I'm not saying it has to come to a total stop. just that it has to be better controlled so I can rest more peacefully at night, without too many sick thoughts. it always ends up over-controlling my dreams, and that makes it worse.

but perhaps the worst part, is how my sick fantasy tends to drive me mad. but of course not many people yet know of it. and that's why i'm trying to confess... so maybe someone can help me learn to keep this nightmare under control.

I know it's wrong, maybe im just a bad person. does anyone know of a way to better control such bad thoughts?



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01 Feb 2012, 8:47 pm

See a psychologist?


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cathylynn
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01 Feb 2012, 8:48 pm

is something disturbing going on in real life that could be triggering these dreams?

please don't feel guilty. we're not responsible for our dreams. sometimes dreams are what we wish for. sometimes they're what we dread.

anxiety meds in the valium (ativan, xanax, tranxene, centrax, klonopin, etc.) family tend to suppress dreams. if your sleep is compromised, that is, you don't get enough sleep because of these dreams, perhaps a doc would consider medicating you.



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01 Feb 2012, 8:58 pm

You just have some kind of giantess/vore fetish. It's one of the most common fetishes. It sounds like the only real problem is that you are ashamed of it.

Fetishes don't have anything to do with real life. It doesn't mean that you are a danger to society. It just means that you are kinky. Maybe someday you'll have a girlfriend who will do fantasy roleplay with you.

If you just accept that you have a weird sexual kink, then the frequency of the thoughts will actually decrease. The reason that you are constantly thinking about it is that you are ashamed of it. It's like how closeted gay people are obsessed with gay sex, but for comfortable gay people, it's just an incidental part of life.



transformingcar
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01 Feb 2012, 9:18 pm

The advice actually makes me feel better, maybe I can handle this, perhaps even get rid of it?

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You just have some kind of giantess/vore fetish. It's one of the most common fetishes. It sounds like the only real problem is that you are ashamed of it.


hold on a sec... how do you know what that is? and no, I don't want a girlfreind who would get in involved with it.

but still, any advice helps. thanks.



Declension
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01 Feb 2012, 9:25 pm

transformingcar wrote:
hold on a sec... how do you know what that is?


The internet is a strange and wonderous place. :wink:

transformingcar wrote:
and no, I don't want a girlfreind who would get in involved with it.


Oh come on, yes you do. You just don't think that it's possible. It actually is.

You have convinced yourself that having a weird sexual fetish makes you a bad person. How exactly does this make you a bad person? Everyone has something unusual about them. You're a good or bad person based on how you treat other people. Thoughts are harmless things, and you can't make them go away.



transformingcar
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01 Feb 2012, 9:39 pm

Quote:
The internet is a strange and wonderous place.


That it is... so true indeed.

Quote:
Oh come on, yes you do. You just don't think that it's possible. It actually is.

You have convinced yourself that having a weird sexual fetish makes you a bad person. How exactly does this make you a bad person? Everyone has something unusual about them. You're a good or bad person based on how you treat other people. Thoughts are harmless things, and you can't make them go away.


ok, your right, I feel much better. thanks for the help, maybe I'll be able to accept it now.

this does raise one question however, I wonder what other wrongplanet members think about this? (who actually saw this) not that it matters. but anyway, one thing is now certain, I just have to accept it. and again, thanks for helping me with this.



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01 Feb 2012, 11:30 pm

Obsessive-compulsive disorder can sometimes manifest as intrusive, personally unacceptable thoughts (i.e., thoughts about killing people, sacreligious behaviors, etc.) Maybe something like that could be going on.


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Chronos
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02 Feb 2012, 12:34 am

transformingcar wrote:
Well, it's a little hard to admit, but I guess I'd have to sooner or later.

you see, for almost as long as I can remeber, (and I mean since I was around 15 or maybe younger) I've been obsessed with some sick, twisted things...

I still remember one night several years ago when I had a bizarre dream of being trapped by a bunch of girls in their school. not sure but that might be where it started. sometimes my mind goes farther into sick thoughts then I can handle. I can't always control it. I feel terrible about the bad things going one in my mind. it's all centered around women who are, in one way or another, doing things that would seem awfully disturbing to most(most commonly they become giants and kill/eat people) .

sometimes I really hate myself becuase of that. I know it's all terribly wrong. I just want to learn to control those thoughts so they don't control me. I'm not saying it has to come to a total stop. just that it has to be better controlled so I can rest more peacefully at night, without too many sick thoughts. it always ends up over-controlling my dreams, and that makes it worse.

but perhaps the worst part, is how my sick fantasy tends to drive me mad. but of course not many people yet know of it. and that's why i'm trying to confess... so maybe someone can help me learn to keep this nightmare under control.

I know it's wrong, maybe im just a bad person. does anyone know of a way to better control such bad thoughts?


Are these fantasies that you get some degree of pleasure from, or unwanted thoughts that torment you?



transformingcar
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02 Feb 2012, 12:49 am

Quote:
Are these fantasies that you get some degree of pleasure from, or unwanted thoughts that torment you?


it's both, unwanted Torment, and mental pain. among other things. makes me feel wierd. in a bad way.



transformingcar
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02 Feb 2012, 12:51 am

Quote:
Obsessive-compulsive disorder can sometimes manifest as intrusive, personally unacceptable thoughts (i.e., thoughts about killing people, sacreligious behaviors, etc.) Maybe something like that could be going on.


that could be part of it. i'd never have thought of that before.



justalouise
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02 Feb 2012, 4:58 am

Declension has given you some excellent advice in this thread, all of which you should take to heart.

Human sexuality is a wonderful, expansive, and hugely varied spectrum. There is absolutely nothing wrong with acknowledging your desires, as long as everyone involved is a consenting adult. Your fantasies have no bearing on your moral standing in real life, the two are completely separate.

You can't control what gets you going--if you try to suppress it, you're going to experience more of the negative symptoms you describe.

If you want to see some excellent artsy vore/giantess/general crazy-ass fantasy illustration/comics, check out mamabliss.com. I don't even get off on those particular things and I love reading that site!



transformingcar
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02 Feb 2012, 8:38 am

Quote:
Declension has given you some excellent advice in this thread, all of which you should take to heart.

Human sexuality is a wonderful, expansive, and hugely varied spectrum. There is absolutely nothing wrong with acknowledging your desires, as long as everyone involved is a consenting adult. Your fantasies have no bearing on your moral standing in real life, the two are completely separate.

You can't control what gets you going--if you try to suppress it, you're going to experience more of the negative symptoms you describe.

If you want to see some excellent artsy vore/giantess/general crazy-ass fantasy illustration/comics, check out mamabliss.com. I don't even get off on those particular things and I love reading that site!


ok, thanks for helping, I'm trying to accept it now.

sadly, I got another problem, but it's unrelated to this. i'll have to ask for help with another issue. i'll put it in a new post.