Positively terrified of going to a therapist

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s0nshin3
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04 Feb 2012, 11:39 pm

Hi I'm an aspie suffering with depression, although you would never guess because the only expressions I ever make are smiling and laughing.
I really want to go to a therapist to get a diagnosis and some help, but I can't make myself do it.
Partly because the thought of going to a doctor on my own terms makes me very anxious, but also because when I talk about my feelings I choke up and can't properly express myself. I have a tendency to shrug everything off and say 'i'm fine' and 'its not a big deal' but it is, and i can't make myself say it.
I just wish i could talk to someone over chat and get a diagnosis that way, and just pick up some medication or something and be done with it.
Does anyone else struggle with these kind of fears, or have any ideas?



Trigas
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04 Feb 2012, 11:54 pm

I understand how you feel, and I'm on the first step to fixing the issues I have. My first appointment was last Tuesday and I was soooooooo stressed and scared, yet after it was over it was such a relief. For me it got to a point where I couldn't handle the problem anymore and I know now that I need outward help. Just know you're not alone in your fears though it does take a swift kick in the rear to get motivated to handle it and set things up.


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caramel0
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05 Feb 2012, 12:00 am

Used to struggle with it, first time I made a doc appointment for these kinds of issues it was only because my bf strongly strongly encouraged me to go do it NOW, not to sit on it because I was too scared to make an appointment.

Most docs/therapists will be understanding and help you out, and they are used to dealing with these things. You can also write key points down as a backup if you fear you will choke up and be unable to say them, can also help remind you with what to say if your mind goes blank :)

Also unfortunately there will be a few bad apples out there in terms of therapists that don't believe you and dismiss your claims, if you are unlucky enough to get one of these first go try to remember it has nothing to do with you personally and find another one. If you have found a genuinely caring person the therapist will be a positive experience.



Katrin
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05 Feb 2012, 12:01 am

When I went to get a diagnosis I found that writing everything down helped a lot, then if I didn't know what to say I looked at my notes, otherwise I'd just forget everything I wanted to say.


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OliveOilMom
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05 Feb 2012, 12:31 am

If you go to a psychiatrist for the depression instead of a psychologist, in my experience it's not a lot of talk. I told him I was depressed, he asked what I meant, I explained that I just don't see any reason to do anything, I don't see things getting any better, I'm not happy at all anymore, I don't want to do anything, I have no interest in anything. He asked how long it was going on, I told him. He asked if I had any physical symptoms, I told him no, just tiredness and sometimes I can't sleep. He asked if I had any thoughts of harming myself or anyone else, I told him no. He asked if I had ever been depressed before, and I told him yes. He asked if I had been on anything for it and I told him yes and what I took and the dose. He wrote a prescription and told me to make an appointment to come back in four weeks and to call if my symptoms got worse after I started the meds and handed me the paper to give to the girl.

A psychologist on the other hand will talk to you for 50 minutes.

In the hospital I had talk therapy with the psychiatrist for about 30 minutes. One hospital anyway. The others I didn't.

My experience with psychiatrists have always been like I described. It's usually no longer than a regular doctor visit. They ask questions about whats going on with you and you answer them. They don't probe into everything and have you talk about it like a psychologist. They ask, you answer. If you want to be more sure that's the kind of visit it will be, go to a larger group that has both psychiatrists and psychologists. If you want to be really sure go to one that has lots of psychologists and also LBSW's in addition to the psychiatrists. I could almost guarantee you that in one of those groups a psychiatrist isn't going to want to talk. He's going to refer you to one of the psychologists or LBSW's if you need therapy. You can also decline therapy for the time being and tell him you want to see how the medicine works first and if that doesnt do it alone, then you will add therapy.

Best of luck!

ETA: I really like therapy though. It's the only time that I can sit down with someone and talk about my feelings for almost an hour and they are interested and ask questions and talk to me about them. My husband can't do that and my mother just either directly insults what I'm saying, makes accusations, or has backhanded insults.


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questor
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05 Feb 2012, 12:34 am

I strongly agree with several other posters about writing key stuff down ahead of time. Having notes to refer to will definitely help. When people are stressed they often forget some of what they wanted to say, so the notes will serve as a back-up. They can also serve as something to focus on if you feel unable to look the therapist in the face and eyes.

I find making notes ahead of something works well for me. I also make grocery lists, to help me remember what to get, other wise I am likely to forget some of the stuff I needed to get.

I also recommend that you at least occasionally glance at the therapist's face, and for that matter, the faces of other people you speak to. NTs tend to get bent out of shape if you don't look them in the eyes, or at least in the face. An occasional glance during the conversation provides a compromise between their comfort level and ours.


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namaste
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05 Feb 2012, 2:23 am

i agree with others psychatrist simply handover medicines and ask you to leave
whereas counsellors talk with you but then they can manipulate you also
considering your vulnerability

i remember once a counsellor tried to tell me about her religion and how interesting
and helpful it was

so be alert too...


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