Because of my chronic loneliness

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And inability to make it go away because of this disease, suicide seems to be my only option. I've had it with watching other people succeed where I wish I could. I've had it with this disease and I've had it with feeling like an outcast. I don't belong among the living.

*Hug*

There is much worth living for friend! If you need someone to talk to, PM me. I used to be in your exact situation, and now I found a way to succeed. I can show you exactly what I did!

There is so much to life! I am sorry you feel that way, but It does get better. Feel free to PM me anytime if you want to talk

I've been waiting 7 months for it get better and nothing. Might as well kill myself!

Please don't. I can show you how to make it better. PM me.

And knowing about the Spectrum gives you the possibility of a tribe.

And also the possibility of skills of, not conformity not that, but of engagement with others including neurotypical persons.

I struggle with bouts of depression, haven't yet tried antidepressants, but they're kind of my ace in the hole. I really think there's a downward spiral in which the situational can swirl with the biochem. And thus I'll take whatever upward spiral I can get. Antidepressant right for my biochem might give me more energy to light-touch social attempts, even knowing that any particular new person or group is a one out of five at best.

A person can either get a prescription from psychiatrist, and I myself have not had good results from so-called mental health "professionals" (cough, cough).

Or, a person can get a prescription from a regular doctor such as an internist or family practitioner.

The trick is that the first medication may not work. And that it's sometimes important to step down from a medication in phases even if it doesn't seem to be working.

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Perhaps surprisingly because I am on the spectrum, playing poker has helped me read and accept other people (although I don't recommend it for the damn money!).

*Hug*

We want you here with us!

I know you've tried to hep but you can't make this disease go away, can you? Life sucks, but won't include me pretty soon. Suicide it is!

dont kill yourself! i know how you feel as i feel the exact same as you and it seems like the only way out. but ive made a promise to myself once im healthy again and can live a normal life im going to try my absolute hardest to make life better it was pretty good before my accident.

so i say you should try your hardest in the area's that you have problems and if you fail then either seek help or do as you wish

Think how lonely a gay person felt 40 years ago and how bleak the prospects felt for any kind of mainstream acceptance.

Now, I know some people object to gay rights due to religious reasons, not me I'm a good agnostic. And I think what potentially Spectrum Rights share with Gay Rights is the right to be different in a way which counts.

And I think the prospects for Spectrum Civil Rights are fair to good. Now, I don't think we should pressure people to participate, for political activism out of some misplaced self obligation is dry as dust. We should let people know there are a variety of opportunities. And if people choose not to participate, which is their right, they'll still benefit from a more open world.

Maybe Transgend rights is the right now civil rights struggle. Again, the right to be different in a way which counts. I hope and pray (if I were a religious person!) that Spectrum Civil Rights will be next.

I wish to respectfully disagree with something nrgandy said above. I myself have run into trouble when I have merely tried harder on my weak points.

I more like the approach, play to strength, be matter-of-fact about any deficiencies. With social interaction, just let a medium mistake be a medium mistake.

Well i can't sympathize with this because i am incapable of such emotion but i know how this feels. If you really don't have anything to live for, then suicide seems like a reasonable choice in all honesty. But for me i have a variety of interests and hobbies that keep me from thinking about my lonely life. Playing piano, drawing, gaming, reading etc. these things keep my mind at peace and i couldn't imagine living without them. If i didnt have these things and the only real goal in my life was to be accepted by a sh***y "NT" centered society then i would have surely ended it by now. The thought of another aspie dedicating their lives to being accepted is sad because its probably not going to happen the way you want. I have been "lead on" and had my emotions f****d with by a female. I have been used by people who acted like they were my friends but took advantage of my generosity and have been robbed many times. Now i live by myself in a small apartment and trying to get a job and get my s**t together. I don't even have suicidal thoughts anymore now that i'm out of the horrible ghetto druggy infested neighborhood i lived in.

Your posts aren't helping and are only making the situation seem more hopeless. You f*****s are telling me that I don't belong among the living and will never belong. That's why brain cancer will be easier to have than this current disease. I hope brain cancer befalls me and ravages me.

I am as pessimistic as they come but even I can't bring myself to end my own life. As far as it goes, seven months is nothing. When you've lived for 60 years or so without it getting better then maybe you have a point but death is forever (depending on what you believe). What I would do instead is try to get some help. Your local mental health facility should be able to provide assistance for little to no money if you qualify. I am actually getting ready to start that process myself tomorrow to see if I can get affordable assistance for my own depression and anxiety issues. Please try to get help. Don't let this problem get you. Life may never be perfect but it can certainly be very livable once you both learn how to cope and find other people that accept you for who you are.

Well having this "disease" how it affects me and my life I want out too! I have had WAY too many negative things happen to me that I could not control/prevent. A large part of society has the "blame the victim" mentality; makes things much worse. Accept what you're offered you're not liked much so don't be picky aka don't have standards and don't complain/voice your opinions.

My dad for the life of him won't just be okay with something being "wrong" with me....I "just need to get out there" "do" "talk" "socialize" "it's not hard". **Screams!** Recently he made it clear that he sees me as a failure...and even said becuase of that it's hard for him to talk to me! Started the process of changing my surname earlier this year I wish I went through with it. I will start it again just incase for some irrational reason I decide not to kill myself.

My plan was to reach a major goal of mine that I have been aiming to achieve for YEARS by the end of 2012 or off myself; 4 months to go! Doesn't look likely and I'm on the brink of ending my life often. I cried for 3 months every day without fail and nearly every day for 5 months and now not a week goes by without me crying.

It is a myth that "it's not worth it". Many people regret not offing themselves when they had the courage because their lives never got better or got worse. Many people become "okay" but never are happy. I'm not happy haven't been in years and am not even okay.
Many people are not okay and not everyone can be satisfied with just being okay. Life is not fair that is a fact. We don't choose to be born but we can choose to exit.

Hurting people, do what you can to make YOU feel better/good. Even taking revenge just leave the innocent people alone. To the majority of the world looks, status and weath matter far more than "what's on the inside". Most people even many aspies so it seems don't want to admit that. So no we should not care so much what people think about our "attitude".

In conclusion, I totally understand even how annoying and irrational the responses people make to posts like this are. "Get plastic surgery" with what money? "Life gets better" same line I was told 6 years ago "There will be one day in the future that will make you look back and laugh umm 1 day compared to how many days and years of pain?! I think not. No one can control anyone but themselves and I like many others are tired of being alone and at the recieving end of the whip(s). Sometimes the pain becomes too much to bare.

I hope I said enough to get some of the "pro lifers" to back off/down or at least think in the other direction (open their minds or be honest).

Whatever YOU decide to do to YOURSELF is YOUR Choice no one can live for you.