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I sent a text to someone yesterday that used offensive language as I wanted him to leave me
alone. He's sent me texts today saying to expect the police as he's reported me to them and that he's put my address and phone number online as a 'Cheap tart who'll do anything for a penny'

I'm scared!

Is it illegal to send a text with the c-word in?

I've already been warned by the police about somethign this year so I'm really scared if this is true and they come round I'll be in trouble.

Does anyone know where I stand legally as regards this issue?

I can't believe people can be so petty and spiteful

It is not against the law to to that word. If you have threatened the person, then perhaps something may be done. The person is probably bluffing.

Probably bluffing, I think his text to you would be as interesting to the police as whatever you've done to him.

Jason.

Unless you made a threat against his life or something equally drastic, you have nothing to worry about.

I don't know about the UK but here in the US I'm pretty sure you can't go to jail for swearing.
Honestly I can't see how it would be possible to even ticket someone for swearing
,
I can only imagine if he actually did call the police that they told him to stuff it, then wrote him a ticket for prank calling.

Save the texts. by doing so, you can establish a pattern of behavior that shows the other party is being predatory and making threats against you. If the police show, tell your side of the story. As far as it goes though, if the cops haven't come within an hour of his claiming to have complained to them I wouldn't worry about it. It is likely that either he is just making threats to gain psychological power over you or that he did indeed call the cops and they decided it didn't warrant further investigation. They have better things to do than run down people who have said or texted a dirty word or two. I would only be concerned if it can be established that you have a pattern of threats against this person and from what it sounds like the opposite is true. By getting the police involved it is likely that he would get in trouble for stalking, not you.

Last edited by outofplace on 21 Aug 2012, 3:27 am, edited 1 time in total.

This guy sounds damaged. Maybe you should just break off contact with him all together.

your worrying about nothing buddy

Sounds to me like psychological warfare to me..... I would seriously just ignore this person... I am unsure about laws where you live but i would think calling someone the "C" bomb wouldn't have you charged with anything. I have been in a situation very similar myself.... my suggestion would be to ignore any contact made by this person at all... they do not need to be encouraged in anyway.... also no contact them means you have nothing to worry about with the law... the other person would for stalking or such if they did no leave you be : ) hope this helps : )

There's no problem in what you've done so far. But be very careful, because he knows it and will try anything so you DO something that can get you in trouble with the Police.

The smartest thing you can do now is refrain from any kind of contact with this person and keep any messages or other proof that he's harrassing you, in case YOU decide to report him to the Police. If he continues initiating contact although you don't respond, I'd consider going to the Police myself.

He's playing you. Send him another one that says "Ok, but if you call the cops on me I have to tell them about those bodies buried in your yard"

What, British coppers arresting somebody for using the C word in a private conversation?
No chance. They're not even interested in common assault. They won't even so much as contact the person who did it and warn them to behave. As far as the police are concerned, low-level crime isn't their problem. Like has been already said, what he's done with that public message about you is more illegal than anything you've done. Libel is quite serious.

Incidentally, I don't think sending offensive texts is all that likely to get rid of people. It just gives them more attention and lends credence to their assertions. Ignoring them completely works a lot better. If you're going to shun, don't talk, shun. Sounds to me like the two of you are still emotionally attached to some extent.

You may want to try to find out if he really did post your address and phone number on the internet, though. I'd want that removed. I mean, I know people can find out pretty much whatever they want to find out, but I wouldn't want it out there for easy picking.

I agree with the others. Absolutely ignore this person. Do not respond in any way, shape or form. He's an *ss

Thanks for everyone's advice

I was worried that the Malicious Communications Act might have been used against me:-

http://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/1988/27/section/1

1 Offence of sending letters etc. with intent to cause distress or anxiety.

(1)Any person who sends to another person—

(a)a [F1letter, electronic communication or article of any description] which conveys—
(i)a message which is indecent or grossly offensive;
(ii)a threat; or
(iii)information which is false and known or believed to be false by the sender; or

(b)any [F2article or electronic communication] which is, in whole or part, of an indecent or grossly offensive nature,is guilty of an offence if his purpose, or one of his purposes, in sending it is that it should, so far as falling within paragraph (a) or (b) above, cause distress or anxiety to the recipient or to any other person to whom he intends that it or its contents or nature should be communicated.

(2)A person is not guilty of an offence by virtue of subsection (1)(a)(ii) above if he shows—
(a)that the threat was used to reinforce a demand [F3made by him on reasonable grounds]; and
(b)that he believed [F4, and had reasonable grounds for believing,] that the use of the threat was a proper means of reinforcing the demand.
[F5(2A)In this section “electronic communication” includes—
(a)any oral or other communication by means of a telecommunication system (within the meaning of the Telecommunications Act 1984 (c. 12)); and
(b)any communication (however sent) that is in electronic form.]

(3)In this section references to sending include references to delivering [F6or transmitting] and to causing to be sent [F7, delivered or transmitted] and “sender” shall be construed accordingly.
(4)A person guilty of an offence under this section shall be liable on summary conviction to [F8imprisonment for a term not exceeding six months or to a fine not exceeding level 5 on the standard scale, or to both].

In the text I sent I called him a 'Fat ugly c***' and I felt bad about it as soon as I'd sent it as using personal insults like that just isn't me

But the police haven't turned up and if they did I was going to say I said it to make him go away, although I realise it was a bad idea. I knew I'd done the wrong thing as soon as I sent it. I asked my friend who I live with if I should send it, secretly hoping he'd say something like
'No that's too nasty' but he didn't so I sent it. I never usually do stuff like that as you never know how the other person will react and also having been on the receiving end of insults myself I know it's not nice so would never tend to do it to others. I felt I let myself down.

I was even considering sending an apology via OK Cupid this morning as I still felt guilty about it.

Having initially made contact with him via Ok Cupid dating site last week, he was meant to come over here for a 'date' at 7.00pm on Friday but he never turned up and when I texted him at 7.20pm to say 'Are you on your way?' after a pause he replied 'I'm in bed' I said 'Are you ill?' and he replied after a longer pause 'yes I'm sick' I wasn't taking him seriously on that and replied 'Thanks for letting me know you weren't coming' and thought that was the end of it

Later around 11.00pm he texts 'Sorry' then half an hour later 'U not talking?'

I didn't reply thinking he should get the message

But no, yesterday morning around 6.00am he texts 'Morning xxxx' as if it's business as usual! Lol

I replied 'Why are you texting me?' He replied 'I thought we were friends'

I replied that with him not turning up and not even bothering to let me know he wasn't coming if that was his idea of friendship he could keep it!

He replied he did let me know

I said no he didn't it was only when I texted him that he'd given his excuse of being ill

He said 'Excuse?' I said yes it was obviously an excuse otherwise why hadn't he let me know before 7.00pm himself that he was ill. 'That's called manners'

He said 'I tried x'

I said no he hadn't and he seemed to think I'd put up with blatantly disrespectful behaviour and did he think I was simple or something

By now I'd worked myself up into a state whereby I envisioned, yes he had evidently seem me as some complete dimwit (as I'd told him about the Aspergers and the average idiot round here would interpret that as mental or simple) and this kind of attitude off NTs ENRAGES me!
It seems to make people like him think they can treat you like utter s*** and tell you any amount of lies and you (being a simple idiot) will just take it and keep coming back for more as obviously you won't have any better options (being autistic and all that!).

So I wanted to really make my point so I sent 'Lol you really did think I was some
dim witted ret*d didn't you? No that's you, you fat ugly c**t!'

But I regretted sending it straight away as that kind of language and attitude just isn't me - it goes strongly against my ethics to make personal insults like that. I got no reply so I thought 'At least the message has finally got through - good!'

Then I saw his 3 texts sent around midnight last night this morning re the police, posting my details online and me being the dim witted ret*d.

No visit from the police so far but another text later this afternoon saying 'slag'

So, as people have said, it could well be he was just trying to provoke me with the police stuff and is pissed off that I haven't responded.

I just hope he calms down and moves on!

I think I was entirely justified to get annoyed after he'd acted in such a crass manner and then expected me to still want communication with him - he was evidently too thick to even take a massive hint!

What I did wrong was the insulting/swearing bit which I acknowledge was wrong but when I act on impulse liek that common sense goes out the window! All my mind was full of was 'Why do the stupidest people on this planet think they are superior to me?! I can't stand it a moment longer and this person needs telling in no uncertain terms where to get off in terms of the major categorisation error they have made where my intellect is concerned!'

I lack the brakes in my brain when someone angers me past the limit of no return!

Those laws are probably more for people who are getting harrassed or bullied and not people who get into arguments. I doubt cops will take the time to enforce them even in those cases unless it's a severe case.

Because in their eyes someone not cunning, sly, calculating and manipulative is stupider than them. They don't think much of themselves and are used to people treating them from above, so if you respect them and treat them as an equal, you must be stupid, they figure. This kind of guy is encountered a lot when one is out there looking for a life partner.

The best way to get over the impulse to curse is to become aware that there are MORE hurtful ways to get your message across. Eg: you could've feigned you weren't bothered at all, then next time he did show up, just not open the door and the upteenth time he texted, answered him "I'm sick." and disappear forever. That way he can't get angry at you but only at himself for being so stupid he got had. Not being able to get angry at you hurts 100 times more than being cursed.