Getting worse.
I'm sinking so fast. Going weeks without talking to anyone. Feeling like I have done everything, and the only things I still need to do I am incapable of in my current state. Friends are mad at me for not leaving the house or answering calls. I'm out of money and I got a paper saying I was sued for $4,600 for a $400 credit card 3 years ago and they are trying to collect and want to take everything I have left, which is only my car and a thread of sanity. This was not just a collection notice, I was sued in court without knowing about it years ago and now they want me to list what I own and garnish wages (none).
I can only work for myself but my mental and physical medical states are so bad I can not anymore. I have no insurance, no official medical history to get SSI. I have tried once and hit an impassible roadblock getting diagnosis. I have a child and she is the only reason I am still alive, but I have gone from having her shared time to only weekends because of my current state and relationship with her mother and her husband, my ex-best friend from childhood.
I have always been the stable balanced person. I was the person people came to when they needed help. And I still I am, I am not gifted with the softening of depression, I am not crying or saying poor me, I am just watching everything get worse with open eyes. I can't do everything myself right now, and I have no access to help.