My best friend is gone.

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A couple nights ago i was really mad because I was up going through really bad memories. So in order to unload I sent my friend a huge angry vent. In the vent I said a few things I shouldn't have, I wasn't mean to her but I did show her the darkest side of myself. She didn't text me for an entire day afterwards. Just now she texted me. It's over. My best friend left me. After all we've been through together it's over.. just like that. You know when you're so shocked and upset that you can't cry or show any emotion for that matter? That's what I have gushing through me right now. I'm trying not to sound like a drama queen here but I'm literally mortified at what just happened to me. I feel like a huge gash just opened up in my heart.

that is awful!

IMHO, she wasn't as good a friend as she should have been, IOW if she can't handle you at your worst she surely couldn't handle you at your best either. IOW it was her fault and her loss.

A classical bit of wisdom auntblabby and quite true. I concur.

I?m sorry for your loss. I know it feels like the worst thing in your life but it will get better, I know that, because this has happened to a lot of us. You?ll find somebody even better in the future because that person will actually stay around.

Best Wishes

yes, us aspies need to stick together

I don't know what the letter said so I cannot judge it. What I do see is that she appeared to kick you when you were down. A true friend would not dump you like that.

I was rejected by someone who said that they loved me like a sister at the beginning of the year.

One minute she invited me to her Christmas day dinner because she said I was like family and got me several gifts. Then the next minute she was over at my house on New Year's day pouting like a bratty teenager because she did not want to be there. I felt like she rejected me when I needed her the most since I have been frustrated and stressed out about seeking employment.

I have looked back now and I realize that she was never really that interested in me to begin with. In fact she didn't even seem to like me due to various levels of jealousy and insecurity on her part. She was only around because she was afraid to say no.

The best thing to do is pay attention to the interactions while the relationship runs hot.

I have lost friends to various circumstances. Friends tend to come and go, few stay with you all the way. I remember a friend stopped speaking to me with no particular closure, her parents will never let her associate with me because they are so prejudiced towards me and think of me as this "bad influence" and yet I have helped several people find meaning and be happy. I didn't lose a friend yet, but this friend of mine constantly associates with people i couldn't even connect with, I would constantly feel excluded and my friend hasn't figured out why I hardly talk to hims and hang out with him. I'm giving the guy a chance. Another friend I had before (See Clearly Not A Friend on this forum) who had constantly criticized me and would make these excuses that would make me put too much effort into the friendship ultimately. I had bad luck with friends every now and then. Don't feel bad, as someone on the spectrum, I feel you.

This seems to be a common sentiment, but it depends on the individual to decide if it's a worthy sentiment to cling to depending on their circumstances.

For some people, yes, you have a really bad day once in a while, and it shows. Someone who bails on friendship after such a obscure incident was never a friend of anything more than convenience.

For other people that frequently have really bad days that they let be known(those with certain mood disorders for example), those around them will typically perceive that person's worst to be their best.

When it comes to friendship, you also have proximity to take into consideration. An example to explain the scope of proximity could be... someone you need to drive you somewhere. If 10% of the time, they get ill and have to cancel the plan and cannot take you where you need to go, the person you get a ride from 5 times a year will only disappoint you once every two years, but the person you get a ride to work to five days a week has the same reliability rate will disappoint you approximately 25 times a year. They're both just as unreliable, but the person who you've percieved to fail you more will most likely be seen as completely unreliable because you have a closer proximity to them.

So with friendship and romantic relationships, you typically do have to be extra mindful with the things you do and say, because you have so many more opportunities to make a deeper impact on a person's perception of you simply because you have more activity in that person's life to pile up a bigger tally of offenses. Unfortunately in the case of closer friendships, when you like someone, you don't typically want to upset them by letting them know they've upset you, so by the time you've upset someone enough for them to leave, the bricks of a mile high wall have already been set in mortar between you and them.

For people like myself, I've had to learn to cultivate peace in my mind, because the alternate choice to become cozy with being alone indefinitely has personally never had appeal... Solitary is a killer of body, spirit, and mind.

it takes so much energy to walk on eggshells all the time. a relationship should be the one place where one doesn't have to do such, where one can just be oneself with no worries.

There are people who we associate who are better known as fair weather friends. They are people who can appear to be friends one minute and turn it off the next.

In the case of the person who rejected me I asked if she was mad at me when she started ignoring me. She basically said that it was not going to work out anymore because we have different interests and personalities. She also admitted that she was very sad to reject me.

Then another friend of mine had attempted to contact her to get the story and she brushed him off with a little hint "Yeah I am very sad about her. At the same time I don't want to say anything bad about her."

That tells me that she does not like me.

oftimes people just ain't worth it.

Out of the frying pan and into the fire, am I right?

Hopefully soon either she'll realise she wants you back as a friend and will take you back, or you'll find someone else. For now, I advise you not to start blaming yourself, as that never ends well at all