17 Jan 2017, 9:00 pm
I am a seventeen year old girl with Aspergers, bipolar disorder, ADHD, and Depression.I have been going through ups and downs throughout the past months. I have had days where i'm severely depressed and then the next day I'm better and feeling fine. It usually happens around night when I'm really tired. I keep having these ups and downs and it makes me feel very horrible and worse about myself. Something usually has to upset me a lot to get like this. Then after that I start to think of all the other things that I have been struggling with. This just makes it worse. Another thing is I'm not very happy with who I am. I feel worthless sometimes, but somedays I feel like I can accomplish anything I set my mind to. But I have a lot of self hate and I don't really appreciate myself. I'm feeling really bad and when this happens I get suicidal thoughts. Not sure how to handle this. 
17 Jan 2017, 9:07 pm
17 Jan 2017, 9:28 pm
17 Jan 2017, 11:12 pm
18 Jan 2017, 7:39 am
18 Jan 2017, 3:14 pm
Thank you everyone for all the encouragement. 
18 Jan 2017, 5:22 pm
18 Jan 2017, 5:28 pm
Thank you. That means a lot to me.
18 Jan 2017, 5:32 pm
18 Jan 2017, 8:21 pm
19 Jan 2017, 3:58 pm
Everyone treats their own depression differently, but I have a sun lamp for the winter as well as plenty of exercise. I also have songs for all different sorts of moods to help me wallow in my emotions and then climb out of the abyss. For example, I might listen to the song "Invisible" by Hunter Hayes or "Still Fighting It" by Ben Folds to "treat" my bullied history with music. I might listen to "Eddie Walker" by Ben Folds because it's about a friend who was hospitalized and all of his Eddie's friends are coming to visit him.
But again, everyone has their own treatments. From an OTS person who also has bipolar disorder, I believe in you and you can do it! As Hunter Hayes said in "Invisible"
"If you look past this moment
You'll see you've got a friend
Waving a flag for who you are
And all you're gonna do"
Ban-Dodger
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19 Jan 2017, 5:31 pm
Dear GoldenWings32,
You are not alone in your experiences. I will try to help you with my response. What is happening to you is an interference into your mental-space by thoughts of foreign origins. You must learn how to control the «in-flow» of «thoughts» into your mind and pay special-attention to whether they are negative or positive (and practice keeping the negative thoughts OUT lest they «revolve» into your mind endlessly).
More and more, the world-populations will be experiencing these mental-subjugations of the mind, resulting in more and more people finding negative or depressing thoughts that seem to suddenly revolve around «endlessly» within their minds from out of nowhere for no «apparent» reason. When you «catch» this happening to you, one of the things you can or may need to do is to close your eyes and take in a deep breath, and mentally respond to the negative thoughts that they are intruding into your mind, and that those depression-inducing thoughts must immediately halt their intrusions into your mental-space.
Additionally, for purposes of providing some «interesting» reading material, I will quote from a book...
At first she could not remember any date, but when asked: “is it November 15th, 1906 ?” she replied: “No, that is next week.” Life had been a bitter disappointment to her; she had suffered constantly from chronic abdominal ailments, and finally, resolving to end her miserable existence, she had taken poison. She could not at first realize that she had succeeded in destroying her physical body, for, like most suicides, she was in total ignorance of the indestructibility of life.
Eventually, they convinced her that although she was dead, she still existed. This knowledge dispelled the “darkness” in which she had been immersed, and she dimly saw the figure of her dead grandmother, who had come to meet her.
The Wicklands made inquiries at the address she had given them, and discovered that a woman of that name had lived there, that her son lived there still, and that she had been taken to the Cook County Hospital where she had died the previous week. Upon investigation at the hospital they found further verification of these facts and were given a copy of the record of the case:
Mary Rose
Admitted November 7th, 1906.
Carbolic Acid poisoning.
No. 341106.
Cases such as these offer further support for the claim that the number of “earthbound” and “possessing” dead is probably substantial; the case of “Mr. P.” also suggests that many victims of possession may be wholly unaware of the influence to which they are subject. In fact, in some instances clairvoyants have seen and described possessing entities who were actually recognized by their victims, victims who had been entirely unaware of both of their presence and their influence.
GoldenWings32,
What I have just quoted above comes from a book that documents various research that has been conducted on the subject of death (more specifically: The After-Life). Just to clarify, I am not writing this post solely to you (GoldenWings32), but also to the influences (spirits) that may be connecting their thoughts into your mind (whether they do it knowingly or unknowingly). A lot of suicides occur because of multitudes of invisible earth-bound spirits that are unaware of their conditions, and they often unknowingly «possess» people in the physical-realm (and they are also similarly controlled by forces that are invisible to them), causing the still-living person to experience the exact same thoughts-and-emotions as the suicidal-spirit. You must «reject» any negative «thoughts» that enter into your mind in order to prevent your sanity/rationality from being completely taken-over.
I now address those of you beings who have somehow linked into the mental-consciousness of the Original-Poster. I am qualified as a spiritual-counsellor to be able to to address you. Many of you are unaware of the full reality and nature of your conditions, but there is a way to help yourself, and once you acknowledge that your conditions are not normal, and that you may indeed be in what the human-realm refers to as the after-life, you must then move on and away from this earth-realm where you will be able to feel happier. How? You must look up, look up, up into the Light, and once you finally look up, you shall see the Light where you may be guided and enter therein, thereby freeing yourself from being chained down to this earth-bound condition. Please depart from the mind/aura of GoldenWings32 so that she may begin to live in mental-peace with herself, and it will help all of you, too. I wish you well on your journeys.
I now re-address GoldenWings32. Recovery is not an over-night process, but I can assure you that this method does work, thus I ask that you practice from this day forth to keep your mind free, free from any and all negativity. I now leave you with a «Prayer» to be mentally repeated in your mind to our Creator at least three times a day. Said prayer was designed by a very wise man to help everyone in the world with their emotional-issues.
I see your Star shining above
please cleanse my mind with all your love
so that I may heed your call of peace from above
Note: 'Mother of love'* - you may choose to say: 'Father of love' or 'Mother and Father of love.'
http://www.the-testament-of-truth.com/t ... arpray.htm
