scale of -10 to +10, how do you feel right now?

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-1 intense boredom

-3 have a throbbing headache and im bored and feel like crap

Dying / 10

Almost there...

Reality is... wavy...

-6

-10 Lost the will to carry on atm.

-10

Lost relationships with several people within the span of a day. I will be homeless within a month.

What a time to be alive.

^ it's an awkward age.

i can hope that these changes are not irreversible...and bridges have been left intact in case they can one day be used again. whenever the day comes. if one must live in true homelessness, then hopefully you live in a relatively wealthy city, with moderate weather...

ahhhh.

-5. I feel serious anxiety. I am a elementary school teacher being told I do my job badly. They know I am autistic, but don't seem to care how they treat me. What's the point being part of a group who continually reject you? I have no place.

5.6. The great outdoors has certainly improved my mood, though I feel sad for leaving the beautiful scenery of the Dales behind. Have a massive write-up to get on with which is a niggling worry, some group-based field work that produced some weird data that just doesn't make sense, but I'll be damned if I'll let days spent slogging through peat bogs, streams, heath-land and mires conducting pH tests go for nothing.

-8. Won't bother going into detail.

-10

In response to a dear friend (above this) through messaging.

This feeling crawling around in my chest.. well. It's painful. It grinds around with my feelings and just feels like it's trying to claw it's way out of my chest. But alas, I hold it in. Soon, soon... it becomes dormant, resting within my heart and solidifying into a hard, black substance. Cold, lifeless.. Certain events stir this mass, causing me even more pain. It's usually quick before hiding away once more.

-4

ludutlfstdydht