Cynical lack of compassion

Post Reply New Topic

^^^I actually think you two can work together to produce consummate memes.

I was being serious

I was being serious

If me & EzraS teamed up we'd break things

I apologize to Ezra for being rude. It doesn't matter. I'll be gone soon enough. The post hit a nerve because I've dealt with people who talk like that to me, being sarcastic when I'm already defeated. They seem to revel in hurting others and causing pain. None of it matters though, so be it...

Resisting the temptation to say something that might be unhelpful or hurtful is a kind of compassion too.

Depression has led me to the Pit of Eternal Whining many times in the past. Neither hurtful, sarcastic comments nor cheesy platitudes ever helped me to climb out; in fact, they very often just confirmed my worst fears and helped to keep me there. There were a lot of folks who I wished would just have kept their opinions to themselves. If someone is in a bad way, however self-inflicted it might seem, the least we can do is to not do anything which might make it worse.

I think that each of us has a limited supply of compassion, so we all have our own different feelings about who deserves it - and some people drain it faster than others. I skip giving advice in certain people's threads because I remember how little I used to listen to advice and how ungrateful I used to be - I bear no grudges to the people who walked away from me because their good will was twisted to fit my story of being persecuted and yet more whining. It doesn't usually take me long to suss out which people are simply not going to listen, because I've been there and I know every trick in the book. If we only have so much compassion to go around, it is best saved for those people and situations where it might actually do some good. But starting a flame war isn't a very constructive use of my time, either.

So you're not a bad or evil person, Ezra; WP is a better place for having you here - you're just much wiser than I was in my youth!

This ^^^^

Love that Pit of Eternal Whining (not, but I love the name). That's a good one. Been there. Try to stay away from it. Mostly don't go there now, but used to be a familiar place. And like you said, Trog, there is nothing anyone could say to get me out. I've heard all the reasons to cheer up, including ones I'd like to hand out now and again, and I keep quiet because I would never have listened, never did listen and I suspect anyone in the Pit can't hear.

^ Yes, that is very true, too. Anhedonia causes the most profound kind of apathy, it saps your ability to even imagine that there are other states of mind that you could ever be in.

This is exactly what I was trying to say. When I am down, I cannot imagine ever feeling good again. It is only the repetition (pattern) over so many, many years that keeps me "sane" when I am down. Cognitively, I know it will pass. But the reality I experience is that it never will pass and I will never experience anything but doom ever again. Cognitively I just hang in there and do the best I can and eventually it passes.

On the flip side, when I am content and happy and doing well, I can't imagine how I could EVER get down again, and I think, well, I've conquered that one! Hah! And cognitively I know I will. The mind is a curious thing.