Very alone

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After 20 years of being with partner/wife we’re now separated. I live alone in a flat and its really making me ill. It’s my fault this happened as I have meltdowns that I’ve been unable to control when stress and anxiety get beyond my capacity to manage. So now, I have nothing as I am denied any access to my former home. Selfish as this sounds, I cant even get to see my dogs. Im slowly falling apart in this isolation

Would the managers of the flat allow you a small dog or cat?

Are you originally from Liverpool?

I once took the Merseyside train from Manchester. The area surrounding Liverpool is very nice. Liverpool itself has a great art museum.

I’m sorry you feel so isolated. Is there a park near where you live? I have found walks in this sort of Nature very soothing.

Having to rebuild everything is overwhelming, letting go of people, places, and routines is scary and feeling lonely when you are scared is the worst. I just want you to know that secure places and routines can be rebuild, it takes times, feels awful along the way, but you I’ll get there.
Do something new that can be with you, go for a ten minutes walk every day, listen to a new song.

I hope you can have your dogs with you soon.

I am so sorry for a life upheaval that must be devastating.
Have you tried therapy?
Were meds ever prescribed?
Can your dogs be brought to a park by a friend,can you play with them for an hour or so, and then call for them to be returned to your ex’s home?
It would help the dogs’s bewilderment and loss as well. The experience of being with them, even briefly, could mean so much when you are lonely.
I know.

Hello.

Any updates?
Are things better?
Have you contacted anyone regarding counseling, or access to your dogs?
Please let us know how you are doing.

They do permit that but I can’t leave it on it’s own all day while i work. We already have three dogs and I thought of having ind if those but I’d have to leave my job. The way I feel now is making unable to do anything.

Yes I’m from Liverpool. I left 20 years ago to be with girlfriend/wife. I do not have friends as I lack the capacity to make them. I’ve been asking for help since I was 14 with what I now know to autism, ptsd and fnd. 45 years of pleading with the nhs has brought no help. Instead I realise how cold, callous, heartless and uncaring they are. They have a great defence for this attitude too. FailIng to play by their rules will get you discharged and labelled as uncommitted or a troublemaker and then discharged from the system.

In America we have many organizations formed to hep those with specific diagnoses.
Though it may take some time online, reach out, find one in your country that will work with you or speak/act on your behalf.
Start here, at WP.
Start a thread asking about legal aid groups for autistics/Aspergers in Britain.
There are lots of British Aspies on WP!
Someone has been in your shoes, and can direct you!