Made a stupid mistake today

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Saw a mental health worker in the mall. She treated me with a warm smile and I guess I should have waved. But I have a habit of blaming everyone for my errors. So I gave the most helpless look what you guys did to me expression as a form of protest and she then gave off the most cold clinical creepy look she could muster.

It's hard being stupid. I'm trying not to piss these people off because they are supposed to be helping me. But I have the habit of doing that to others as well. Pissing them off and setting myself up as an easy target. I should bring someone in to advocate for me. I think I know who could. I don't know I've been on my best behavior before there, or at least thought I was, and got treated like s**t anyway as I was leaving the mental hospital.

I'm damned if I do and damned if I don't. I have psychological problems or something. But at least I went to all the avenues I could for help. It's just they did nothing and now I 'm dying in my apartment.

There's ass holes around here that like to mess with my head. It doesn't help it when professionals do that. I'm scared to go in and get my medication now.

She's a mental health worker, so she's seen worse than that. Just apologize the next time you see her?

I think you have summed up exactly what is wrong with some mental health workers. The MH worker should not be taking things personally, it’s not professional to do so and if I had a MH worker, I would not be wanting to acknowledge them at all in public. The damage that could cause is underestimated. The response given in the form of the clinical stare clearly indicates this and it likely influences the treatment/care you get. I see it every day in my job where workers think it is all about themselves as opposed to the person we support. I also feel some adults struggle to come down off their high horse seeing themselves as the almighty, unquestionable authority.

Please don’t be so hard on yourself. You are not stupid and MH workers should see the importance of helping you as an individual and what they learn to take forward therefore aim to build positive relations where possible to support you. No one ever learnt as much from someone really easy to work with. I work with young people coming from secure mental or criminal placements and am educated every day by them. We rehabilitate back into the community but I can’t do that unless I build positive meaningful relations and that’s my job, not my young persons. Relations are likely in their job description.

I like your idea of an advocate - I have done that in the past myself and think it’s a really good way of giving you support. I also see no harm in the advocate explaining that your responses may not be what they expect but no one should be taking offence. This is just my opinion and I am not a mental health professional however you should never be scared to enter these places or gap medication. That is failing care on their part.

Wishing you all the best with your next appointment!

^ Brilliant post.

Thank you! I am glad you agree. I feel very strongly that people are listened to and their opinions or feelings valued and that simply having a qualification in something regretfully doesn't necessarily make you great at the job. I have come across far too many judgemental adults or professionals for that matter who base conclusions on assumption or judgement instead of fact.

Best Wishes.

The therapists I have had (3 so far, as the clinical practice I use has some amount of turnover and one moved out of state) ALL have said in the first session that if I should happen to see them outside of the office, they will give absolutely NO indication they know me, unless I initiate. And that this is while I was in their care or and at any time in the future, even after I stop therapy with them.

They said it violates my privacy if anyone I may be with or even strangers just around know that they are a therapist and as a result would know that I know them — likely in a professional&client capacity. Some people, for very good reason, don’t want others to know they’ve had MH issues / therapy. Their interaction with you needs to be kept secret, unless you choose to reveal that secrecy. I imagine it’s linked to the HIPPA stuff.

It’s kinda shocking how this person doesn’t know or follow this protocol and might have out’ed you, even just with a smile.

Maybe you ought to show them what I just wrote?

Well I'm in Canada and have no idea how to protect my rights. Seriously. I actually didn't know when I turned 18 that I even had any. Sometimes I still forget that I have any. But I feel pigeon holed lately because I know I'm supposed to have rights but I have owners right now.

It's complicated.

But yeah we probably have laws against that here too. Now that you mention it.

I stay away from conventional psych. Is this med management? Wanna be MD in psychiatry?
Find the most intelligent psych. Bottom of the barrel like to gas-light and invalidate. Mop them up.
Put in a complaint with your state boards, eg professional boards of regulation if they give you crap.
Look at the states license search for the best.

Lol, anyway if there are laws against it in Canada I can't find them.

Ugh. I feel lately I'm just going in circles with the type of help I'm getting.

You guys are alright though.

Yes I'd have to pay for better therapy. I'm broke but thinking of doing it anyway. I'd like to just take the psychiatric drugs and not deal with psychiatry.

I think the mental health worker was the one who made a stupid mistake. You're her patient or client or whatever it is, she should be the one supporting you, not giving you evil looks back. Your reason of giving her an evil look may be due to your mental health - which is the reason why you see her! She shouldn't be giving you evil looks back and I think that was very incompetent and unprofessional of her. She needs extra training I think.

Sorry if this post isn't worded great.

There have been plenty of times when I’ve an interpreted a neutral look as an “evil” or judgmental look.

I'm not happy with free therapy but you could say the same with many things payed for and run by the government. But it's what I have for now. Despite the fact there are things that could be improved about it. At least it got me off the streets.

Yeah I kind of make mountains out of mole hills.

I need to take a break from wrong planet and focus on other things.

Yeh I know what you mean.
The irony of private especially where I live is that the majority also work NHS.

Try to stick with it. You already see some positives such as getting you off the streets and that’s brilliant.