hungry can't eat sleepy can't sleep

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and technical difficulties all over WP....driving me nuts.....

I have been Reeeeeely hyperactive all night....i bloody could not shut up..and I hate this feeling of not being able to feel...in regards to the bad stuff that is going on..(see relationship troubles thread)

i feel like I am in some sort of cycle of mania.

I felt like this the last time Flakey and i broke up...only this time we are not broken up...

it is not the worst feeling...it is the feeling of just feeling like the island of myself...not connected to anyone.

Flakey has been taking lots of xanax and is off in la la land....

i am all alone and wide awake.

spent all night making a fool of myself...talking to bands from Portland and playing ukulele non-stop....then I went and screened shirts...
I even found one of the guys in one of the bands slightly attractive...which hardly ever ever
happens...he was the odd-looking introverted soft-spoken one who walked around in a dark trench coat all night...Of course this made me terrified of and unable to speak to him...
Flakey says he doesn't care if I see other people...but it isn't my style..I usually do not want nor do I pursue...i get pursued...am usually intimidated by the pursuee and don't even know what is going on until the last minute...

i guess it is a tiny bit liberating to just kinda sorta be slightly attracted to another person concidering the circumstances...(see other thread)
I should just not make it out to be such a big deal..as I have in the past...it is a good thing i seldom am attracted to other people, because when I am..it is generally very painful and very stubborn...and can sorta turn into an unwanted loop....

I just need to relax I guess...

i just want to go to sleep.

I know exactly how you feel. The best advice I can give is to give it time. Try to keep yourself busy to get your mind off of just that subject. It's alright to think about it, but not to obsess. Do a hobby you like or hang out with some good friends. The best thing to do is not panic about anything because that can get very overwhelming. You have to find a way to distract yourself and leave certain times of the day when you can be as relaxed as possible to think about those overwhelming things.

Not sure if any of this will help you but that usually works for me. I try to distract myself until I am not so stressed by everything else to sort out my personal problems. Hope I helped a little bit. =)

thanks..it did help...
don't have m(any) friends to hang out with
but I do gots screen printing and ukulele playing....
and a big show to get ready for very soon...
also i need to throw myself into my sock monkeys
as people keep requesting them...i have been too
howyousay..uninspired for the last couple months for some reason...