Loneliness sucks.

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All of my friends have other plans tonight, so here I am, desperately clicking the refresh page button, looking for people to respond to my pathetic loneliness this evening.

I really am not comfortable being alone in my own skin.

Loneliness is really rough, I know im a bit late, but I hope everythings OK and you're doing alright

What I do when I'm lonely: read one of ny favorite books.

I'm in the same boat as you, OP. My loneliness has really amped up in the last few weeks...I originally intentionally left this site months ago but came back just because I've been feeling more isolated than usual and wanted some extra human interaction.

I'm alone all the time 24/7 been so for years.

Well, if anyone feels particularly lonely, my inbox is always open. I may not be the greatest conversationalist (hence why I'm here), but I'd never turn anyone away.

We're many people in the same boat, i am with you as well.
It's a feeling in which it is hard to shake off, distractions only helps for some time, but eventually the big L always comes back for a visit.
I do however though hope that we will learn to feel less lonely in time, or that we'll make changes in our lives somehow that washes away that crappy feeling of loneliness/ that the feeling grows to become a lesser occurring one in our lives, happiness and a sense of belonging in whatever way takes its place

It certainly does. Distractions work for a while but eventually you become bored and slowly you'll lose enjoyment from things that interested you before, things will feel worse and the only way to make things better if for the situation to change. It's hard not to feel hopeless sometimes, if things don't change what is even the point?

Loneliness sucks eggs!

But I have many ways of alleviating the loneliness--though I hardly ever succeed totally when I'm in this situation.

It's a heck of a lot better than doing nothing!

I know that the actual solution to this is to learn how to enjoy my own company. I have a strong dislike for who I am, which is why I feel more comfortable around people who feel differently than that about me.

I need to learn how to show myself the same degree of grace and kindness that I would show most other people.

When I can enjoy my own company, solitude will no longer be such a b***h to deal with.

All of this is easier said than done.

It really is amazing how much time I can waste with a page refresh button, however.

If I can show myself the same care that so many people here have shown me, if I can bring myself to that point..... Who knows what I will be capable of overcoming?

Why do you feel so badly about yourself?

Sounds like you're something of a perfectionist.

You don't go around stealing from people, murdering people, harming people.

Nobody's perfect. I don't see anything in you that I could dislike.

Like kraftiekortie said, loneliness sucks eggs. (I was gonna say something more profane but I didn't want to be censored).

Anyway, loneliness has taken me down paths I wouldn't wish on a dog. Just to have "friends" I bought people beer and drugs. Of course I indulged in it, too, but it did work to keep people around. As long as I had money I had "friends".

Loneliness did have its pluses, though. It gave me time to write short stories, screenplays, novellas, one novel, write and produce songs, take long trips unhindered, etc.

Life is just the strangest thing, ain't it?

I hate to admit it, but I have found myself cruising gay hookup websites over the last couple of days. I am feeling like a child in a candy store.

A part of me knows this is a foolish road to wander down. Another part of me is overrun with hormones. And another part of me just wants some simple and superficial companionship without any deep or meaningful expectations.

I will talk with my therapist before I proceed further down this path. This is territory that could mean nothing, or it could mean disaster, or it could mean distraction, but I know it's not a real solution.

Are you homosexual or do you just think it would be easier for some reason?

I am very homosexual. Zero interest in intimacy with a female. Femininity is a massive turn-off for me.