Really sad and angry

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I feel so sad and angry. I don't know what to do. I can't cope with it.

What happened?

Why are you sad and angry?

Someone was really mean to me, insulted me for no good reason, and then told me it wasn't wrong.

And when I got angry, used it against me and mocked me for it.

Think of it this way: You're studying Mandarin. You're into anthropology and linguistics.

What is this guy into? Probably crap!

I hope you find somebody better.

Somebody you deserve.

Thanks I just want to feel better and not deal with this all the time. It's so hard to accomplish anything when I'm getting upset all the time. It often ruins any plans I make to improve myself or my situation.

If I'm awake all night crying, I accomplish nothing the next day. I miss appointments, can't get homework or housework done. I can't do job searches. And the really bad thing is, I'm usually doing just fine until it happens and then suddenly I'm not anymore.

Sorry for complaining. I have no one to talk to.

What is keeping you from avoiding being around this person? Would you be better off not having any interaction with them at all? You probably can't change their behavior and you aren't able to be happy and functional when you interact with them. I think it's time to put space between you and them.

Well, we live together so avoiding is impossible. But maybe I will start keeping my guard up and refusing to react to these things.

That's why you should expand your study of linguistics.

But are you taking steps to change your living situation yet? You should be able to feel safe and secure in your home, but this can't happen living with someone who treats you this way. It's time to consider options for your future.

I'm looking for a job and going on interviews. I'm getting diagnostic testing. But this week is bad. There's a lot going on in my personal life (besides this situation) that is taking up any time I could be spending looking for a job.

I have no money, so a job is the most important thing, but it's difficult to get one after one hasn't worked in a few years. I became sick, so I had to quit until I got diagnosed and got treatment. But employers think that a person with a chronic illness is a risk. So I have to have a reason to explain my work history, yet if I say "I got sick", they are not interested in hiring me anymore.

Plus I know that I'm strange and appear that way during interviews, but what can I do about that? And I have no professional clothing anymore and no money to buy any.

I need to finish my degree and work at the same time to get into a better situation, but there are constant obstacles.

It sounds like you are trying hard to change your situation, but realistically, getting a job and saving up to move is going to take a long time, even if you somehow managed to get a job today. That means you would be in the dangerous and unhealthy living situation for weeks or months even under the best of circumstances.

Have you tried to get government assistance of any kind, for housing, food, medical, etc.? Have you checked with any local domestic abuse organizations? Have you checked with any job placement programs? Where are you getting your testing done? They may be able to guide you as to what options are available in your area.

Well, I do own the house, but I don't pay the bills. The original situation was more equal, because I was working and attending school before. But then I got sick.

I think I can get a job rather quickly. I'm very intelligent and capable, I just need more than 3 weeks apparently. I also know how to do many things.

I could, if I wanted, have a really crappy job in a week. But I want something that will look good on my resume and pay a decent amount.

I know once I have a decent job, finding another will be much easier in case I become unhappy at work.

And perhaps once I have a job the stress level will be lower and it may be easier to get along. I'm just concentrating on the job and schooling for now.

I'm sorry your living situation is tough right now. I know how painful that can be.

But if it helps you feel any better, yesterday you said what I was feeling was normal, which is one of the nicest things I've heard in a long time. So even if your situation is difficult at home, you made my day at least.

I have found that if I need to divide my attention, it helps to only do one thing at a time. So to the extent possible, maybe have days where you concentrate on school, and other days on work? That way you only have to consider one major life issue at a time

I'm so happy that I said something that helped you That actually makes me feel a lot better. I try to help people, but sometimes I feel I don't do a very good job.

I never thought about dividing my attention that way. It's so simple, but it never crossed my mind. I feel like I have to either deal with everything at once, or just pick one or two things and ignore everything else.

Focusing on different things on different days is a good idea. I was trying before to divide up hours of the day, and that worked for awhile, but I have a chaotic sleep schedule and that ruined it.

I know how rough irregular sleeping can be. I'm stuck in a hotel 700 miles from home for the next week and a half. I can't fall asleep at night even though I'm exhausted, and I can't wake up in the morning because I keep staying up too late.

But even that needs to be put in perspective-having a maid make my bed and clean my room every day is pretty awesome