Wanting to prove my detractors wrong

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I've had people push me around all my life and even on this forum I have those who do the same. I hate that I have to keep living a life of suffering while my detractors are free to point and laugh at me because I have no victories to show for despite my best efforts. I don't want them to celebrate anymore and I want to prove them wrong. I just hate how this year has started off badly and it shows no signs of getting better.

Sweet Pea hugs

The sick thing about my detractors is that they claim to hate my threads but have a compulsion to post in them.

Whatever you do should be for you, not for anyone else. And because of you, because you want it. Maybe as a side effect something is proven to someone else, maybe not. Doesn't matter.

Prove them wrong by being determined to prove them wrong.

The only way this will happens is if you believe YOU are a viable person. And if you put ”getting a girlfriend”
on the “back burner.”

That’s what I had to do to prove MY detractors wrong.

My brother, for example, never thought I would learn to drive.

Likely because they're frustrated by reading your never ending negative self talk and complaints and would prefer to read you post anything positive at all about yourself, things you're trying, things you're learning, things you're changing or improving, or anything else in your life.

There's only so long that people will be soft and kind and encourage you before they get frustrated with you shooting down their every attempt to help you and then just be very blunt in their reactions to you. They get to a point where reading your complaints seem like a constant cry for attention and sympathy and they don't have any more to give. They see little point in giving you a quick fix of sympathy that does absolutely nothing to improve you or your situation & would rather give you the blunt advice they think you need to hear instead.

I don't think anyone here particularly dislikes you. They're just growing tired of seeing the same negativity and complaints over and over and over again instead of any small glimmers of hope & change and an effort on your part to help yourself. That's my observation.

I can't list the names because the post will get deleted but there are some who indeed dislike me. They think I need to recognize my "white privelege" or else I am perpetuating racism, sexism, and homophobia just by breathing as well as getting high fives by my "fellow white men". One of them even claimed I drink margaritas (I don't) and just want someone as a sexual object instead of romance. This is complete nonsense in so many ways I don't know where to begin. If they think rednecks are my friends and Donald Trump is sending me money as well as hookers in the mail, they really need to come up in the world.

Just ignore those folks. They don't know you. They just know some sort of political thing, and they apply it to individuals whom they don't know.

Well when it comes to the people on this forum, you could start proving them wrong by digging out the achievements and positive things about your life, even the small ones, and posting about them here.

Criticism that has no basis in reality is always the easiest kind to ignore.

I don't see you as one of my detractors, by the way. The one who said I drank margaritas and wanted a "slut" immediately became the first to be added onto my foe list.

Well you dont seem all that bad to me. It just seems like your crying out for help like everyone else here. I dont agree with others that say you're just feeling sorry for yourself. To me you come accross as someone that has simply lost hope.

I would say that you should continue to write down what you're feeling as often as you can but maybe write in a journal. There are a lot of people online who get their jollies by bothering someone who is not in the best mood and/or think that a person doesn't have the right to complain about how their life has gone or about any injustices done to them. A journal won't judge you or talk down to you like a person does whether it's an online poster or in real life.

That's not the case here. At all.

Marknis has been venting his depressive complaints for months/years, and many people have given him positive advice about what he can do to improve his thinking, feeling, and general well being. It falls on deaf ears because he's not interested in doing any work to better himself & prefers to vent his frustrations and depressive thoughts in order to get sympathy from others. That cycle frustrates people who wish him well and would prefer to read him post about some positive changes & progress in his life instead of continuing to do the exact same thing over and over again. No one is "getting their jollies," by bothering him. They're fed up with the cycle of him asking for help and then completely ignoring every piece of advice he gets.

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Read the post by the person who claimed I drink margaritas and just want a "sex object". That is not advice, that is an example of a personal attack.

First of all, IF it were a personal attack it would be 1:MANY positive pieces of advice that others post for you. So, the ratio would be about 99.x% good wishes & positive advice to 0.x% personal attacks.

However, actually reading the post you're referencing reveals that it isn't a personal attack at all and that it doesn't even say what you think it does:



No one said you sit around drinking margaritas. "Margaritas," in the context of this post, is used symbolically to represent your sexual gratification by the women that the poster says you think should just be handed to you as if they were second hand blenders intended to blend your "margaritas."

I have not personally read the posts that Piobaire is referencing where you've said people should offer up women to you. But if Piobaire has read these posts of yours, their comment is entirely valid criticism. I agree that women shouldn't be treated like objects to possess for one's own sexual gratification. If that's the way you view things, Marknis, then Piobaire is in the right for calling you out and telling you that's unrealistic and inappropriate. The ending advice about losing the self-pity because people find it repellent is on point, too.

It seems you just really dislike hearing criticism that you need to hear.