anyone else feel isolated and lonely?

Post Reply New Topic

I am a 28 year old female aspie, I live on my own. I have few friends and those I do have I dont see very often. I especially hate weekends as there is nothing on TV, most shops arent open and those that are require a fair bit of travel and it is the time people meet up. Does anyone else feel lonely and isolated a lot of the time?

Yes, I certainly know the feeling of isolation.

I know the feeling of isolation and loneliness too well.

I feel it a lot and especially right now. I can feel alone even surrounded by many people which is what always happens.

Yep I know the feeling, but at least on the weekends I can forget about my isolation by watching hours and hours of sport.

Yes, me too. Weekends depress me, because there's this division between weekdays for "business" and weekends for "pleasure" (or "recreation"), which creates expectation that other people are doing fun stuff (what they enjoy, with their friends), but I've no one to have fun with myself.
Weekdays are only better because some days I have counseling appointments, where I pour out my woe & misery each week. Statred going to support group (not for AS, there isn't one in my area-but for overall mental problems). These don't help the rest of the time, though: mornings, evenings, and days I have no other scheduled social interaction.

Am too anxious & ill-at-ease outdoors, in public, to just magically meet strangers & become familiar with them, in hopes of eventually reaching friendship stage/level. Plus have lotsa' negative feelings/appraisals of self, which interfere with being shiny happy pleasant nice, so that makes people avoid me-and the cycle repeats (of "if I were so great, I wouldn't be so miserable & lacking people in my life-instead, people would like me & I'd be able to make friends-but, sadly, I'm alone & lonely so it must be my fault."). Aaargh.

This is me in a nutshell.

I do feel these feelings, not so much with loneliness, I don't really get lonely, I am not a people person, but occasionally I miss connecting with some human on some level, that feeling you get when you talk about an interest with a person and they agree completely and you two could talk for hours about such things. I had a friend online who I could talk to, a NT who I met online, who was obsessed with my obsession (he's been busy lately though, and we don't talk much lately). But if it is about anything other then my interests I just can't seem to gain any kind of satisfaction, and that is very very rare in real life that I have a conversation that really satisfies me, that is why I have basically become less social because I have become less expecting of social satisfaction.

hmmmm I think most aspies could relate to these feelings to some extent or another I know I can. And it's not even that I don't have any friends or spend loads of time on my own. A lot of the time I feel alone because I can't make the connections I want to with my friends, they either don't understand or don't have any interest in what I'm talking about.

I think a good solution for a lot of us is to meet up with each other........try and find some aspies in you're area who share some interests. I've not managed this yet but I have spoken to a lot of people online and even that makes a nice change.........not so much small talk just lots of deep conversations.

yea i know how you feel.the only group of friends i do have have moved off to college while im still at school..so im alone pretty much all the time.

Yes. Yes I do.

Yes, I have lots of friends and social interaction but the feelings of loneliness and isolation sometimes overwhelm me. I'm not sure why actually. I think a lot of the time I just feel different from other people, I feel like my thinking is on a whole different plane. It only makes it worse when I try to talk about it to one of my friends, and they forcibly insist I'm "normal", completely "normal", just like everybody else. I don't know why I care so much that they think that, it shouldn't really matter. I guess it feels like a loss of identity in some way. Maybe I am normal. Maybe everyone thinks like I do, but it just never comes out in conversation. Maybe I "grew out" of aspergers like my mum and some previous psychologists seem to think is possible.

I don't know who I am. All these confused thoughts run through my head (not the stuff I was just talking about mostly) and make me feel dislocated. I get trapped in loops, and philosophical queries. It is lonely, scary, and confusing.

I feel isolated but probably not lonely. It's been that way so long I just got used to it. I have had friends and a social life when I was young, so it doesn't bother me so much because I've done the parties, pubs and restaurants thing. Generally most of my 'friends' exploited me anyway. I think I would have to join a church or do volunteer work to find a social life these days but the town I live in is tiny so there's not much on offer. My notions of faith are so idiosyncratic I wonder if I'd even fit in there!

I have two dogs who are great company, they're my fur family.

not yet... I still live with my parents and my sister. I never go out, but at least i get to see people every day, as we live in the same house... What you described is actually the thing that scares me the most right now... I know i'll have to move out someday and it's damn scary...

yes i feel very isolated

Me too. I don't really feel that I am a part of greater society. I wish it would change.