Im in so much emotional and existential pain/noone will help

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any reason you're not trying acupuncture?

Hi again, nightbender. Maybe you need to tell your case manager more about your health situation so that he can help arrange some suitable treatment. He's part of your support system, after all.

Have you discussed your suspicions about drug damage with a psychiatrist? Psychiatrists have a lot of training in the use and side-effects of these sorts of medications. It worries me that you still don't seem to have a solid diagnosis for most of your problems. You shouldn't have to be left guessing about symptoms that have such a drastic effect on your life.

I'm glad that the sessions with the chiropractor have heped you to feel a bit better. Have you been doing anything enjoyable over the past few days? I think everyone needs to have some activities that they look forward to help get their minds off their troubles for a while. Jenny

i will be doing it, i mentioned it with my chiropracter and head said it was a good idea he just wanted to wait to see how the adjustsments were working out before i went ahead, that and finances and time contstraints.

I really would like someone to dix this problem, i dont really know why i havent broached it with any one. Im considering telling him about it, though my mom says i should not.

I acutally went to one once about that and he just tried to medicate me again, with many of the same medications that had caused my problem in the first place

Its been my personal experience that psychiatrists absouletly have no concept of the damage their drugs do or if they do refuse to acknowledge it and have no way of dealing with it., though if one were to give me a dx for the damage that would be good.

THis is the thing i want help but im not sure what to do or how to go about getting it, or remeber to do anything once i get off wp, though i should problally try, its just virtually impossible to make basic decesions.

Why doesn't your mom think you should tell your case manager about your health/cognitive problems? Surely he needs to know- he's paid to help you, isn't he?

I agree nightbender, your case manager needs to know everything. If you want to feel better, then you cannot hold information back. Do not worry, I am sure case managers, therapists, have seen it all. What is important is your well-being. Gee---I took like 11 pages of notes to my therapist once. Jenny is right, "he needs to know" since he is paid to help you. Do not short change yourself.

i v have told him a littel about my cognitive problems not this reaction

She doesnt think he can do anything about my problem, i guess because she is the one taking me to the doctors and getting me too them and is going to school for this, and that im just getting to know this one and dont want him thinking maybe i dont deserve to be here, i v told my old case manager and he didnt do jack all

i just told him he suggested a nuerologist

Hi, nightbender. I'm glad you told him. Seeing a neurologist would be a VERY good idea, I think- you would finally get some real answers. Could he help to organize this for you, or could he talk to your mom about it? I know that your mom has been trying to help you, but you will need more than just faith healers and a chiropractor to sort out damage done to your brain by medication.

Are you going to get an appointment nightbender? An important thing is to find a professional you can trust. I discovered something interesting earlier this week. You can learn a lot about yourself by the posts made here on WrongPlanet. I have started printing out all of my posts I have made so far. You could print out some of your posts---the ones that pertain to your challenges. That could possibly help a professional in helping you. Jenny and I can offer our support/help, but it is going to take someone to personally see you and comprehensively go over your life history. Jenny and I will still be here in your thread---so keep posting. We want to help by offering our support.

yeah he is going to give me a name and take me whenever im ready

I hate existential pain. It's like, the unbearable anticipation of the pain of the rest of forever.

all of a sudden just a attack of the realization of how helpless and pathethic and empty my life is.

I have random breakdowns like this. It would be easy if I were comforted, but no, I'm all alone in this. I always think, I'd be saving myself a lifetime of suffering if only I killed myself. There's just no relief, is there?

Hi again, nightbender. I think you should ask your case manager to take you to see the neurologist as soon as possible. There's no point in suffering longer than you have to, is there? You need answers so that your life can start improving. When will you next see/speak to your case manager?

protest_the_hero, I'm sorry you're feeling like this, especially at such a young age. Do you have a counselor or perhaps a parent who you can talk to about it?

im going to be doing that


i ve been talking to someone over the phone who has been peer counseling me. she has had many similar experiences to mine. thing though is she doesnt seem to understandt that i have this reaction and thinks i have some kind of controll over it and thinks i have progressed several stages i never passed. she talks to me alot about the universe and horoscopes and some new age stuff as well as the happenings of the natural health, recovery and, human rights movements. I think their is value to some of this but i dont think its going to fix an accute medical problem. SHe gets angry lately when i mention that i have this problem and asks about how i can move past it. Lately she has been telling to not bother going to doctors because they cant help me.
I dont think she quite gets that proccess of coming off got sidetracted early on and sees everything she mentions doing soul work alot wich is something i cant do right now.