Dear "You"...From "Me"-Letters Unsent

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Dear dad,


just because your dad treated you like s**t doesn't give you the right to treat me like s**t. At least TELL me about your issues with your dad instead of trying to be a man and keeping it all inside. I don't see you as legit; you don't impress me with your manliness and pretending you can take whatever abuse is thrown at you because I know you can't and you won't admit it and you're not much of a man at all. are a coward who belongs in front of a firing squad.

Dear Dad,


it wasn't lost on me that you sen me to private school for two years, or that you sent me to Europe, or that you offered to send me to Europe to work there if only I'd come back when I left, or that you got me Myst 3: Exile, that you were going to get me Uru, that you got me Tomb Raider Chronicles, that you joked with me about my bears and my classmates and the people on the Myst boards I went to, that you bought me a Backstreet Boys CD and gave me your old CD player and you listened and made amusing comments to all my obsessing about Myst, the Myst community, the Titanic, the Fabulous Five series (particularly Hit and Run), the Backstreet Boys, the Spice Girls, America's Most Wanted, airport security, my bears, etc. It wasn't lost on me that you got me the first 5 Harry Potter books and were going to get a whole new series for yourself so that you'd have your own copies and I'd have my own, and that you spent hours reading and rereading Harry Potter because you were obsessed with it just like me but also to have something to talk about with me.


Sometimes I have depressive episodes where I say true things that hurt. I'm sorry I had to but I'm not sorry I did it.

Dear parents,


oh yeah, I forgot. In case you were wondering, I don't want to live with you any more because my mother has never kept a promise to me, except small things like that she would take me out to dinner or something (stuff I never asked for). She promised she would never nag me again but she did hundreds of times since then. She would leave me alone but she still nagged me. She promised she would never tell me what to do but she did about 20 times since then. She promised she would never go thru my stuff but what does she do? She goes thru ALL my s**t and reads my journals and papers. All this when I left and they didn't know where I was and she was begging me to come home, or when I left another time and agreed to come back provided she never nagged or told me what to do or walked in on me or went through my stuff or anything. At least my dad knows that he's incapable of making promises so he's never, ever made any.


I hope you read all my s**t, since you have nothing better to do. Now you have no excuse for it. Now you have no excuse not to get a life. Now I'm gone.

Dear mother,

if you're still lurking around here too ashamed or afraid to post, now you know how I feel about getting s**t for being me.


I'm in a place now where I don't have to pay for room and board with my self-respect. I don't have to listen to nagging about how I'm getting older and older and really do need to hurry up and do something. I don't have to listen to you trying to make me sound good for others, saying I'll be going to school and doing this and that. I don't have to listen to you talking about how things are so hard for me because I have a disability. My disability was this: being with you and being emotionally abused. I don't have to have anything taken out on me ifthere's a fight between you and my father. I don't have to eat s**t, and the same old s**t at that, and only once a day at that, and only a limited amount of it at that. I don't ahve to feel guilty about asking for something I'm dying to eat because my father is stressed or tired or something. I don't need to listen to you giving him a hard time.


You might be worried that I'm being used or abused, emotionally or whatever, but you really don't know a thing about emotional abuse.

Dear LabPet, Postperson, Zsazsa, that other b***h whose name I forget, and every other b***h I don't know about (they were mostly b*****s... interesting. One or two bastards, but other than that all b*****s) that has gone out of her way to call me an attention seeker,


go to hell.


Hugs and kisses,


Ana

Dear Me,
Face it, noone is ever going to give you a job. Even if you have the most skills and experience, the job will go to the person whose gestures and body language are not "not-quite-right". All those skills and knowledge that you spent so much time and effort count for nothing, in the end all that anyone is looking for is someone who will make people feel nice and comfortable and good about themselves.
Two words: Gun. Head. The sooner the better, that way you can stop wasting everyone's time/

- Me, who doesn't actually own a gun -

Dear Rachel,


don't make me feel guilty for existing and using people's resources too! If you want to talk you can PM me.


Dear sweet mummy,


I am a piece of s**t but all I'm trying to do is s**t my s**t so that I'm not a piece of s**t anymore. That's the way I felt at the time and I get so into my memories sometimes that I'm living them all over again.


I've never talked to her this sappy any more; I'm embarrassed or turning bipolar or something.


Dear Forest Laboratories,


did your s**t do something to me? It's okay if it did. I was f****d up to begin with and I probably needed the stuff or I'd be an animal or something today. I just want to know if it contributed to my bipolarness now.

[quote="aspergian_mutant"][quote="Ana54"]
You might be worried that I'm being used or abused, emotionally or whatever, but you really don't know a thing about emotional abuse.[/quote]
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Code for what? Is this some kind of weird computer program that deals with emotional abuse?

Dear Ana,

shut your mouth now or one of these days someone is going to shut it for you.

Your concerned friend,

Ana

Dear Me,
Right, you've had your moment of feeling sorry for yourself. Now, stop whining, grow some balls (so to speak) and use your brain to work out how to succeed.

- Me -

Dear Rachel,

don't tell yourself to stop whining. That makes me feel like I have to stop! Whine all you want.


~Ana

Dear as*hole mother,


I thought you were getting all nice and sweet. But no. You care more about how I treat others than about how others treat me. You were always like that. It traumatized me from a young age, from about age 3 or 4. What kind of a mother are you? I remember once when I was in grade 2, and we were at the school barbecue, and I was on the jungle gym and this boy started picking on me and saying nasty things about me, and I called him an idiot, and you f*****g told ME off and He got away with it. If you would just admit it I'd forgive you.


~your imperfect daughter

Dear hypocrite mother,

I'm glad you admit we're not all perfect. But I absolutely CANNOT live with you ever again because you and I clash HORRIBLY.


You WHINE about how I whine too much.


You do not know how to be diplomatic, and that's why I don't. ou never taught me. You use words like "whining" to describe what I say and is that diplomatic?


You also don't know the meaning of positive reinforcement, only negativity. That's why I'm the same way with you right now. I don't know how to positively reinforce you being nice to me. You say if I don't stop swearing they're going to ban me from WP. Why don't you say "If you want there's this lit of more unique words here to get your point across better..." or something along those lines. Instead of a passive third-person threat. You are not Alex and you don't know him. I know I'm not Alex and I don't know him either-- we've really talked only once-- but COME ON.


You say that I have to be a role model, be positive in order for others to be positive, but DO I SEE YOU DOING THAT??? Nope. You always have to include just as much negativity (aka "warning", to keep my character balanced I suppose) aka uncalled-for third-person threats.


Why?


I'm negative too,but at least I don't LIE and say I'm positive.

Dear University:

I WANT OUT! I NEED A BREAK! WHY ARE YOU KEEPING ME AWAY FROM MY FAMILY!? IT'S NOT FAIR! I FEEL TOO OVERWHELMED AT TIMES!

Also, you should really consider firing your director of the DSS, since all he does is intimidate the disabled and doesn't do much to help. He only does things based on how you guys do things. In fact, I was furious with how he reacted to the situation with the translators for the deaf quitting.

Anyway, I personally think things are just too buereaucratic here. The students come first.

Sincerely,
Joshua