scale of -10 to +10, how do you feel right now?

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-8

Got dumped. Of all the times, it's at Christmas. Yeah, what a great present.

0

I helped my dad put one of the family dogs to sleep today. She had advanced liver cancer, and it had spread to other parts of her body. On one hand I am sad to lose a very good friend, but on the other hand I know she is now free of the pain and that nasty stuff.

I can't grieve though. I have tried, but it is shut off like a light switch.

Insomnia has been so-so lately from the anxiety of the new job. New job is going very well, so hopefully the insomnia will lessen.

-30 or so (please forgive the length. I'm having a bad month)

-Loosing my car... sucks, but isn't what's eating me really. I think it's the coffie.
-Name calling and rude questions that mean the same thing..."Are you stupid?"/"are you for real?please"..... sucks, even if it's not for me I have a hard time dealing with it.
-Very, very tired of conflict.
-random strangers at work saying mean things to me, even though we just met. "Does it look like I'm going the wrong way to you?!" This was because I looked at him briefly. How paranoid, geez. "Bye Frank." despite my name being right in front of her in three inch lettering. My name isn't frank. I do not look like a man that would resemble a "bro" or a "Frank". I look like a 30 year old woman with bad hair.
-Someone persistantly useing a certain H word like it was absulute, despite them getting over half it's meaning wrong. Frustrating and annoying when they preach it.
-I have been in almost constant paranoid anticipation about the future. My routines keep changing, and it's makeing me feel crazy.
-Being confused more than usual, and knowing it.
-Moveing to a new apartment
-Parts of current apartment in need of maitanence, but knowing they aren't very good repair men.
-Ants have reinvaded our kitchen.
-Someone in my area of Houston got shot last night, and I hear everything. "bang bang bang" *woman screams*. Short time passes, cop and fire truck sirens. More short time passes, another siren, more like the ambulence, but I heard that one only once. Oh oh!
-Loosing five tickets, and thus anticipating an angry boss. *cring*
-My face is breaking out in zits, and my head feels dizzy. Might be stress related.
-Watching my mother be stressed, of course, makes me feel stress to

One of those times when all the $% comes at once. 'sigh' I just feel like s**t..

-100

I learned that the woman I had been pursuing for nearly 2 years had found someone else. She was everything I wanted to be, had all the same interests as me, and was very physically attractive. I even looked the other way regarding her constant lies and her seriously distorted views regarding personality and communication.

I want to take my own life right now.

+10

I just now deleted a PM, without reading the bull s**t excuses within

+4 I'm feeling pretty good considering....

I got some things done around the house, and I'm about a +5 today.

I found out I am 10 weeks pregnant and I am feeling excited about it I also feel like this So I think I am confused That gives me a score of +10 and -10= 0

I dropped both my toaster strudel on the floor!! !!

-10

I'm at a -10 right now. I lost my retainers, my sister is driving me up the wall and my parents are going to kill me for losing my retainers.

0

We went to a car dealer to get me a new used car. 2005 corola. I found one that I liked, and we spent half the day filling out paper work. Yay.... We discoverd something that really makes me mad. Sombody stolen my identity, and is in debt up to 987 dollars currently. I want to kill them, of course, given my history with money. I didn't get to drink much water while we were there, and I have snot all over the inside of my lungs, so dehydration doesn't help me. We got the car and brought it home.

I didn't act very excited, my brain was in an ailing/aspie mode at the time. Man, I'm tired. It's great that I got a new car, but I just don't grasp what is special about it being new and such. I'm still displeased that my old cutlass oldmobile of 1988 is now dead though. 'sigh' You live, you find new blocks in your path. I wish I could pay back my mother for all this. What also annoys me was something we needed to fill out needed 5 @#$% refrence people. FIVE?! wtf. Is this world against hermits like me or what...

-10

I feel like I am in a rapidly descending spiral of meltdowns. I say horrible things to those people who set off the meltdown, and I feel extremely guilty about it. I wish I wasn't at home; I wish I moved out; but that's another story. I am convinced that being at home is somehow bad for my mental health...yet, I have to stay here (since I don't have a job). So obviously, I need to stop having these meltdowns.

I guess it's the pressures that one gets put upon oneself, either by him/herself or others, about finding a job, moving out, etc. On top of that, you have a brother who hurts your feelings (even if he doesn't mean to...he "claims" he's being sarcastic), and on top of that you have a mom who uses a very, very loud voice every time she gets even the slightest bit mad. Add to that a situation where both parents are simultaneously talking to you at the same time, the TV is on very loud, and both parents are (relatively speaking) being loud. And then I started yelling and being disrespectful to my parents. *Sigh*

I had a huge meltdown today, kicking my closet door several times until my dad burst in and told me to stop. At which point, I yelled at him.

I feel horribly guilty about this, yet, sometimes I find that it is a bit out of my control--once the meltdown gets started that is. I have tried my hardest to contain it, but when someone tells me, a 21-year-old to "go to your room," and treats me like a little child (Mentally, I'm like a 15-year-old, not a 5-year-old), then pretty much tells me I'm not going to be treated as part of the family (today (or any day? Not quite so sure :/))...well, it's enough to send me over the edge.

I wish I could stop melting down :'(

+5.5 Doin' OK today/tonight. I think some of it is from the lack of responsibility that the weekend brings with it.

-10 because my f-ing dad hates me and wants to throw me into the cold. He has a serious anger problem with me and so when he starts treating me like s-t, I treat him the same by cussing him out. He deserves this because of the way he treats me. Everyone is against me and I want to die. There is no point of living if everyone hates me and is after me (the gov for example).

-10

AS is uncurable. Everyone does not care that I show no symptoms, they are all sadistic b******s.