Raves

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My new hairstyle

I was depressed and scared and had another depressive episode almost as bad as the one I had in Edmonton that made me have to go to a shrink and take antidepressants. Just thinking about it makes me have another one so I'm going to stop now. I came f*****g close to losing another piece of my soul to a black hole. It was so awful, the worst thing everr. Not quite as bad as the first one but pretty darn close. I feel better now that I found some potatoes and eggs and mayonnaise. I can make potato salad. Something that will prevent me from getting black holes because I can think about how tasty it is. For a while. Then it will comeback and I don't know what to do.

I GOT A JOB!! !

PA to an interior designer.

She lives locally.

I won't have to do teamwork. ( )

She will pick me up from my house.

And she is willing to fit my hours of work around my music teaching!

i got a haircut today and the girl kept asking me questions and i just gave short answers, she told me im very shy. Then she cut my fringe a bit too short and it looked a bit weird and when she was trying fix it she ask's me
"do you want me to cut the sides a bit shorter"
me: "hmm i dunno"
her: "come on say something its your hair"
me: "but i dont want to ruin it anymore"

I don't have anything really good to say that makes me happy right now so I'll just tell some happy memories I guess. Like at sailing camp. I sort of miss it. When we were on the second-floor balcony of the Junior Squadron and tied ropes to a life jacket and then Adrien, the heaviest of us probably, got into it wearing the life jacket normally, and we would pull him up. I think we got him up onto the second-floor balcony once, and another time he fell but wasn't hurt. I also enjoyed sitting with Alyssa and Rebecca at lunch. Alyssa had felt seasick, or just sick, that morning, but still wanted to sail. Rebecca liked that and was proud of her friend for it. (Others also said they were seasick, but it might have been an excuse not to sail, lol). So then we got to talking about illnesses and Alyssa told a grossish story about getting her kidney unclogged when she was 6 and Rebecca told us about when she got her ears unblocked or had something done to prevent them from blocking up in the future or something. We would tie each other up and try to get out of it. Victoria said she could get out of anything because her brother and sister tied her up all the time at home, to trees and stuff. Once some guys were pulling Adrien across the room as he lay tied to two benches. Karl made a comment about them using up two benches and Victoria retorted, "So? You'd take up three!" (Karl was big, round and plump.)

i love my dogies and kitties...they're heaven sent, if i didn't have them i might have killed myself a long time ago. they're precious.

I had my first track meet ever yesterday!! !! I ran the 400m hurdles and I...
1. finished
2. didnt fall
3. didnt come last
4. didnt even hit one hurdle the whole race!! !!
! !!!YAY ME!! !!
My next race is next week and the week after that is counties where you can qualify for regionals... I am so going to make it! lol (dont know about that last statement he he, but i will try)
It has been a good day!!

We're going to the store later to get some macaroni and cheese and milk and cereal and juice (real juice) and stuff, yay!

I talked to a psych nurse today who said she didn't think I was socially ret*d even though she thinks I'm AS because Jack told her I was.

I'm excited about going to church tomorrow and to the bipolar support group and the "Coffee House" for Aspies, and we went to a historical park yesterday and it was pretty and I found some pretty string on the ground that I can make stuff out of!

Let me see, happy memories. I used to write stories always with the following characters:


Charity Chandler, fun-loving mischievous but overall decent leader of the group
Randal Spinelli, Mr. Hotshot Practical Sensible Superhero
Sidney Walker, the genius lacking in simple common sense
Spencer Freeman, over 400 pounds in grade 11, favorite pastime eating
Sofia Spinelli, Randal's cheap-Italian-ghetto-child-but-trying-to-seem-more-civilized sister
Cora Peterson, the spoiled rotten arrogant rich girl
Stephanie Forger, longing to be free and would rather be a ghetto child than live with her overprotective, stifling family
David Sunfellow, argumentative and claustrophobic
Timmy Baxter, hypochondriac
Reeva Delorme, disaster-happy as a way of coping with health problems like cystic fibrosis


I had a lot of fun with The Guildmaster, getting all these characters together and interacting with each other in a stressful environment!

okay, I´ve got 2+ today in anatomy! yay!