Verbal Communications Differences and Difficulties Sticky

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Lelia. You have to bear in mind that this thread is on its tenth page after four months. Making it sticky ensures that it is not that hard to find (but nothing is perfect). I have been reading it all, ever since it started. It consists entirely of well thought out, interesting posts. At present, I still feel that making it into a whole forum would be a bad move. It works well, as it is. Plant a rhododendron in a field, and it doesn't suddenly turn into a sequoiadendron.

(And I think I prefer the rhododendron.)

What a beautiful rhody! It looks just like the painting in my foyer painted by my mother of the 20 foot tall rhody in the front yard of my parent's. Sniff.

I was just thinking that hundreds of WrongPlaneteers don't know this exists, like I didn't until two days ago. I badly want to hear from the nonverbal members. One of my children is nonverbal always; I am only under extreme stress.

I'm not sure if I belong here. I barely talk to people and I think that most 10 year olds can talk better than me.
I often stutter and mispronounce words, which used to make me feel anxious. Now I just shrug it off. I still find it hard to talk to people. I'd have so much more confidence in myself if I was non-verbal.
I'm much better at writing my thoughts down than speaking them.

Penseive, I know how you feel. Often when I go to new places I think "Oh, I'll just pretend I am mute, I won't talk at all." But I cant keep my mouth shut!

I sometimes wear a badge which says "I have speech difficulties" I always find it funny that people speak slower and louder to me, same as if the badge said "I have hearing difficulties!"

Occasionally others will sign to me, assuming I'm deaf (I'm not) but I'm not even remotely close to knowing sign. Whilst at the Neuroscience Conference in November I carried my DANA to write if I was expected to respond. But my name is French and Alaskans do dress differently (than most in US) so I was spoken to in French!

I've considered a card stating I'm mostly non-verbal but like Teddy said, this can be confusing to outsiders. Or worse, they think I'm stupid and treat me as such. I also get nervous when strangers might touch me, like brushing against me in a store, but I surely cannot write that.

I didn't say, but one student at the University has been teasing/bullying me some....he can apparently be quite obnoxious to others but I'm really vulnerable. We're both grad students - same program so I must see him nearly everyday. He's loud and overbearing too. I wrote a respectful letter to advisor about this matter since it became necessary to do so. Advisor spoke to this student but student still doesn't 'get it.' He's been teasing about "I'm tired of being Neurotypical, I think it would be fun to 'switch'......." And plenty more worse - very offensive and I'm hurt. He's saying, aloud, phrases such as, "Must be hard, being Autistic." Mental Scream. I do very well academically and I'm shy/conscientious! He's been doing worse and this is bullying.

Anyway, yesterday, before I taught my Chem lab session, I cried (hard) in a remote hallway upstairs. One from my class saw me and asked me what was wrong - I just showed her what I wrote, and cried, cried, cried. She read my letter (to my advisor) and, surprisingly, started crying too. Then she just held me. I guess I don't really like when one touches me (like hugging, shaking hands) but she did comfort me and I felt better. She also said she herself would speak to this obnoxious student - relief. She's the only one who knows, except advisor.


lau - thank you for the flower picture! I haven't seen a garden flower since late August! Beautiful color too. Right now just snow and ice. And I think this thread works well *Sticky!* Except I may not have properly named the thread...some purusing might not know it's about those who are NV. But I know what you meant, lelia! I didn't know you have children and one is NV - I cannot imagine what that must be like for a parent. Maybe this thread will help.

I'm sorry to hear that LabPet. People can be so cruel. But some are that way because they have their own insecurities and it makes them feel better about themselves.

Ah Teddy, my problem is I don't say much but when I do my speech just doesn't come out right.

Art by Martin Ramirez! I don't intend for this art link below to be tangential & I don't think it is. Here's why: This gifted artist had (he's died some time ago) schizophrenic and therefore his communication (and other links to others) are strictly limited. Albeit, we're Autists (not schizophrenics) BUT I love how Martin used his difference, which can be crippling, and made this his gift - then shared his art with everyone to enjoy.

My (just moved away) appt neighbor has schizophrenia and I really liked him. He did have difficulties communicating and relating to others, of course, but he's a really good guy with a lot to offer. He likes graphic arts and computer science. Anyway, I thought you all might like to see this special artist's contributions:

http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2008/12/1 ... l-illness/

I'm impressed! Check through the 'slides' since he's has a few pieces features here. Many with autism/AS are gifted artists too, in various mediums.

its funny if somebody asked me what i do during the day i run through the house on my tippy toes, flap, drink my gingerale from my sip cup lol, and just make random noises hahaha all day long. All my animals give me the weirdest looks and just follow me around, i wonder if they know im autistic or something, i bet their prob thinkin, one of these days she'll actually talk to me, and pet me, instead of ignoring me or hugging me too tight lolol. does anybody else just make noises all day long?

_________________
Being Normal Is Vastly Overrated

I guess I do, and I wouldn't always be aware. It's not overt but still there. If I need something, like another's attention (my professor, for instance), I'll often sort-of whimper/whine, like an animal! Sometimes I'll hop when I'm excited to show my work.

I don't too often get love/attention, but I can purr like a cat. Same kinds of things as mentioned.

I don't like being hugged, by surprise, either - Age1600: I totally understand. And, if someone might think you're autistic, then 'Yah! for them.' You do beautifully well and should be proud of what you accomplish. Btw, do you have a pet? I bet you would LOVE a pet! I have a cat, Tesla, and my robot V8 (featured on my video) - one might be a great friend and 'our kind' tend to have a rapport with animals like no other.

John Elder Robison wrote in his book (John's an Aspie - great sense of humor, etc), he will often say, 'Woof!' THE all-purpose answer. Works for me.

Have a great holiday, everyone!! !! If I don't write before (and stay far away from any shopping place - scary).