scale of -10 to +10, how do you feel right now?

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Not sure if I can give this a number but I'm sure it is below 0.

Mom is in Virginia. She just called and told me that she is going to give her husband another chance. It turns out that he might have Bipolar disorder and people with the disorder make irrational decisions on the fly. She said they had been talking and he wasn't thinking clearly when he left and had been crying for the past week, which his sons can vouch for. It's mom's call and I understand he probably has that disorder but I don't think she should take him back right away. I'll be respectful to her decision but I can't swallow this and I know things won't be like they were. Our entire family is pissed at him so I know they won't approve. Ugh, this is all going to be one big mess. I don't know what to feel or how to handle this.

Damn, that means his hoodlum sons may be coming back around too. That I know I won't be able to handle. If even one stays then I'm going. I'm tired of the trouble they caused for mom and me. We have been happy without them here and now our new found happiness is in jeopardy.

^I think it is wise that your mom is going to wait a while before taking him back. You should keep talking with her so she doesn't change her mind and take him back right away.




0 - Feeling neutral mostly, although my mood keeps swaying from good to bad.

On a scale I feel about 185 pounds +/- 10 pounds.

-5

Yes I yelled very loud in traffic today, comming home. Hopefully we can all continue through our stupid hellish lives and forget about this. It's not secret around here... I don't like being tailgated! Period!

Imo, if you are in a real actual hurry, your not going to risk a collision, now are you? That includes not driving so close to someone that they can't see your headlights at 40MPH or 80 MPH, and nearly hitting them in the corner of their $$$ like you are invincable and they don't exist. It's #%$^ dangerous, and you need to stay alive till your destination, obviously.

Second, you go around what's holding you back. You don't swerve back and forth behind them in five lanes of unpacked/hardly busy traffic, to "see what's the hold up", even though traffic is going 60 MPH. Someone whoes in an actual hurry doesn't waist their time with that! Tailgaters do! They risk lives. Tell everyone, with their driving manor, "move it b***h!", and go off looking like some distracted, whitless Saint! God, I hate it!

-4, but I almost always feel that way. -4 is 0 for me, I guess.

+1

0

I still haven't found a decent internship for the summer.

-10 or so. I moved across the state to be with a girl (a NT), left my friends, and then a few months later she decides to come out as a lesbian. And I had such high hopes because it was going so well, for so very long...

^ Wow, that sucks. I had a similar experience in high school. There was a girl that I had a crush on and I thought I had a chance since we were friends. However, she turned out to be a lesbian. I was saddened so much as I was shocked. I had been shot down many times but that was the first time I had ever been shot down that way. Anyway, hang in there, you'll find someone else.

4

Okay I guess.

+5 Today was pretty decent. I went on an 8 hour road trip, had a little run-in with the police, and got stocked up on my meds. I can't complain.

5

I WOULD be about a 9, but I feel really bad. My sheepish boyfriend finally broke down and tried to kiss me tonight... but I wasn't expecting it and I turned my head.

Oops.

I would have let him try again but he was too embarrassed. Poor thing. He should try again tomorrow.

9.9999 I am going to Hollywood after all! I know you all will hate me for this but the event is being put on by Autism Speaks. The event is called "Heroes for Autism" and big time people are supposed to be there. I have 2 art pictures that are going to be in this event. The entire cast of the TV show Heroes is going to be there, along with Hugh Laurie from House which is my favorite TV show of all time. The event is on April 19th but I am leaving on April 15th so we can do other things in that area as well. Less than 2 weeks!! ! Only around 10 true autistic artists are going to be in this show. What happened was at first my name was on the site as one of the artists, then they pulled my name off along with several others. Then my mom wrote to Autism Speaks and they thought my pictures were the best out of everyone's there and they should put me back in the show. There was a period of unknown and because of this I think I broke a tooth and maybe cracked some other ones from grinding so much. It is very painful. Next month there is a possibility of going to New York for a show that is being held at the UN. So, Im starting to become known in the art world and soon in the speaking world. If you don't believe me that I am going to this huge life changing event, go to www.heroesforautism.com and if you want to find out my name, go to my website in my signature and go to about the artist (its not updated with the new info yet, in fact its so old that my age is wrong!) but then go on the Heroes site and go to "the artists" and you will see my picture. So, in the end Autism Speaks isn't all evil because maybe they will make me famous!

^Excellent.




Another +5 day here in Pennsylvania. Not much to be excited about, but not much to complain about either. That's good enough for me.

2

He didn't try again.