scale of -10 to +10, how do you feel right now?

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0 - I'm not happy, I'm not miserable, I just am.

-3

I am so very angry right now! I hate dealing with people at Church organizations, and I'm NOT GOING BACK!! I am dam tired of this 'join the chit chat club' nonsence, and if I really have to take this verbal chore, I can get it from my next crappy JOB if it's a life requirement! I just... want.. to be left ALONE.. .already! Why do I have to be a fake and make a load of friends?! I want limited friends, not a crowd, and what made them think I even went to Church for them in the first place!? Like what the f**k...

-3. I was about -7 earlier, but I had an email from my penpal and it calmed me down a little.

-5 can't really hang on to something here...

3. ok, sort of. An irritating day, which contained insects, bossy people, traffic jams, amongst other things.

-3ish

Today started okay. Then something I ate gave the start of a headache that gradually got worse. Then with all the noise going all at the dinner cafeteria, I got a sensory overload. Hopefully, the rest of the night will be more peaceful and then I can maybe sleep it off.

maybe around a 2 or 3

-10 can't sleep, having suicidal thoughts again, wish I had sleeping pills to take..

-8 nothing is working out for me at all...I feel like a dissapointment to my family and I really don't know anymore

-8

-9
Since jun 2009 my life got MUCH worse, even though I thought it couldn't be possible.
Everyday I continue seeing bad things happening to me. Things I can't control. People treating me like the worst guy in the world.
I don't have a good financial situation. Having to work completely overwhelmed to support my family (my bipolar I mother mad and in the rehab at this time). My anxiety impossible to control, swallowing air, belly pain 24/7. No relatives support AT ALL.
I wish I could be at home all the time, but I can't. Receiving very basic support from 1 friend. Never had a girlfriend, I said NEVER.
The only thing I ask god (which is impossible for me to believe) is my death as soon as possible. Suicidal thoughts most of the time.

+4.

I haven't self harmed for a month. That's good, i guess.

+ 7

Good mood but agitated as usual, I like feeling energic but at the same time maybe a littlle calmer wouldn't be bad. The idea of medication is always in the back of my mind, but I fear the numbness so I guess I'll stay restless. Maybe some herbs ?

-3

My mom said that women rarely watch the Simpsons and South Park.

-2 -.-;

What ironic luck I have. This comming week I planned on filling out those three last applications for the last bit of my unemplyement benifits, then kick back and actualy relax for a bit. On the 3d next week, I am to appear in coart, for a pointless jury sommun that I might not serve anyway, and in a city that is across two states from me!

My Father has called these idiots telling them I have been liveing all the way south here, for two years! Of course.... they don't listen to him! What money will I have to use when I travel?! MY BENIFITS! My dam benifits! I always have to be miss "need mommies help"! Can I drive for two days, and two nights without sleep? Yes! That's how it will have to be, given the timeing! I bet I will be lucky enough for something in my car to BREAK in the middle of nowhere, costing me another $400 or God knowing! To top it off, I will have to have her checked prior to the trip!

I can't afford a plane, now can I? The bus? My mother would say "No! Certainly not! I don't want you to be stranded like your sister was." I have been wanting to visit, but does life gotta force me to go? Really!... rrrrrgggg! .. and for what, just so some imbocile can be like this "ohhhhhhhh.. I didn't know."
"You didn't know?! My own Father only told you five hundred plus times, lady! Hell! He probably shows you his dam drivers liscence and it wasn't enough, by now!!"

-10

Not.. in a good mood..