scale of -10 to +10, how do you feel right now?

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-5 Angry at myself for forgetting overdue bills, and for my damn overeating problem!

-10. Arguing with a misogynistic as*hole on the Internet is making my blood boil. I don't know if I should continue with the douchebag, for interacting with him does nothing but make me angry and distract me from other things I have to do.

5.1 for, I hope to get some sleep tonight and not be troubled sleepwise..

+10

I had a very good day. I went to an all day picnic at my clubhouse. I played soccer, badminton and volley ball. I also had 2 burgers and pop, for lunch. It was great fun.

+2-5. Feeling much better now.

-2. I haz a headache

0. There's some good mixed with some bad here, so it becomes a wash.

My best friend is coming up here sometime today (he lives about 100 miles away). He is also aspie. However this afternoon I was gonna meet up with a gal at a "beer release" event.

I'm looking forward to being around her, and trying to be more friendly and talkative. She's kinda cute, but even if I don't get a relationship going there - just at least use this to develop social skills and for once I can feel like I'm not an awkward outcast. But my best friend now is in the equation - and he never shuts the hell up. EVER. Can't stop rambling about his core interests, which even bores me to tears after a while.

I'm really worried about how he's going to act tonight, which means I'm stuck being around him and not her. Because I don't want her to think negatively of me by having him droning on and on. I can't get myself to tell him to shut the hell up and go with the conversation rather than having him control it.

4

I'm going to finally get tested by someone who is qualified today which both really makes me happy that things are finally getting figured out, but really anxious all the same -- I get that way when I have any appointment that I can't rehearse perfectly in my head beforehand. Along with that, I thought I fixed my financial aid issues with University, but nobody seems to be calling me back which is making me really nervous, thinking maybe the issue is still standing.

Better than usual though ^^

5....

-9 I failed my sup exam, I want to kill myself before my parents do.

-9 bad migraine, bad marriage, life sucks

~Kate

I am sorry Melbi. Right now I am around a 0. In some ways I am doing well and other ways I am not. Right now the thing that is helping me is building model airplanes (another one of my obsessions). It is weird that I am a female and love building balsa wood planes and play first person shooters. Weird. I get in different moods. I either have to play computer games and obsessed with that, build model airplanes, learn a language (a lot of times weird languages) draw and watch lots of movies. Most of these are done for distraction to get me away from horrible things that happen. At least we are getting people to help us with my brother's company. I am worried about my mom because I strongly believe she needs back surgery and during her last back surgery she nearly died. Surgery is life threatening to her. Also she needs allergy testing for different pills because she is allergic to most antibiotics and I am afraid that the testing will kill her because even though they don't force you to take the pills but you are still in contact with it and some antibiotics she also nearly died. One of them gave her a fever of 105. That can give you brain damage. So I am anxious.

-2

Wish I could sleep...