scale of -10 to +10, how do you feel right now?

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2500 +/- 250.
I've exams in a little over a month, I'm in a similar boat to yourself, I want to do well too. I hope tonight goes OK, maybe if you write down a few questions about one topic and see what angle you can approach things from...but nothing that will make you want to tear your hair out. Let us know how it goes.

I had a shower and emailed the Samaritans a few moments ago.

1.
[rant]
Got the 7th grad school rejection letter of 9 today. The wording irritated me. All the others were "nice," this one flat out said I "wasn't competitive." Funny, this was the lowest-ranked school I applied to. I'm not sure if I should take it as an insult, or reason enough to believe I'm not getting in to grad school this year if the bad school rejected me.

Still got that exam tonight. Having to memorize material on both sleep and sexual development is proving to be a bit difficult. Lots of information. Haven't even started studying for tomorrow's exam, I'll do that after I get home tonight I guess.

Going to have to look for a job now. Have had zero luck locating anyone that wants to hire a B.S. psychology grad around here. That means I'll probably have to go back to my hometown... Not really looking forward to that either. I could look across the country, but I'd be even more uncomfortable in an unfamiliar city with absolutely nobody I know.

I'm going to have to make new friends. I suck at making friends to begin with.... After five years of college, I've all but forgotten how.

Then there's all the stuff that was irritating me last night. Still irritating me, but I've ranted enough, so if anyone gives a damn they can check back a page or so.
[/rant]

1. I always get morning sickness now. >.> HAHAHAHAH yeah right I'm pregnant. But I feel sick, and I got very drunk last night. I also had very sad dreams.

-100

Intense pain.

Took off yesterday first time in 137 days because my left knee popped out of joint, swollen all to hell. Did not eat yesterday because could not walk to D-Fac.

Have to work tonight.

Deal with the pain or go home.

Pain making me almost euphoric from the endorphins flooding my body.

crazedchef

-1. Found out some stuff I said a couple weeks ago while blacked out. Apparently said I was upset my ex was transferring schools. Not sure why I said that, consciously I don't give a flying f**k. Now the last month of college, already stressful because of aforementioned reasons, will also be awkward as hell, and I sincerely doubt anything I say to her would convince her it was simply drunken ranting. Getting past people for me doesn't mean I stop giving a s**t.

If anything, I think I was pissed because I wanted to work towards simply restoring our friendship. After the s**t hit the fan nearly 8 months ago, I was more upset about losing a good friend than anything else. I think I wanted to try and get that back. Like that'll happen now... Realized that as I typed it. Now I'm closer to -2.

when it rains, it pours...

1 and too depressed to go into it or reply empathetically to everybody else who feels like s**t

1.
Very bad OCD evening. Worn out and sore.

I'm at a 3. So, the average for the page (not including the -100) is 1.82/10. Pizza party on me if we can get it up to 2, people.

1. Lonely.

1. Realized that I'm being completely self-destructive again and don't really care. Plus, school is back in again tomorrow, and there are now more long weekends for...well, a long time.

3. I feel sick and hot

2.
Feeling a little unwell and my friend isn't online yet.

Aww I hope this person comes on soon.


2.

5. I was hoping to say goodbye to RedMage before I go on holiday.

Thanks, hope you feel less lonely.

0.
Friend still has not come onto messenger and I am too iffy to focus on anything other than that. Time of month