Magic Mushrooms/Marijuana and depression for Aspies
Sweetleaf
Veteran
Joined: 6 Jan 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 34,833
Location: Somewhere in Colorado
This is a sort of ego death. Before, you put on this "normal" front and were in denial. I used to be similar until recently. Once you realize that you actually are and have been autistic, possibly significantly so, it can be devastating. I imagine you will get past this a better person.
Sweetleaf
Veteran
Joined: 6 Jan 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 34,833
Location: Somewhere in Colorado
Do you want to be acting normal? What I have noticed with mushrooms is they tend to bring out all the things on your mind right out into the open and kind of forces you to look at it and think about it, if you where unhappy trying to act normal and what not its very possible while tripping you started questioning that, came to some depressing revelations/realizations and so now you aren't really feeling the motivation to continue that....Hard to say what would have caused your trip to turn out bad, perhaps it had something to do with the marijuana interacting with them though I find marijuana to be helpful if a trip starts getting unpleasant or maybe it was just a coincidence that you smoked it near the same time something else triggered it to go bad. But yeah the depression could certainly contribute to less motivation in general which would also effect putting effort into acting normal, or fitting in. If you talk to the therapist about it would probably be good to explain the whole thing to her...like don't leave out the tripping part since that sounds significant.
I've had one pretty bad trip, and it took me a while to totally recover from that I am thinking.....but at one point during it I was certain my mind was stuck all screwed up but yeah it was kinda simular to what you describe like not being able to form thoughts or make sense of anything, I am thinking in my case it was the movie I decided to watch tripping that caused the bad trip....but yes an 8th for ones first time is a bit extreme I'd say.
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